Sanctuary
by Chuckyegg
Summary: Rachel has been alone for a while, when she comes across strangers in the woods. Who are these new people? Can she trust them? More to the point, who is she? A British girl alone in the woods. Who was she with before? Negan. Eventual Negan smut.
1. Chapter 1

She'd been alone for about 3 weeks at a guess. Fighting the dead, hunting for food, and trying to find a safe place to sleep. She had become quite proficient at hunting, and with her bow and arrows she was quiet too, which came in handy with the walkers. She'd been almost useless in the beginning when the dead started to rise, but she'd learned fast. It was either that, or die. Some she'd learned from others, some through trial and error. She tried not to think of the others. They were either dead, or gone, either way it didn't matter she thought, she was probably never going to see them again. And it hurt to think, so she continued to walk through the woods, bow and arrow in hand, focusing on catching her next meal.

Her head shoots to the right as she hears a noise in the distance. _Voices._

She moves quickly but cautiously. Well aware that not everyone left was friendly. In fact, she knew that it was most likely the opposite.

As she nears, the voices become clearer. "You fucking, fucks are dead! You have no, fucking, idea, who you're messing with!"

"Gag him up will you. I'm sick of listening to his shit!"

She can see them now, six men in all. Two of them are tied to trees, hands and feet bound with rope.

She stays out of sight, crouching, watching, assessing the situation. She's never turned her back on those in need. But it's hard to tell the good from the bad these days, and being tied to a tree doesn't make you innocent.

Still trying to figure out her next move, one of the men stands and turns in her direction. That's when she sees the W on his forehead. _Wolves!_ She thinks, grimacing.

"I'm gonna step out for a piss," he announces, leaving the group.

He leaves to her left. She follows him silently. He unbuckles his belt and begins to relieve himself. She's behind him, drawing her knife. The wolf doesn't have the chance to finish. She comes up behind him, grabs his hair, and swiftly slits his throat. He makes guttural choking noises as he drops to his knees, uselessly grabbing at his throat. She finishes him with a knife to the side of his head. She checks himover for weapons, hoping to find a gun, but to no avail. She makes her way back to the other wolves.

Two of the wolves are sitting on a log with their backs to her. The other, is standing in front of the two men they'd captured.

She draws her bow, aiming at the wolf closest to her on the log. The arrow goes straight through his head, exiting his eye. He falls onto the man beside him. The wolf turns his head towards his comrade, a look of amusement on his face. His eyes widen and his mouth opens. He doesn't get any words out before an arrow goes through his neck. He falls to the ground with a thud. The other wolf turns and ducks, just in time to avoid an arrow. The arrow hits the tree behind him. She rushes forward, drawing her knife. The wolf runs at her. She's only a tiny thing, the wolf, who has almost a foot in height on her and outweighs her considerably, easily knocks the knife from her hand.

The two captured men look on in awe.

They both go tumbling to the ground. She grabs at him uselessly. But he's on her, his hands around her throat.

The captured men try to free themselves from the rope with no luck. "HEY!Get the fuck off her!" One shouts, angrily, almost growling.

The wolf smiles at her. "Maybe i'll have some fun with you first?" His left hand releases it's grip on her throat, greedily making it's way under her plaid skirt.

The anger builds inside her, and she brings her knee up hard between his legs. He lets out a squeal, instinctively bringing his hands down to his crotch. She doesn't waste the moment, grabbing a knife from her boot, she pushes his head up with her left hand and slices his throat. She turns her face to the left as his blood spews all over her. She rolls him off of her. Knees either side of him, she plunges her knife into his temple.

She looks a sight. Face, hair and chest, covered in blood. She absently wipes her knife on one of her over knee socks as she stands. She stands over the wolf. "What an arsehole!" She says, turning towards the two men. She looks them over from a distance. One has a handlebar moustache, brown hair and eyes. The other, has black, slicked back hair. He's wearing a black, leather jacket, with a red scarf. Which she thinks is strange, considering how warm it is. They're both staring at her in awe. Leather jacket, however, is smiling at her. And she can't deny, it's one of the most beautiful smiles, she's ever seen. She also thinks it looks a little crazed. "You're not gonna make me regret saving you guys are you?"

"Wouldn't dream of it, sweetheart," Leather jacket smiles. She nods, walking towards them.

Moustache guy pipes up. "There's another guy, he went off to take a piss."

She shakes her head. "I already took care of him."

Once again they stare at her in awe. Leather jacket never takes his eyes off her.

She goes about collecting her arrows, not neglecting to put a knife through wolf number twos head.

She makes her way back to leather jacket, resting on one knee before him. "If i cut you loose, are you gonna be nice?"

He smiles. "Sweetheart. You just saved our fucking asses. And then some. We fucking owe you. And after what we just witnessed. I don't believe we'd want to risk pissing you off. What's your name, beautiful?"

"Rachel," She answers.

"Rachel. I'm Negan. That's Simon," Simon nods. "We have a place. It's safe, secure. We have people. A whole damn, shit load of them. We, are the saviors. And you. Are more than fucking welcome, to come join us. What do you say?" Negan smiles.


	2. Chapter 2

Rachel mulls over Negan's offer as she cuts them loose.

The thought of other people both pleases and scares her. She can't deny, being alone is not agreeable with her. However. The thought of new faces, faces she knows nothing about, makes her nervous as hell.

The three of them stand, observing the massacre before them.

Negan turns to Rachel. "Well? You wanna come with us or not, sweetheart?"

She looks up at him, a man of considerable size, to her at least. "I'm not sure.. i mean.. i don't know anything about you?" She replies, honestly.

Negan raises an eyebrow. "You just saved our lives."

"So?" she interrupts. "That doesn't mean anything. That's just what i do. The kind of person i am.. and i've come across those arseholes before. _Wolves_. They're like damn parasites. Worse than the walkers. I would have put them down no matter what."

Negan nods slowly, a sincere look on his face. "I hear you. I get that you're cautious, hell! None of us would be here if we trusted every motherfucker we came across. But we could use someone like you. What you did here. That, is fucking, badass! And i need all the fucking badasses i can get. At least think about it?" He smiles.

Rachel appears deep in thought. "How far is it from here? Your place?" She asks.

"Not far. About an hours drive. We've got a truck five minutes from here. Look. You seem more than able to handle yourself. You're smart. Why not just come and see? If you don't like the way we run things, then you're free to leave. Hell! You could probably slip away in broad daylight without any motherfucker noticing!" Negan laughs.

Rachel smiles. "Okay.. but if you try anything. You are so dead!"

"I don't doubt that for a second," he answers, smiling.

Negan turns to Simon. "Sweep this area, make sure there's no more of those fucking.. what did you call them?"

"Wolves," Rachel answers.

"Wolves, get David on the radio. His outpost isn't too far from here. See how many men he can spare. Don't fucking skimp on this though. If there's any more of them fuckers out here, i want them dead, got it?"

Simon nods, picking the radio up off the floor. "Yep. I'll get straight on it," Simon glances at Rachel. "I'll see you at the sanctuary, that is if you decide to stay. And if you don't.. thanks. You really did save our asses."

"You're welcome," Rachel replies, watching him leave. "Are you sure that's wise? Him going off on his own like that? What if he comes across more wolves?"

"He'll be fine. We weren't being careful earlier. That's how they got a jump on us," Negan reassures her.

"So which way's the truck?" Rachel asks.

"Same direction that guy went to take a piss. Which is good. Because. I wanna see what you did with him," Negan grins.

* * *

Rachel and Negan search the wolves for anything useful, but all they find are two very blunt knives. Rachel watches as Negan picks up what appears to be a baseball bat covered in barbed wire. She'd also swear he was saying something to it under his breath. "That's an interesting weapon," she says.

"She's mine, bastards just fucking threw her on the ground! She hates being on the ground!"

Rachel stares at him, confused. "She?"

Negan glances at Rachel briefly, his eyes immediately returning to the bat. "My Lucille. She. is. Fucking. Awesome!"

Rachel looks at Negan looking at the bat. This has got to be one of the strangest things she's ever seen or heard. The way he's looking at it is the way you might look at a lover. She's not gonna lie to herself, it's fucking weird! She's starting to doubt her decision.

Leaving with this man? A man she's known all of five minutes. A man, who's standing there, talking to a fucking baseball bat named Lucille!

But the thought of possibly finding others sways her. She still hasn't given up hope, that maybe, just maybe, someone from her group could be there. So what if this guys a fruit loop? Things don't work out? She can just play along then slip away first chance she gets.

"You ready to go, sweetheart?" Rachel jumps a little He's leaning the bat, or Lucille as he calls it, over his shoulder.

"Yeah" She nods, walking to his left so as not to stand to close to the bat. _Take someones eye out with that if you're not careful,_ she muses.

* * *

It takes them less than a minute to reach the first wolf she killed. And Negan is more than impressed. His face lights up, grinning from ear to ear. "Holy fuck!" He says laughing "Didn't even get to finish his piss! Died with his fucking pants down. And not in a good way.. damn!" Rachel smiles a little uncomfortably. Usually, she's good at reading people. But she's having a real hard time with Negan. They continue on to the truck.

"Don't mind me," Negan says as they walk. "I've got a fucked up sense of humor."

Rachel glances at him "Nothing wrong with that. I usually laugh at shit that i shouldn't," she answers, nonchalantly.

He nods with a smile, his eyes not leaving her as they walk. "You got a really cute accent. You British?"

"Yep," she answers.

"What were you doing over here?" He questions.

"I was only supposed to be here for two weeks. I was visiting my aunt. She moved over here years ago. Was always mithering me to come visit her. Everything kicked off quickly. I couldn't get a flight home."

Negan gives her a slightly pitiful look. "Jesus! That must fucking suck! Do you get homesick?"

"No.. not anymore," she replies with a solemn look.

"So what did you do before?" Negan asks.

"I'd rather not talk about before. No sense in reminiscing. Focus on the now, because that's all that matters," Rachel replies, vacantly.

He raises his eyebrow then nods. "Fair enough."

* * *

The trip to the sanctuary takes just over an hour. There's very little conversation on the way there. Mostly an uncomfortable silence. And Rachel, who's famous for rambling on and on, hates uncomfortable silences.

"We're here," Negan announces. "Home sweet, fucking home," he smiles.

She raises her head to what looks like a factory with lots of windows. It's the fence that catches her eye though. Walkers are strewn all around it, some in chains, others impaled on spikes. She's assuming it's some kind of deterrent. A large guy opens the gate as they drive through.

As Rachel exits the truck, she notices she's getting some pretty strange looks. She furrows her brow, then upon seeing her reflection in the truck window, realises that she's still covered in blood.

* * *

Upon entering they stand above what looks like a factory floor. Negan leans on the railing. There's about thirty people below. Negan takes Lucille and taps her on the railing twice. What she sees next gives her a million mixed emotions. Every head turns up to look at him. And every single one of them kneels before him. Negan glances at Rachel and grins. "We got someone new today. This is Rachel. Now, i don't normally make formal introductions, however, this beautiful little thing, just saved my life. So i want you ALL to show her the same respect, that you show me.. as you were!" And just like that, they go about their business once again. Negan turns to Rachel. "You see that? Respect!" Rachel is not sure how to respond, so she remains silent, nodding. "Come on. I'll show you to your room. Let you get yourself cleaned up and settled in," he says, walking towards the corridor. Rachel follows, still trying to process what she's just witnessed.

* * *

"Here you go. This one should do nicely," Negan smiles, opening the door.

She scans the room and can't deny that she's impressed. But then the chance to sleep in an actual bed these days is pretty impressive. There's a bed, chair, shelves with books on them, a television, even a fridge. "That fridge running?" She asks.

"Yeah. There's no food in it though. You must be pretty hungry? I'll have someone bring you something. Anything you need, just ask. I'll have someone bring you some clean clothes too."

"That's alright. I've got clean clothes in my backpack" she interrupts.

Negan smiles. "Fair enough. I'll have someone wash your clothes for you though. If you need me, for anything, my rooms just down the hall."

"Thanks," she replies.

Negan nods. "I'll leave you to get settled in. I'll see you tomorrow," and he leaves.

Rachel drops into the chair, arms resting either side. She can't remember the last time she felt this comfy. It's been a strange day. She has a lot to think about. _Who the hell is this guy?_ She wonders. _Why would so many people kneel to one man? I've fallen into a damn cult or some shit._ She rests a while, contemplating...


	3. Chapter 3

After a shower, some clean clothes, and a good nights sleep, Rachel is able to think a little more clearly. Negan may be crazy, but he's also a man with a lot of people at his disposal. Depending on whether she stayed or not, that made him a threat. She decided the best thing to do, was to scope the place out. Fit in for the time being until she figured the place out. That's if she could rely on her mouth to keep her out of trouble. She had a habit of saying, _exactly_ what she thought. And it had gotten her into trouble, many a time.

She hears a knock at the door. "Who is it?" She shouts, rising out of her chair.

"Erm.. Joey. Negan told me to bring you some food."

Rachel opens the door. An overly plump man stands there nervously carrying a tray.

"Hi, i'm Rachel," she smiles.

He blushes a little. "Hi, i'm Joey-,"

"Yeah i know. You just said that," she interrupts jokingly.

"Right, sorry," he says quietly. She takes the tray from him and places it on the side. Joey looks her over before she turns around. "Do you need any clean clothes?" Joey asks.

"No, i'm good. Someone already took my other clothes to be washed," Rachel replies, looking under the food cover. _Jesus christ, there's egg,_ she thinks, salivating a little.

"I just thought, maybe you'd prefer some jeans or something?" Joey interrupts.

Rachel turns to look at him, food cover in her hand. "Is there something wrong, with what i'm wearing?" She frowns.

"No.. of course not. I just thought you might be more comfortable, th.. that's all," he stutters.

"Relax, Joey. Jesus, you look like you're about to cry. I find skirts more practical, believe it or not. Especially out there. Allows for more movement, run faster and all that. Plus.. it's more hygienic, but i'll not gross you out talking about feminine hygiene," She says, giggling.

Joey relaxes a little. "Right, thanks for that," he nods. "Seeya," he says, leaving.

Rachel goes over to the tray. She'd never been a huge fan off eggs before, but holy crap! These smell good. Fresh salad as well. She eats like it's her last meal, savouring every piece.

With her stomach full, she digs through her backpack in search of a cigarette. She finds one right at the bottom, crumpled to pieces. "Shit!" She curses. Tossing it into the bin. She decides now's as good a time as any to explore the sanctuary.

* * *

Wandering down the halls, she gets the sense that this place is pretty gloomy. It's not somewhere she'd choose to live. But then again, she'd lived in worse. And it's not like you could afford to be picky. If somewhere was safe, then that's all that mattered.

Roaming around, talking to others, she learned that there was a points system. Those closest to Negan seemed to take whatever they wanted. Whilst those at the bottom struggled to earn enough points to eat. She didn't like it. She'd lived under a points system before, and it was always the arseholes who fared well.

Rachel takes a breather outside, observing the walkers around the fence.

She hears footsteps behind her. _Moustache guy_ , _no, his names Simon,_ she recalls.

"Hey!" Simon says, smiling.

"Hi," Rachel smiles.

"How you settling in?" Simon asks, sitting beside her on the step.

"Good thanks. I mean, it's weird. Going from, being on your own, to having so many people around you," Rachel replies.

"You can never have too many more the better," Simon states matter of factly.

Rachel nods. She thinks for a moment, then looks at Simon. "Why do you follow him?" She asks.

"The world needs people like Negan. The way it is now. You need rules. You don't have rules, then you got, all kinds of bad people, doing bad shit. People need rules to keep them in line, it's always been that way. Negan's a man of his word, i respect that," Simon answers.

"I noticed some women in the sanctuary. All dressed up to the nines. What's all that about?" Rachel questions.

Simon grins. "Those are Negan's wives."

She interrupts abruptly. "Wait! Did you just say wives? As in plural?"

Simon laughs. "Yeah, he has five in all. He takes care of them. Makes sure they have whatever it is they want. And in exchange, they're loyal to him."

"That's just.. weird," Rachel says stunned.

"Not really, it's a mutually beneficial agreement. Each of them is getting what they want out of each other," Simon explains.

"I suppose so. Still weird though," she remarks.

They sit in silence for a few moments, then Simon rises to his feet. "While you're here, i was meaning to ask if you wanted to help out tomorrow?" He asks, hands on hips.

"Sure. What do you need?" She asks, standing.

"We got a bridge needs fixing, not far from here. We use it often, so it needs doing. Job like that, makes a lot of noise. Attracts the dead. We need another lookout. I figured you'd be more than capable of watching our asses," he smiles.

Rachel nods. "sure, no problem."

"We're setting off at about 6am. Here, let me check your watch," he says, reaching for her wrist and bringing it up to his face. "You're an hour behind. You'll wanna reset that," he advises. Rachel nods, adjusting her watch. "Seeya first thing," Simon nods, walking off.

"Will do. Seeya," she replies.

She stands there for a while, leaning on the railing watching the walkers, then heads back inside.

* * *

Rachel sits comfortably in her room, her legs draped over the chair arm with a book in her lap. _If you ever looked at me once with what i know is in you, i would be your slave.._

A knock at the door startles her. "Who is it?" She calls.

"Negan."

She glances towards the door. "Door's open," she announces, folding the corner of her page.

Negan enters, smiling. She'd forgotten how nice his smile was. "Hey, beautiful," he smiles. His eyes go to the book in her lap. "What you reading?" He asks, amused.

"Wuthering Heights," she answers.

Negan sits on the coffee table in front of her, placing his Lucille on the table beside him. "I tried reading that once. Couldn't understand a fucking word they said. Any good?" He asks.

"I should hope so, i've read it a few times," she answers, smiling.

"I've never been one for reading. Too much of an impatient motherfucker. How you finding it here? Everyone making you feel welcome?" He asks.

Rachel adjusts herself, swinging her legs off the chair arm to face Negan. "Everyone's been nice. But then again, i'm useful, so why wouldn't they be?" _Careful Rachel.._ she thinks.

Negan frowns. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" He asks.

"Your points system. It's bullshit. Those closest to you flourish, whilst the guys at the bottom struggle to scrape enough to eat. You think that's fair?" She asks, accusingly.

Negan's smile falters. "You don't think people should earn what they take? No one's fucking starving here. But it's only right, that those who do more, reap the fucking benefits. You disagree?" He questions, not a trace of his signature smile to be seen.

"Why? What are you gonna do if i say yes?" She goads him, keeping a straight face.

Negan stares at her, gritting his teeth. Then as sudden as a light switch flicking off, his eyes light up as his face breaks into a smile. "You've got the wrong idea about me. You think i'd fucking hurt you for disagreeing with me? You're fucking wrong, sweetheart. In case you haven't noticed, the fucking world ended. People, need, rules. You don't fucking get something for doing fuck, fucking, all! You have to earn shit! These people don't like it, they can fucking leave whenever the fuck they want."

"What about your wives? Are they free to leave whenever they want?" Rachel asks.

Negan laughs, running a hand over his stubble. "You heard about them uh?"

"Yeah, and it's weird," she states.

"Hey, women have used their bodies to get what they want, since the dawn of fucking time. I ain't fucking forcing them to be my wives, i ain't fucking like that. Them being my wives, is completely voluntary. It's not like multiple wives is a new thing, muslims have-,"

"Oh please, you ain't no muslim, you're more like a poor mans Hugh Hefner. Negan, the Hugh fucking Hefner of the apocalypse!" She snorts.

Negan bursts out laughing, tears streaming down his face. "Oh fuck! Hugh Hefner. I fucking like you, sweetheart. I really fucking do. Seriously," he says, between trying to catch his breath.

"It wasn't supposed to be funny," she points out, but she can't help but smile. A giggle escapes her unwillingly.

"Listen, sweetheart. You've been here all of a fucking day. At least take some fucking time to get to know us. I know i'd like to get to know you better. That's for fucking sure," he says, with a smile. His eyes look her over as he licks his lips. She stares straight back, determined not to avert her gaze from his. "Any fucking hoo, i should let you get your head down. Simon tells me you're working with him in the morning. I'll see you tomorrow, sweetheart," he says, smiling as he gets up and leaves.

Rachel sits there for a few moments feeling irritated. She still can't read the guy, and it frustrates her. _Sod it!_ She thinks, and goes back to her book.


	4. Chapter 4

Rachel hadn't slept well. She'd been awake on and off, scolding herself mentally for letting her mouth run away with her in front of Negan. And when she had slept, she'd been plagued with bad dreams.

She makes her way outside, covering her mouth to hide a yawn.

Simon is already there, readying the truck. "Hey, Rach, you ready to go?" He asks, smiling.

"Ready as i'll ever be," she says.

"You're gonna be needing one of these," he says, gesturing her towards the back of the truck.

An array of guns are laid out. "I know you've got your arrows, but it doesn't hurt to have a backup, right? Pick whichever you want, theres ammo in that bag," he says.

She picks up a small revolver and loads it, tucking it into the belt of her skirt. She'd customized her belt to accommodate a medium sized knife, which hung from her left hip, and a small drawstring pouch, which hung on her right. She takes a handful of bullets and stores them in the pouch. She was grateful she'd had the sense to put on a long sleeved shirt over her vest, as there is a chill in the air.

"You can ride up front with me," Simon says.

"Hey, i called shotgun," a voice whinges from behind her.

"Well now you're not. So stop being such a pussy, and get in the back," Simon frowns.

"I don't mind getting in the back," Rachel offers.

"Just ignore David, he's an asshole," Simon replies, getting into the front seat. Rachel smiles, getting in beside him.

* * *

Rachel pulls her arrow from the walkers head. In spite of the noise, they've attracted little attention so far. She counts seven in all on her side of the road. There are three other lookouts, and eight saviors working on the bridge.

She checks her watch, 11.20am. Whatever her misgivings with the saviors, she can't doubt their dedication.

Movement in the distance to her left catches her eye. Two walkers. She waits for them to come closer, seeing no sense in prolonging her inevitable journey to collect her arrows. At a distance of about 60ft, she aims, her arrow going through the first walkers head. Her second arrow goes through the other walkers neck. "Crap!" She curses under her breath. Pulling another arrow from her quiver, she aims once again. This time she doesn't miss.

She collects her arrows, absently wiping them on her socks. "Rachel!" Someone shouts. She turns to see Simon and David. "David's gonna take over for twenty minutes, come get yourself something to eat," he says.

Rachel nods, following Simon.

* * *

She sits on the back of a pick up truck, legs swinging childishly as she eats a sandwich. Simon sits beside her, eating also. "You're doing good out there," he compliments her.

"It's been quiet, touch wood," she says, tapping her bow.

"Well, just remember what i said. If you see too many to handle on your own. Come running," Simon advises.

She nods. "God this sandwich is good. I never thought i'd eat bread again," she says, through mouthfuls.

Simon laughs. "Yeah, we've got some really good cooks at the sanctuary. Good thing too. I was never any good at cooking."

"Me neither," Rachel says, taking a gulp of water.

"So how long were you on your own out there?" Simon asks casually.

"Are you asking me that so you can relay it to Negan?" She questions, raising her brow.

Simon gapes theatrically. "I can't believe you'd think that? You really hurt my feelings just now," he jokes.

Rachel giggles. "Well i apologize, Simon. I didn't realise you were such a sensitive soul," she jests. Simon smiles, then continues eating. "About three weeks," Rachel starts. "I'm not entirely sure. Time passes differently when you're on your own. I've been on my own a few times since this started. Nothing seems to last," she says, staring in the distance.

Simon gazes at her thoughtfully. "That's not true," he begins. Rachel turns to him. "You're lasting," he says.

Rachel nods in agreement. "True, touch wood," she adds, smiling. Simon laughs.

* * *

Rachel checks her watch again, 2.30pm. She takes a drink of water, and splashes a little on her face and chest. It's gotten hot, and she's sweating profusely.

Simon came to her thirty minutes ago to say they'd be done in about two hours. She's relieved to say the least, as the heat is killing her. But now, time seems to be dragging.

She takes down a walker in the distance then strolls over to collect her arrow.

Making her way back, she wipes sweat from her brow with a rolled up sleeve. Something in the distance catches her eye. She squints, sweat stinging her eyes. _Walkers!_ About a dozen of them. All heading in the direction of the saviors working on the bridge. "Simon!" She shouts, running. But with the noise, they fail to hear her. Rachel drops her bow and reaches for the revolver.

Simon, completely oblivious to the danger behind him, feels something grab at his arm. He turns quickly. "Shit!" He yells, as the walker opens it's mouth, ready to sink it's teeth in, mere inches away. Simon hears a gunshot. A bullet goes straight through the walkers head. He sees Rachel aiming her gun. Simon draws his own gun, shouting at the others. Rachel takes out two more in quick succession. The other saviors are on board now, shooting at the walkers. One guy however, isn't so lucky. A walker surprises him from behind and takes a chunk out of his arm. Simon shoots it in the head. The guy grabs at his arm, blood pouring from the wound.

* * *

It doesn't take them long to dispose of the walkers, it's over in less than two minutes. Simon reacts quickly. "Chris!" He shouts, running towards the guy who got bit. Rachel follows.

"Don't let me die! Oh.. please.. don't let me die!" Chris cries, hysterically.

Simon quickly removes his belt, placing it above Chris's elbow. "Get me something sharp!" He orders.

Rachel grabs a machete and runs over to Simon.

"Oh, no no no no. Not my arm, man!" Chris whimpers.

"We have to," Simon says, and he brings down the machete in one fell swoop.

Chris lets out a blood curdling scream.

Rachel quickly removes her shirt and wraps it around the stump, applying pressure. Chris sobs. "You're gonna be okay," Rachel assures him, even though she knows no such thing.

"David! Get the truck, you and Jay! Get him back to the sanctuary!" Simon yells.

David runs to the truck and brings it round, they quickly lift Chris into the back, Rachel still applying pressure to his wound. Jay takes Rachels place and gets in the back with Chris. David drives off in the direction of the sanctuary, which isn't far, fortunately.

Simon stands, breathing heavily. He looks over at Robert in the distance. Robert was supposed to be the lookout for the stretch of road where the walkers came through. "Where were you?" Simon demands.

Robert looks sheepishly at Simon. "I.. i went to take a piss, i was only gone a minute, i swear," he babbles.

Simons face contorts in anger, he runs over to Robert, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt. "You stupid fuck!" He screams. He lets go of Roberts collar and punches him square in the nose. His nose splatters. Simon is far from done, swinging at Robert relentlessly. Robert falls onto his back, and Simon continues to kick and stomp. "YOU! STUPID! FUCK!"

Rachel runs over. "Simon! Stop it! You're gonna kill him!" No one else seems concerned enough to stop it. She reaches Simon and drags him off. "Simon! Stop it!" She yells. His face is lit with fury, his breathing heavy. Rachel looks him in the eye. "That's enough. Let Negan deal with him," she speaks softly, attempting to calm him down.

"He nearly got us all killed! Cos he's too stupid to hold in a piss! Chris just lost his damn arm!" Simon argues.

"I know. But it's done now. We should let Negan deal with him," she reasons.

Simons anger slowly dissipates. He nods. "Okay. Everyone pack up," he orders, composing himself.

"We should finish the job," Rachel says.

Simon glances at her. "It'll take double the time without Chris. And we'd lose another man on the job, because we need another lookout. Robert's in no fit state, and i wouldn't trust that asshole anyway," he says, glancing in Roberts direction.

"I don't mind staying longer. We should finish the job. As long as everyone else is alright with that?" She asks.

"She's right, we should finish the job," comes a voice from behind her.

"You sure you can manage it, Gareth?" Simon asks.

"Yeah. Probably take us another four hours, but i'm alright with that. Saves coming out again tomorrow," he reasons.

Simon contemplates for a moment. "Alright, lets get this shit done! John, you're on lookout duty. Back to it everyone," Simon orders, a smile returning to his face. Rachel nods, heading back to the road. Simon puts a hand on her shoulder. she turns to him. "Thanks for saving my ass. Again!" He smiles.

Rachel smiles back. "No problem."


	5. Chapter 5

"Why the fuck is he not dead yet?" Negan asks confused.

Simon shifts his feet uncomfortably.

They'd gotten back an hour ago, just before dark. Robert was languishing in a cell, and Negan was less than impressed.

Negan and Simon stand in the corridor near Roberts cell. "That stupid, fucking, prick, cost Chris his arm. He almost cost you and all the others your lives! So tell me. Why, in the holy fuck! Is he still breathing?" Negan demands to know.

"Rachel.. she stopped me," Simon answers.

Negan throws him a bemused look. "Rachel, is barely five two, and probably one ten piss wet through? You're telling me, she overpowered you? Cos that's fucking hilarious," Negan smirks.

"I wasn't sure how you wanted me to go about it? I was smashing his face in, and she intervened, tried to calm me down and shit. And.. i do technically owe her, twice over. She suggested leaving it to you to decide what to do with him. Thought that was best all round. And.. if i'm being honest, i don't want to scare her off. We need her. The whole time she was out there, she never complained once, she just did what she was told to do, and, it was her idea to keep on working. She's made of tough stuff, we saw that when we met her," Simon answers, honestly.

Negan thinks for a moment. "I hear you. I don't want her to go either, she's too damn useful. She's fucking soft though, that could get in the way, obviously, otherwise, Robert would be dead. Leave him in there for now, i need to fucking think this over," he frowns.

"Sure thing," Simon nods. They walk down the corridor together towards Negan's room.

"You seem to have a bit of a soft spot for Rachel. You sweet on her?" Negan jests.

"No.. well, a little, i mean she's hot right?" Simon remarks.

"Fuck yeah she's hot! Shit, i wanted to fuck her damn brains out when we first met her!" Negan grins.

Simon smiles, nodding. "Yeah well, i know you like her, so i wouldn't go trying anything," Simon assures him.

Negan stops and puts a hand on Simons shoulder. "See that's what i fucking love about you, Simon. Fucking loyalty at its finest. That's why you're my right hand man!" He says, grinning. "Come on, come get yourself a drink," Negan offers, opening the double doors.

* * *

"So he's gonna be alright?" Rachel asks Dr. Carson.

"The bleeding has stopped, and with proper care, he'll be fine," Carson nods.

"Well that's good news," she smiles.

"Indeed," Carson replies, going about his business.

 _He's a cheerful bugger,_ she thinks.

Rachel leaves the infirmary, heading down the hall. "Hey! Rachel!" She turns. "I'm Gareth.. from the bridge," he says.

Rachel smiles. "Course you are, i remember," she assures him.

Gareth laughs briefly. "There's a bunch of us playing cards, if you wanna join?" He offers, shyly.

 _He's cute,_ she thinks. "I appreciate you asking, but i'm pretty tired. Probably get my head down soon," She says.

"Okay, that's fine. Some other time maybe?" He asks.

"Definitely," Rachel nods. "Seeya," She adds.

"Seeya," Gareth repeats, watching her walk away.

 _Damn he had a cute smile.. not as cute as Negan's though._ She scolds herself mentally for thinking that. She's starting to warm to some of the people at the sanctuary. She's already decided though, that whatever Negan does next regarding Robert, will result in whether she stays or leaves.

She walks past Negan's quarters, just as Simon's leaving. "Hey, Simon," She says, continuing on to her room.

"Oh, hey, Negan wants to speak with you," he informs her, trying to catch her up.

Rachel sighs, feeling tired. "Where is he?" She asks.

"In his room, just knock on," he says, pointing at the double doors.

Rachel nods. "Sure."

She walks through the doors. Three of what she's guessing are Negan's wives are lounging in a large room. One of them is leaning against a bar, a glass in her hand. Rachel continues on to Negan's room and knocks on.

"Come in!" Negan shouts.

She enters, scanning the room 's a large four poster bed to her left, three large windows to her right, and a seating area.

Negan is sitting on a leather sofa, minus his jacket and scarf. "Hey, beautiful, take a seat," he says, gesturing to the seat beside him.

She opts for one of the chairs instead.

"Can i get you a drink?" He offers.

"No, i'm good thanks," she replies.

"You sure?" He offers again.

"I'm sure," she answers.

He smiles. "Simon tells me you did good out there today," Negan starts.

"I just did the job i was asked to do," Rachel says.

"Yeah, well. If it were that fucking simple, Chris wouldn't have lost his goddamn arm," Negan says, looking away briefly, his lip curling downwards momentarily.

"What are you gonna do with Robert?" She asks bluntly. Negan looks at her, biting on his lip. _I wish he wouldn't do that,_ she thinks.

"What would you do with him?" He asks, sitting forward, his hands clasped together.

Rachel frowns for a moment. "He's already had the shit kicked out of him, i'd leave it at that. But that's just me," she shrugs.

"Even after almost costing you your life?" Negan asks, bewildered.

"Don't get me wrong, he's a stupid cunt! I would have punched him myself if Simon hadn't gotten there first. Doesn't mean i want him to die though. He may have almost cost us our lives today, but maybe he saves them tomorrow," she answers.

Negan looks at her thoughtfully, smiling. "What did you do before all this?" He asks her.

Rachel's face drops a little. "I'd rather not talk about before," she says.

He eyes her sympathetically. "Alright, what about the people you were with before us?" Negan asks.

"They were good people, but it didn't get them anywhere. They're probably dead," Rachel answers, blankly.

"Did you have someone in your group?" Negan asks.

Rachel looks far off, then looks at Negan. "No."

He laughs. "Come on? I'm not fucking believing for one fucking second, that someone as cute as you, didn't have someone," Negan remarks in disbelief.

Rachel smiles. "Believe whatever you want," she suggests.

Negan sighs and rolls his eyes. "What the fuck ever. I want you working with me tomorrow," he says.

"Okay. What we doing?" Rachel asks.

"I got a few errands to run, you can watch my ass for me. Don't worry, i'll be watching yours, that's for fucking sure," he says, his eyes looking at her greedily.

She shifts a little in her seat. "I should go get my head down," Rachel says.

"Sure, i'll see you about seven," he smiles.

She can feel his eyes on her as she leaves. She's not sure what makes her more uncomfortable, that, or the fact that she likes it a little.

* * *

After a surprisingly sound sleep, Rachel meets Negan outside.

"Hey there, beautiful. You sleep alright?" Negan asks, grinning.

"I did actually, must've been knackered from yesterday," she answers.

"Yeah, well. You worked your damn ass off, it'll do that to you," he says.

"So where we heading?" She asks.

"One of my outposts, it's about an hours drive," Negan answers, heading towards the truck.

"One of? How many outposts do you have?" She questions, a little surprised.

"A few," he smiles, getting in the truck.

She gets in beside him. Her skirt rides up a little and she catches him looking. "Do you mind?" She says, frowning.

"Come on, i'm a guy. Any red blooded male would do the same," he reasons, smiling.

* * *

They'd been driving for about ten minutes, and Negan had been talking almost non-stop.

"I tell you, it's slim fucking pickens out there. Getting harder and harder to find shit. I got guys-,"

"You like the sound of your own voice, dont you?" She cuts in.

Negan stares at her, his mouth agape, frowning. "Wow! That's fucking harsh! Maybe i won't say another fucking word until we get to the outpost?" He suggests, offended.

"Don't make promises you can't keep," she says, rolling her eyes.

"Listen, sweetheart, just cos i don't have a fucking stick rammed up my ass like you, doesn't-,"

"Whoa, what's that supposed to mean?" She interrupts.

"Cos you're all fucking tight lipped. Anytime i ask you a damn question, you go all weird," he points out.

"No i don't. I just don't see the point in raking up the past," she retaliates, frowning. "You're so annoying. Next time you ask me to work with you. Remind me to say no," she adds, staring out of the window crossly.

Negan stares at her, a smile creeping onto his face. "You know. I don't let fucking nobody, get away with talking to me like that. But i'm gonna let it slide. You know why?" He asks.

"No, but i'm sure you're going to enlighten me," she replies.

"Because it's building tension. A whole fuck load of it," Negan smiles.

"What the hell are you talking about?" She asks, confused.

"Oh come the fuck on. You know what i'm fucking talking about," he says.

"I have no idea actually," she says sarcastically.

Negan stares at her, licking his lips. "Fuck yeah you do, we're just one fucking fight away from screwing each others brains out."

Rachel furrows her brow. "Were you on meds before?"

Negan laughs. "Joke all you want, sweetheart. But i can guarantee, that we'll be fucking before the month gives out."

She stares at him. "You're insane," she scowls, then looks away, staring out of the window.

* * *

They arrive at the outpost, greeted by two armed men out front. They both kneel upon seeing Negan. "As you were," Negan says.

One of the men has a black notebook, and Negan reads through it.

"Are you, Rachel?" The other guy asks.

"Yeah," she smiles.

"I'm Wayne, Simon was telling me about you," he smiles.

"Good things i hope?" She jests.

"Yeah, he wouldn't shut up. You any good with those arrows?" He asks.

She looks around, and sees a walker about 100ft away. Rachel takes her bow from her shoulder and draws an arrow. She aims for a moment, then releases. The walker drops.

"Wow! I'll take that as a yes," he says, impressed.

He walks with her as she collects her arrow.

Negan watches in the distance.

"So you think you're gonna stay at the sanctuary?" He asks.

"I think so, it's as good a place as any," she answers.

"Maybe i'll see you around then?" He smiles, flirtatiously.

"Maybe," she smiles. _Jesus, all the guys here are just big glands!_ She thinks.

He lights a cigarette. "You want one?" He offers.

"No she fucking doesn't," Negan interrupts. "It's a disgusting habit," he says, resting Lucille on his shoulder.

Rachel frowns. "I can speak for myself thank you very much. I'm good thanks, trying to quit," she smiles at Wayne.

"You sure i can't tempt you back to the dark side?" Wayne jokes.

"You fucking deaf?" Negan asks, frowning. Wayne looks at Negan nervously, shakes his head, then walks away.

Rachel looks at Negan, frowning. "Well that was rude," she says.

"I know right. Fucking should learn to take no for a fucking answer," Negan says, glancing at Wayne as he walks away.

"Not him, you," she says, annoyed.

"Me?" Negan says, placing his hand on his chest.

"You don't answer for me, it's not your place. Next time, mind your business," she says, walking back to the truck.

Negan sulks, his face that of a petulant child. "So where we heading?" Rachel asks, as Negan gets in the drivers seat.

"One of them said they saw a small town about an hours drive from here. Gonna go check it out, if that's alright with you of course?" He sulks.

 _Jesus!_ She thinks. "It's fine," she answers, looking out of the window.


	6. Chapter 6

They'd been driving for about ten minutes. Negan hadn't said a word since they'd left the outpost, a stony look on his face.

The silence is deafening. Rachel drums her fingers on the passenger door. She leans forward, opening the glove box. "Let's see what we've got in here?" She says, rifling through. Negan's eyes remain on the road. She pulls out three CD's. "What the fuck?" She says, a look of disgust on her face. "Shania Twain, Leanne Rimes.. i can't even pronounce that last one," she says, tossing them disappointedly back into the glove box.

A smile momentarily creeps at the corner of Negan's mouth. "What kind of music do you like?" Negan asks.

Rachel starts a little. "Mostly indie rock. I'd kill for some Arctic Monkeys right now," she says, brooding.

Negan stares at her, confused. "Who the fuck are the Arctic Monkeys?" He asks. Rachel giggles. "What?" Negan asks, looking baffled.

She looks him in the eye, smiling. "Nothing," she chuckles.

His face softens, his trademark grin returning. "Well whoever the fuck they are, i've never heard of them," Negan says.

"So what's the plan?" Rachel asks.

"Check the town out, see how many dead fucks there are. If there's too many to handle, or too much shit for the truck, i'll radio for more men. No fucking sense in putting a shitload of my men on this. Place is probably fucking picked clean anyway," Negan replies.

* * *

"Jesus, you weren't kidding," Rachel says, reading a sign that says, _Population 298._ They see the town in the distance.

Negan stops the truck. "We've got a good view of the town from up here," he says, taking a pair of binoculars from the glove box and exiting the truck.

Rachel scans the town below. White houses with picket fences, a couple of convenience stores, a big white church with a steeple.

She goes through her backpack, finding her own binoculars.

A few walkers roam around here and there. _Not too many to handle,_ she thinks. She sees the school, zooming in to get a better look. _Jackpot!_ She thinks. "The school might be our best bet," Rachel says.

Negan looks at her. "How's that?" He asks.

"The doors are chained, and there's movement inside. Walkers from the looks of it.. in fact.. it's crawling with them," she says, still scanning the school.

"What makes that our best bet?" Negan asks.

She looks at Negan. "Maybe it was chained up early on? To keep the walkers in? If that's the case, then it's probably untouched," she answers.

"See that, is why i fucking wanted you with me, i knew you'd be fucking smart as hell," Negan grins.

"So what's the plan?" She asks, smiling.

Negan bites his lip, deep in thought. "I'll radio for some more men, we can get the fuck down there while we wait for them, take out some dead fucks," he smiles.

* * *

They wander through the streets, Rachel holding her bow, Negan swinging his Lucille.

"Walker," she whispers, drawing her bow.

"Allow me. Lucille hasn't tasted blood in a while, and she, is, thirsty," Negan interrupts. He moves towards the walker, and swings Lucille with his right hand. The walker drops to the ground, its head a bloody mess. Negan turns to Rachel, grinning from ear to ear.

They walk side by side. Rachel contemplates asking why he calls his bat Lucille, then decides against it.

Two more walkers ramble around the corner. Rachel draws her bow, taking them both out in quick succesion.

They leave the houses for now, focusing instead on clearing the streets of the dead. There aren't many, but Rachel knows there may be more lurking inside the buildings.

"So did you do this sort of stuff with your last group?" Negan asks, swinging Lucille as he walks.

"Sometimes. But mostly i went out hunting," Rachel answers.

"You're a hunter?" Negan asks, surprised.

"Not the best, i'm sure, but yeah, good enough to keep a lot of people fed," she says.

"Well that's just fucking awesome! You're multi-fucking-talented," Negan smiles, impressed.

"Well, you have to learn that stuff don't you. Keeping people fed is important. People get hungry, they start to turn on you," Rachel says.

"I fucking hear that. We have people go out hunting, none of them can track though. Can you track?" Negan asks.

"I can, a little. It's hard. Most people who track have been doing it all their lives. I've only had a year, so i'm learning all the time. I'd actually really appreciate it if you gave me some time to go out hunting, it's important to me," she says.

"Absolutely. The more hunters, the better. So how did you learn to hunt?" Negan asks, breaking away for a moment to take out a walker.

"First group i was with, a guy there saved my life. I was wandering through the woods, no, correct that, i was lost in the woods. Hadn't eaten in days, then i came across a few walkers. I tried to run, but i was so tired and weak. Then i fucking tripped. One of the walkers fell on me, and i thought that was it, thought i was a goner! Then this guy comes out of nowhere, shoots it in the head, then takes out the others. I passed out. Next thing i know, i'm lying in a bed. Safe. He said, i was the sorriest thing he'd seen," Rachel smiles, reminiscing. "So he took pity on me, and taught me most of everything i know. Not like he had a choice though, i followed him around everywhere, annoyed the shit out of him," she laughs.

"I'm pretty fucking sure he enjoyed you following him around, sweetheart, i know i would," Negan grins.

Rachel rolls her eyes. "It wasn't like that, Jesus! Is that all you think about?" She says.

"Pretty fucking much," Negan replies, licking his lips.

She smiles. "Walkers," she says, gesturing ahead. There's four. She takes out three with her bow, purposely leaving one for Negan, not wanting him to feel useless.

* * *

Negan and Rachel head back to the truck just as another arrives. Three saviors exit the truck.

"What the fuck? Didn't i say send as many men as you can?" Negan says, frowning.

"There's more on the way, boss, should be here in about an hour," a bald headed man replies.

"Maybe we should wait till the others get here?" Rachel suggests.

"Fuck that! Let's get this shit done," Negan says. "Anyone got any ideas how to get those dead fucks out of the school?" Negan asks.

"I say we just get in there, shoot the place up," Gareth suggests.

"That's a stupid fucking idea! Unless that is, you plan on fucking dying today?" Negan says, annoyed.

"Sorry," Gareth says, nervously.

"We need to lure them out," Rachel says.

Negan turns to her. "How?" He asks.

"Noise. Create as much noise as we can at the back of the school. That'll give us time to cut the chains, open those main doors at the front."

Negan nods, contemplating. "Then what?" He asks.

Rachel thinks for a moment. "We could use one of the trucks, put the music on full blast. They should be drawn to it like a moth to a flame, just keep the truck moving, lead them into the middle of nowhere, or whatever?" Rachel suggests.

Negan smiles, briefly stroking his chin, where the beginnings of a beard is starting to show. "Now that, is a fucking good idea, you see that, Gareth? That, is what a good fucking idea sounds like. Take fucking note," Negan frowns. "Right. Let's get this fucking shit started. Arat and Gareth, you make some noise at the back of the school. Those dead fucks smash through the windows, open fire and retreat. John, you cut the chains once they've cleared. Rachel and i will lure them away in the truck. While we're gone, you guys take care of any stragglers. Got it?" He asks. They all nod in unison. "Good. Let's get fucking to it!" Negan orders.

* * *

Negan and Rachel wait in the car, the engine running.

"Please tell me we have something to play, other than Shania Twain?" Rachel pleads.

Negan smiles. "I got some CD's from the other truck, take a fucking gander," he offers, opening the glove box.

Rachel rifles through, not feeling very hopeful. Her eyes light up. "Now that's more like it!" She smiles.

Negan looks over. "Jimi Hendrix. You like him?" Negan asks.

"Obviously! He's the greatest guitar player ever!" She smiles, taking the disc out. "I'm borrowing this when we're done," she adds.

Negan smiles. "You know.. that's mine," he says.

Rachel stares at him. "Really? Well you have good taste in music, i'll give you that.. i'm still borrowing it though," she says.

They hear noises coming from the back of the school. "I hope those dead fucks don't break through the glass, it'll totally fucking ruin the plan," Negan says.

"They shouldn't. If they do though, we'll just have to think on our feet," Rachel assures him.

John cuts the chain holding the doors, then makes his way to the back of the school.

"Right motherfuckers! Let's get this show started!" Negan cheers, winding down the windows and pressing play on the stereo. Purple Haze blasts from the speakers.

Purple Haze, turns into All along the watchtower, before the walkers being to exit through the main doors.

Negan taps his hands on the steering wheel in time to the music. Rachel leans her arm on the door, tapping her fingers. She glances over at Negan, who's mouthing the words. _Cute,_ she thinks, smiling. She finds herself feeling strangely aroused, pushing her thighs together in the hope that it will calm the heat that's building. She's glad Negan is focused on the doors, or he might see her blushing.

As the walkers come closer, Negan slowly accelerates. The dead follow. Close to a hundred, Rachel reckons.

"It's fucking working!" Negan shouts over the music.

"How far we taking them out?" Rachel asks loudly.

"Not far, just a few miles. I've got men on the road ahead. They'll take over, keep leading them out. Not enough gas in this truck for us to see it through. We can race on ahead then veer off, leave them to it!" Negan answers.

As true as his word, three miles later Rachel spots some cars ahead. They continue on at the same pace until they reach level with the other cars. Then they speed on ahead, turning at the first left they see. "We'll head back to the school, see if all this was worth fucking while?" Negan smiles.


	7. Chapter 7

Negan and Rachel drive to the town once again. There are a lot more people there this time, and a lot more trucks.

"You find anything good?" Negan asks John.

"We've gone through a few of the houses, some good stuff. Mostly canned foods," he answers.

"Good. Anyone been inside the school yet?" Negan asks.

"No. I thought you might wanna look through there yourself," he replies.

Negan smiles. "Alright. Come on, Rachel," Negan gestures.

They enter through the main doors, just the two of them.

"Why are we doing this alone?" Rachel asks quietly, bow in hand.

"Because we're fucking badasses. And, i like being alone with you," he grins, biting his lip.

Rachel glances at him briefly, then laughs under her breath. "Do you think we got them all?" Rachel asks about the walkers.

"Probably fucking not, so we should be careful," Negan advises, whispering.

They make their way down the hall. The stench is stifling, and even though they'd both gotten used to it by now, their noses crinkle in disgust.

"Holy fucking fuck! It smells like the fucking devils asshole in here!" Negan remarks.

"They must have been here for a while, that's a good sign," she says, grimacing.

They move from class to class, carefully and quietly, making sure the area is clear.

"We'll leave the cafeteria till last," Negan says.

They make their way to the second floor through a set of double doors, moving slowly up the stairs.

Rachel's bow at the ready, they open the doors to the second floor, and a wave of putrid flesh hits them both.

"Jesus fucking Christ!" Negan says in disgust, his hand covering his nose and mouth.

Rachel turns, facing the way they came, her hand mimicking Negan's. She places her bow over her shoulder and leans forward against the wall, trying to compose herself.

Negan walks over to her, placing a hand gently on her shoulder. "You okay?" He asks sincerely.

Rachel nods. "Just need a minute," she answers, the words muffled under her hand. He takes a step back, allowing her some space. She takes her hand from her mouth. "I should stop being such a pussy right?" She asks.

"Right," Negan smiles sympathetically.

She turns to him smiling. "Let's get to it then."

* * *

The source of the smell becomes clear.

Three of the classrooms are filled with rotten corpses.

They only enter one. Most of the dead are children, some of them curled up under their desks.

Rachel clenches her jaw. Her eyes begin to brim with tears. She wipes them before they can fall. Negan catches sight of this, turning away quickly so she isn't aware. "What happened here?" She asks.

Negan crouches near one of the corpses, picking up a paper cup from the floor. "Mass suicide's my guess," he answers. He rises, showing her the cup. "These are all over the fucking place, must have done a fucking Jim Jones. Whoever did this, knew enough to take care of them after, make sure they didn't come back," he says, throwing the cup absently away.

"Why would someone do that?" She asks, tears brimming once again.

"Why do people do fucking anything these days?" Negan says. They stand in silence, scanning the room.

"You think they knew? The children?" She wonders sadly.

"Probably fucking not," he answers. "Come on, let's get the fuck out of here," he says, frowning.

* * *

They enter the cafeteria, the smell of upstairs gradually leaving their noses.

They head for the kitchen.

"You hear that?" Negan whispers.

"Yeah," Rachel replies, readying her bow.

A legless walker moans at them, no doubt pleased to smell fresh meat. Negan caves it's head in with Lucille.

They continue on to a store room.

Negan bangs on the door with Lucille. Moans come from within. He nods at Rachel, holding the door handle. She nods in reply, standing a few feet from the door, drawing her bow. Negan opens the door quickly, standing to one side. Five walkers pour out, rambling towards Rachel. She takes three with her arrows, Negan taking the other two with Lucille.

Negan bangs on the door again, silence ensues. "I think that's it," Rachel says.

"You got a torch?" Negan asks.

Rachel digs through her backpack. "Here," she says, handing him her torch.

It's a large storage room. Rows and rows of shelves, all fully stocked with tins. Large sacks of flour and rice.

"Fucking jackpot!" Negan grins.

Rachel's face lights up, the massacre upstairs forgotten briefly. "That's a lot of food," she smiles.

"Fuck yeah it is!" He says. Negan turns to her. "You feel like celebrating, sweetheart?" He asks, licking his lips.

She looks at him in disbelief. "Really?" Rachel says.

"Fuck yeah!" He smiles, his eyes burning into hers.

"I don't think so," she answers.

"That doesn't sound like a no," he says, moving closer to her. "How about just a kiss?" He suggests.

Rachel stares up at him, furrowing her eyebrows. She stands on her toes, placing a hand on his left shoulder. Her mouth goes to his ear, his bristle tickling the side of her face. _Christ he smells good,_ she thinks. "If you wanted someone to kiss, you should have brought one of your wives," she whispers, her mouth brushing against his ear lobe. She leans back on her heels, ready to leave.

Negan grabs her upper arm, pulling her close again. "They're not as fun as you, baby," he whispers in her ear.

 _Fuck!_ She thinks, as she feels his breath on her. It gives her shivers, and she's pretty sure he's well aware. "Tough!" She whispers back, smiling. He releases her arm, a frustrated look on his face. "Come on, let's get the fuck out of here," she smiles.

He watches her leave. "I'm so gonna fuck her brains out," he mutters under his breath, adjusting his manhood.

* * *

"Come on! Let's get this shit on the fucking road! It's gonna be dark soon!" Negan orders.

His men are loading the last of the supplies into one of the trucks.

Rachel is talking to the only other woman there, Arat. "There was more guns than we thought there would be," Arat says.

"I wouldn't have thought you'd find anything like that in a place like this. Seems kinda churchy," Rachel replies.

"You'd be surprised," Arat says. A horn honks. "I'll see you back at the sanctuary," Arat adds, heading for the truck.

"Seeya," Rachel calls.

"Come on, beautiful. We need to hit the road!" Negan shouts from the truck.

Rachel goes to the driver's side, where Negan is already sitting. "I wanna drive," Rachel says.

Negan looks up at her, smiling. "Sure," he says, exiting the truck. He watches her get into the drivers seat, then closes the door for her.

* * *

"So that guy you were talking about?" Negan says suddenly.

They had been driving for about ten minutes, and Rachel had thought it was strange that he hadn't said a word.

"What about him?" Rachel asks, keeping her eyes on the road.

"Were you together?" He asks.

"No. It wasn't like that. I loved him, but not like that. He was more like family.. well, i'm saying that, but i did try to take things further once," she smiles.

"Really? Please give me all the filthy fucking details," Negan grins.

"There are no filthy details. I tried to kiss him once, and he turned me down.. politely of course. Said i was more like a sister to him," she answers.

"You have got to be fucking joking!" Negan says, in utter disbelief.

"Nope, that's how it was," she assures him.

"Dude must have been bat shit crazy to refuse you!" Negan states.

"I'm not the holy grail, Negan," Rachel points out.

"Yes you fucking are," he smiles, licking his lips. She glances at him, smiling, then rolls her eyes.

"Did he die?" Negan asks. Rachel's face is solemn. "You know what. Fucking forget that. I'm just running my fucking mouth. I do that a lot," Negan says.

"I've noticed," Rachel grins. Negan laughs. They drive for another minute in silence. "He did die. I'd rather not talk about it too much though," Rachel says.

Negan nods. "Sure. I get that, what was his name?" He asks, softly.

"Merle," she answers.


	8. Chapter 8

Two weeks had passed since the school run.

Rachel was settling in quite nicely at the sanctuary. And with Negan agreeing to be lenient on Robert, she'd decided she was going to give this place a fair chance.

Rachel sits at a table with four other saviors. Cigarette smoke fills the room. She has a set of cards in one hand, and a bottle of beer in the other. Three of the players had folded, and the game was now between Rachel, and a savior named Timmy.

"Call," Rachel says. "Let's see what you've got?" She asks, smiling.

Timmy lays his cards down. "Four of a kind," he smirks. "Lets see what you got?"

Rachel lays her cards down smugly. "Straight flush," she grins.

"What the hell!" Timmy yells disappointed, slapping his hand frustratedly on the table.

"Don't be such a pussy," Simon laughs, swigging his beer.

"I believe this is mine," Rachel grins, grabbing a bottle of whiskey from the middle of the table.

"Wait wait," Timmy says, waving his hands. "At least give me a chance to win it back?" He pleads.

Rachel laughs, taking a sip of her beer. "Alright, we'll play one more game," She says.

They play several more times, resulting in Timmy winning back his whiskey twice, only to lose it again on the last game.

"Ahh shit!" Timmy shouts, tossing his cards on the table.

"Aww, don't be so sad, Timmy, here," she says, opening the bottle of whiskey. "We can share," she offers. "We should play a drinking game. You know any good ones?" She asks.

"Seven eleven doubles?" Gareth suggests.

Simon laughs. "Simple enough, i'm already fucking steaming as it is though."

"I've never heard of it?" Rachel says.

"It's easy," Simon starts. "First player rolls the dice, if you get seven, eleven or a double, you choose a player to take a drink. Then you keep rolling till they finish their drink. You get a seven eleven or double before they finish drinking, the drinker has to take another drink," he explains.

"I'm in," Rachel nods.

"Count me in. I don't have to be up in the morning," Arat smiles.

Simon rolls first, getting a double four. "Gareth," he grins.

"Aww man, i knew you'd pick me," he sulks.

Gareth knocks back the whiskey. Luckily, Simon doesn't roll another seven eleven or double.

Rachel rolls the dice. "Double four," she smiles. "Simon."

"I'll show you how it's done," he grins, picking up the glass.

Rachel rolls fast. "Would you look at that! We have a seven!" She cheers.

Simon takes another drink as Rachel rolls again, this time Simon is fortunate.

Next is Timmy. "Double three mother fuckers!" He laughs. "Rachel."

Rachel ends up having three drinks in a row.

* * *

Two bottles of whiskey, and god knows how many beers later, they're all absolutely hammered. Their laughter echos all around the sanctuary. Rachel at this point, has taken up smoking once again, too drunk to refuse otherwise.

"I'm sooo gonna regret this tomommow.. wait.. tomommow? Is that right?" She slurs, a cigarette hanging from her mouth.

"Hmm," Simon murmurs, his head lolling forwards.

"I gotta go to bed before i puke everywhere," Arat says, stumbling a little as she stands. "Night," She waves absently.

Rachel and Simon wave. "Night," Rachel says.

Gareth and Timmy are both passed out. Gareth resting his head on the table, and Timmy leant back against his chair. Timmy is snoring quite loudly. Simon holds Timmy's nose for a few seconds until Timmy absently slaps his hand and turns his head. Rachel and Simon laugh for a good five minutes.

"Shit, i need to get some shut eye," Simon says, rising out of his seat. "Seeya tomommow," He laughs.

"Tomommow!" She points at him, laughing her head off.

Rachel sits a while, her head rolling around. She rests her head on her hand, her elbow on the table. She sleeps.. for about 30 seconds, until a thud wakes her. It's her face, landing on the table. "Ow! What the fuck?" She moans. The other's don't wake, well away by now. She touches her nose, it's bleeding. "Ohh noo! Don't be broke!" She slurs to herself. She stands, and the room begins to spin. Rachel holds onto the table, attempting to steady herself. She stumbles over to a mirror on the wall, inspecting her nose. It's no good though, she can't see straight. "Keep still!" She shouts at the mirror. The only thing she can see, is that quite a lot of blood is coming out of her nose. Her mouth and chin are covered, little droplets fall from her chin onto her chest.

* * *

She's decided that the best thing to do, is to have another drink. The only place she knows for sure there's alcohol, is Negan's headquarters, so she heads there. She's all over the place. It'd be quite comical if there were anyone awake to see it. She goes down the corridors like a ping pong ball, stumbling from one side to the other. She stops and turns around on several occasions, convinced she's being followed, not realising it's her own footsteps she can hear. "Who's that?" She shouts into thin air.

She reaches Negan's headquarters, attempting to be as quiet as a drunk person can be, which isn't very quiet at all. Rachel opens the double doors. It's dark, everyone's down for the night. She stumbles over to the bar. Rather than go around the bar, drunk logic tells her to climb over. She grabs onto the bar, bringing her knee up onto a stool. She brings her other knee up onto the bar, kicking the stool away in the process. "Shhh!" She stresses, kneeling on all fours atop the bar. Rachel brings herself down off the bar. Sitting leant up against it, staring. "Oh shit!" She frowns. She's dropped herself onto the same side she just climbed over. She giggles to herself.

She looks ahead as Negan's door bursts open. "What in the holy fuck! Is going on out here?" He yells angrily, buckling his belt.

"I'm sorry.. i tried to be quiet.. it wasnt me.. it was the stool," she points, giggling.

"Jesus Christ, you're wasted! How much have you had?" Negan asks.

"Oh no, no no. I'm okay, just a few," she smiles.

"Yeah, fucking looks like it," he says, sarcastically, moving closer to her. "Oh Jesus! What have you done to your face!" He frowns, worriedly. He kneels in front of her. "Fuck. There's fucking blood everywhere!" He says, placing his hand gently under her chin.

"I just bumped my nose," she smiles, looking straight into his eyes. She looks remarkably like she did when she first met Negan. "Your eyes are pretty," she says. Negan's face softens, his head tilting to one side.

"Come on," he says, helping her up. "Let me take a look at you, get you cleaned up."

* * *

"It's not broken," Negan assures her, wiping the blood away with a cloth.

"Phew," she says.

"So how in the holy hell, did you get so fucking drunk?" He smiles, raising an eyebrow.

"We were playing a game.. seventy eleven?" She answers.

Negan laughs. "Yeah, that'll fucking do it."

"I'm okay though, i don't think i'm drunk anymore," she states proudly, swaying.

"Clearly," Negan says, sarcastically, rinsing the cloth in a bowl of water. "All done. Juat wait there, i'll get you a drink," he says, rising from his leather sofa. He leaves his room and goes to the bar, grabbing a bottle of water. "Here, drink as much of this as you can," he suggests, handing her the bottle. He sits down beside her.

She takes a sip. "I'm sorry i woke you," she smiles.

"That's alright, made my night interesting," he grins.

Rachel looks over at Negan's bed. "No wives?" She asks.

"They don't spend the night," Negan smiles.

"Why not?" Rachel asks, curiously.

"I'm worried one of them might kill me in my fucking sleep," Negan answers, grinning.

Rachel stares at him frowning, then bursts into laughter. "You know what? I've got nothing to say to that," she says, wiping at her eyes. Negan laughs a little. "You want me to tell you a secret?" Rachel asks.

"Always," Negan answers, smiling.

"I kinda like you," she smiles, swaying a little.

"Really?" Negan grins.

"Yep! I mean.. you're weird.. and kind of an arsehole-," she starts.

"Gee, thanks," Negan interrupts.

"You know what i mean," she smiles, poking him in the ribs. "You're pretty," she says, staring at him. Negan stares back, half bemused, half pleased with himself. Rachel lunges at him, wrapping her arms around his neck, her lips meeting his. Negan is taken by surprise, and for a few moments, he returns the kiss, his hands going to her waist. Rachel runs her fingers through the back of his hair. Negan takes his hands from her waist, raising them to her shoulders, and gently pushes her away.

"Rachel. We can't," he says, softly.

"What?" She says, confused. "But.. i thought you wanted me?" She adds, looking disappointed.

Negan tilts his head, sighing. "Of course i fucking want you, just.. not like this. You're fucking wasted."

"I'm not that wasted," Rachel smiles, grabbing at his belt.

Negan grabs her hand and pushes her back again gently. "Rachel, believe me. If you weren't fucking drunk right now. I'd be balls deep in you already. Even with you smelling like a fucking ash tray," he smiles.

Rachel looks at him. "Fine," she sulks, shrugging his hands away from her.

"Come on, don't be like that, baby," Negan reasons.

"I'm not your baby," she spits, turning her face away from him.

Negan laughs. "You know, most women would think it's kinda sweet, a guy refusing to take advantage like that?"

"Whatever," she snorts, crossing her arms childishly.

"Drink some more water," Negan says.

"Stop telling me what to do!" She shouts, turning to face him. "You're not the boss of me!" She scowls, still swaying drunkenly.

"You know. If you weren't so fucking cute. I would not let you get away with talking to me like that," Negan advises.

"What does that even mean? Who died and made you king of the world?" She slurs.

"Erm.. ninety fucking percent of the population," he answers, sarcastically.

"I'm going to bed," Rachel announces, standing. As she stands, the room begins to spin. Her mouth fills with saliva. "I think i'm gonna be sick," she says, holding her hand over her mouth. Negan grabs a metal bin from the corner of the room and hands it to her. She turns away from him and slumps in front of the sofa. She vomits loudly. Negan grimaces, walking to his dresser to grab a box of tissues. He sits on the sofa and gently rubs her back as she dry heaves. She spits into the bucket, the vomiting over for now.

"Here," Negan says, placing the tissues beside her.

"Thanks," she says, barely audible. Rachel grabs a tissue, wiping at her eyes, nose, and mouth. She tosses it into the bin. "I'm sorry for being so snappy before," Rachel apologizes, still hunched over the bin.

"That's fine," Negan assures her, smiling.

"You're not so bad really, i've met worse people," she says.

"You know, sweetheart. You really need to work on your fucking compliments," he smiles.

She grabs another tissue, wiping her face again. Pushing the bin to one side, she leans back against the sofa. "I'm not stupid, Negan. You're not the good guy, but you're not evil either."

He looks at her thoughtfully. "If i'm not a good guy, then why are you here?" He asks, curious.

"Good guys don't win any more," she says, staring blankly ahead. "I can't lose anyone else. I stick with you guys, i should be just fine.. you're an alright bunch i guess."

Negan smiles, placing a hand on her shoulder. "The guy who killed my friend Merle. He was evil," Rachel says. "I knew there was something wrong with him straight away though. His smile never quite reached his eyes. I can tell when someone's holding back.. when they're hiding something."

"What was his name, this guy?" Negan asks.

"Phillip, everyone called him The Governor though. He led the first group i was with, the place Merle took me to after he saved me. Woodbury," Rachel answers. Her eyelids begin to get heavy.

"So what happened with this fucking Governor guy? Why'd he kill your friend?" Negan asks. He's met with silence. He leans forward, brushing Rachel's hair away from her face. She's spark out. Negan lifts Rachel and carries her to his bed. He takes her boots off, smiling when a small knife falls out of her left boot. "Night, sweetheart," he smiles, kissing her forehead.


	9. Chapter 9

_"My hand hurts," Rachel says, wincing._

 _"It's supposed to. Now quit whingin like a little girl, an draw the damn bow!" He orders._

 _She draws the bow, fingers hurting. Her arm begins to shake. "You're holdin it too long. Ya need ta release it quicker," he advises._

 _"But how am i supposed to aim right?" She asks._

 _"Don't draw until you're ready ta shoot. Your arms are weak, girl. Ya won't be able ta hold a draw, until ya work on those damn arms!" He scolds._

 _She draws the bow then releases, missing the target. "Come on, girl! Ya can do better than that!" He taunts._

 _"I'm tired," she says, turning to him._

 _"Oh, i'm sorry. Would ya like to go take a siesta? Want me ta go get ya a nice stool so ya can put your feet up?" He asks sarcastically._

 _"Merle i-,"_

 _"No no," he cuts in, waving his hand, moving closer to her. "If this is all gettin too much for ya, go take a rest, Shortie," Rachel looks at the ground. "Ya think the biters give two shits if you're tired? Now.. you practically begged me, ta teach ya what i know, an i've been out here doing just that, cuttin into ma own, damn, personal time, i thought ya might have some potential, but maybe i was wrong? Maybe you're just another sorry sack of shit? Ya wanna keep being a victim? That's fine by me, jus don't waste ma damn time!" He shouts, walking off._

 _Rachel remains still, tears beginning to fill her eyes. Don't be such a pussy! She thinks, wiping her eyes. She continues to throw her arrows._

 _Merle comes back an hour later. He watches her practicing and smiles when he sees her hit the target more times than she misses. "Alright that's enough now. Ya done good today," he says. "Here, i got somethin for ya. Should help ya a little."_

 _He hands her a pair of black leather, fingerless glove. "Thanks Merle. These are great!" She smiles._

 _"Yeah yeah, come on, let's get ya somethin ta eat, shortie," he says._

 _She turns her head to the left. "You hear that?" She asks._

 _"Hear what?" Merle says._

 _"Whistling, you can't hear it?" She frowns._

 _"I can't hear shit, shortie, i'm dead."_

 _She turns to Merle, only it isn't Merle anymore, but a rotten corpse that resembles him. He grabs at her and she stumbles backwards to the ground. She attempts to scream, but nothing comes out..._

* * *

Rachel wakes, sweat covering her brow. Her head hurts, and her mouth feels like sandpaper. She can hear whistling coming from a door to her left, and running water. _Oh shit!_ She thinks, as last night comes back to her. The door to her left opens. Negan strolls out, freshly shaved in his white shirt and dark jeans, his hair is still wet from his shower. "Hey, beautiful!" He smiles.

"Hmm," she murmurs, pulling the blanket over her head, wishing the ground would swallow her up.

Negan grins from ear to ear, "Come on, baby, there's no need to be embarrassed," he smiles, sitting beside her on the bed.

"I'm not embarrassed! Why would i be embarrassed?" She says from under the blanket, her voice muffled.

"Well let's fucking see shall we?" He begins, putting his feet up on the bed, sitting up against his pillows. "There was you climbing over my bar, fuck i wish i'd seen that! I bet i would've got a fucking awesome view of your panties!" Rachel kicks him from under the blanket. "I'm just kidding.. the fuck i am, that was a lie," he laughs. "Any-fucking-hoo, what else was there? Oh yeah.. you tried to kiss me!" He smiles.

"I was drunk," she says.

"And you tried to grab my dick!" He grins.

Rachel pulls the blanket from her face, sitting. "I did not!" She argues.

"The fuck you didn't! You're lucky i'm a fucking gent!" He smiles.

Rachel stares at him, not quite sure what to say. She leans up against the pillows. "Could you get me some water.. please?"

"Sure, seeing as you asked so nicely," he smiles, leaving the bed. He grabs a bottle of water, handing it to her as he sits down on the bed beside her.

Rachel drinks slowly, holding her stomach as she feels it begin to cramp a little. "My mouth is so dry, it feels like an ashtray," she moans, rubbing her temples.

"Tasted like one too!" Negan smiles, licking his lips.

She throws him a sarcastic look. "Ha ha," she says, sarcastically. "I take little responsibilty for kissing you, i was wasted. There's no way that would have happened otherwise."

Negan pouts childishly. "Don't say that, sweetheart. You're breaking my fucking heart!" He grins.

She lies back on the pillows, holding her head. "I need to get up, i can't lie here all day. It'll just make me feel worse."

"You can use my shower if you want? Get yourself all refreshed and shit," Negan offers with a smile.

"Oh yeah, you'd like that wouldn't you," she says.

"Fuck yeah i would!" He grins. "Seriously though, i got shit to do, so i wouldn't even be here."

"Fuck it! I'll take you up on that," she replies. "I'll need to go get myself some clean clothes though, these smell like vomit!" She laughs.

"I already got you some clean clothes," Negan says, pointing to the sofa.

"Well that's thoughtful.. hey wait! Did you go through my things?" She asks, frowning.

"Fuck yeah i did! You know, you have a lot of little black cotton panties. You should branch out, wear something lacy," he smiles.

"I have no use for stuff like that," Rachel says, resting the back of her hand against her forehead.

"There's always a use for shit like that," Negan replies, biting his lip.

"Well if you like shit like that so much, you wear it," Rachel mocks.

"Hey, baby, i am fucking down, with the kinky shit. I'll do whatever fucking kinky shit you want. I don't have any limits. I'd wear whatever the fuck you wanted, if it meant i got to screw your brains out," he says, grinning from ear to ear.

Rachel stares at him, her face half frowning, half smiling. "You know, sometimes, i'd really appreciate it, if you didn't share so much. Maybe try and keep some thoughts in your head, i know it might be difficult, but you'd really do yourself a favour," she advises.

Negan smiles his trademark smile. "I'll fucking try, just for you. Can't promise anything though," he says, getting up from the bed. "I gotta go, sweetheart, help yourself to whatever the fuck you want, i'll see you the fuck later," he smiles, grabbing Lucille.

* * *

Rachel get's out of the shower, feeling much better for it. She dresses in her usual skirt, socks and vest combo, then heads to the main floor of the sanctuary. She sees Gareth, looking a little worse for wear. "Hey, Gareth," she says.

"Hey!" He smiles, clearly pleased to see her. "I'm surprised to see you up and about, from what i heard, you carried on drinking well after i passed out."

"I did yeah, felt like shit this morning, don't feel too bad now though," she replies.

"The others are all still in bed," he laughs.

"Can't hack it like we can," she jokes. "You know where i can get any good books from? I'm bored, and i've read all the books in my room, the decent ones anyway."

"Erm, yeah, you're in luck actually, we got a shit load the other day, they're in the storage room near the infirmary, you want me to show you?" He asks.

"I'm good thanks, think i can manage, seeya later," she waves absently, heading off.

"Yeah, seeya!" Gareth shouts after her, a look of disappointment crossing his face.

* * *

Rachel flicks on the light in the storage room and heads straight towards a shelf filled with books. She takes two, Misery and The Invisible Man. In all honesty, she doesn't feel much like reading any more. Her head has begun to throb. Rachel rubs her temples with her thumb and fingers, and heads for the medical storage room in search of painkillers.

Rachel opens the door of the storage room, startling someone inside.

"Shit i'm sorry! I didn't mean to scare you," she apologizes.

"That's okay," he says, picking up the items he'd dropped.

Rachel had seen him around the sanctuary, he wasn't one of Negans soldiers, he worked for points. He was about 5ft 10, kinda scrawny looking, with strawberry blonde hair.

He heads for the door, leaving the items he dropped behind. "Hey, you're forgetting what you came in for," she laughs, walking over to the shelf.

He looks at her nervously. "I didn't come in for anything.. i was just checking.. you know.. making sure we weren't getting low on anything."

"I thought Janet was in charge of med inventory?" She asks, curiously.

He stares at her, his hands in his back pockets. "Look.. i didn't take anything.. please don't tell anyone. I know you're tight with Negan, just.. forget i was here.. please?" He pleads.

"I won't say anything," she promises, her face grave. "What were y-," she starts.

"Seriously, just forget i was here," he interrupts, then leaves.

Rachel remains still for a few moments, confused. She walks over to the shelf and looks at the items he'd dropped. "Insulin?" She says to herself. She frowns, heading for the door.

She catches up to him in the corridor. "Hey! Wait up!" She shouts. He turns to her. "You must need this? Why else would you be in there?" She says, holding out the insulin.

He looks down at his feet. "I can't take that," he says, shaking his head. "I don't have enough points."

"But surely if you need it, points shouldn't matter?" She says.

He looks at her, astonished. "You can't be serious?"

"Look, just take it," she says, holding it out to him. "It's on me."

He looks at her mistrustfully, then takes the insulin. "Thanks."

"What's your name? I've seen you around plenty, never caught your name," she says.

"Dwight. You don't need to tell me yours, i know all about you. You're not like the others. You should leave while you still can. Before this place changes you," he advises. "Thanks for this," he adds, walking away.

Rachel watches him leave with mixed emotions. She's well aware of the points system, but would they really expect people to earn points for insulin? _Don't be stupid, you know that's exactly what they'd do,_ she thinks.


	10. Chapter 10

Rachel sits in her room, attempting to read Misery and failing. Her conversation with Dwight earlier sticks in her mind.

She gives up on the book, deciding to head downstairs in search of food, now that her appetite has somewhat recovered. She grabs a sandwich, taking it outside.

* * *

Rachel sits on the steps, watching the walkers on the fence as she eats. "There he is!" Someone shouts to her left. She turns her head, seeing Negan with David and two other saviors. One of them grabs Dwight, pushing him down to his knees. "Kneel you, cunt!" They order.

Negan stands before him, Lucille leaning over his shoulder. "Dwighty boy! We have a bit of a situation. A little fucking mystery if you will. I hope you're gonna help me fucking solve it. You see, Janet just checked the inventory on the meds. And we're missing some insulin. Now there's only one person i know of that needs insulin, but i'm guessing Tina doesn't have the fucking balls to sneak into the med storage and take it. So my best guess, is it had to be fucking you! Am i right?" Negan asks, his face stern.

Rachel rushes over.

Negan moves closer to Dwight, dropping Lucille close to Dwight's face. "Now don't you fucking lie to me, Dwighty boy! I hate when motherfuckers lie to me, nothing worse tha-,"

"It was me!" Rachel interrupts.

Negan stands straight. "What?" He asks, frowning.

"I took it, i knew Tina needed it, so i took it and gave it to her," she replies.

Negan stares at her, perplexed. Dwight looks at the ground nervously.

"That's against the rules, boss, should teach her a lesson," David says.

"Watch your fucking mouth, David! You don't fucking tell me anything!" Negan shouts, still staring at Rachel. "This the truth?" He asks her.

"Yeah, why would i lie?" Rachel answers, shrugging her shoulders.

Negan grinds his teeth. "Dwight, looks like it's your lucky fucking day, you can go about your business. Rachel, you come with me, we need a word," he says, walking in her direction.

* * *

Negan closes the door to Rachel's room behind him and places Lucille on the coffee table. He runs a hand over his face. "You telling me the truth?" He asks.

She frowns. "You already asked me that."

"I know that, but why would you do Tina a favour? I don't think you've said one goddamn word to her since you got here!" He says, moving closer to her.

Rachel stands her ground. "I took the insulin, not Dwight, me!" She answers, looking him straight in the eye.

He tilts his head back, chewing on the inside of his mouth, "You can't do that, Rachel."

"Why not? You said i could take whatever i wanted!" She argues.

"I said you could take whatever the fuck you wanted for you! Not for every fucker else!" He shouts.

"It's only a bit of insulin.. Jesus!" She frowns.

"It's not though is it? Simon and Gareth have both seen you giving food to the workers," Negan points out.

"Oh great! They go running to you like a couple of school boys," she says, rolling her eyes.

"They're doing you a fucking favour! Simon respects you, and Gareth.. well, Gareth thinks the sun shines out your fucking ass," he says, sarcastically. "A lot of my men respect you, but that only goes so far. There's a fucking line, Rachel. And you keep fucking crossing it on a daily fucking basis. I let you get away with talking to me the way you do, because i like you, more than i fucking want to. But i cannot! Let you get away with breaking the rules! If i let that shit go unpunished! My men will start to fucking doubt me!"

Rachel moves closer to him, tilting her head upwards. "So what you gonna do? You gonna punish me?" She asks, softly.

Negan looks down at her, a torn look on his face. "I don't want to.. you need to stop. I get that you wanna fucking help people, i do. You're good like that. Hell! That's why i'm alive right now! I already let you get away with so much shit, Rachel. I can't let you break the rules. My men will start to fucking question me otherwise."

Rachel's face softens. "I'm just trying to help. If she needs meds, why can't she have them?" She asks.

"You can't get something for nothing, sweetheart. You have to earn it. You thinks it's fucking helpful to just give shit away?" He questions, raising an eyebrow.

"It just.. it isn't right, to deny someone something that could save their life," she answers, honestly.

Negan smiles at her. "If i try and help her out, would that make you think better of me?" He asks.

"It wouldn't make me think any worse of you," she laughs.

Negan bites his lip and nods, "Alright. I'll see what i can do about that," he says, turning to grab Lucille.

"So what are you gonna do about me?" Rachel asks.

He turns to her. "Nothing, i would never fucking hurt you. My men will just have to deal with that," he answers. He moves closer to her and places a kiss on her forehead. "Never," he says, softly, then leaves.

Rachel lies on her bed, staring at the ceiling. She thinks about negan, wondering what his idea of helping someone out is. Mostly though, she thinks about that kiss. Such a little thing, but nonetheless, it had ignited something inside her. She hated that she felt this way about him. She was determined not to become just another notch on his bedpost. Her eyelids grow heavy.

* * *

 _"Never wipe your ass with that, unless ya want it itchin off for a damn week!" Merle warns her._

 _"But they all look the same to me," Rachel replies._

 _"Trust me, shortie, ya make the mistake of wiping your ass with that, you'll remember," he smiles._

 _Rachel and Merle walk through the woods, Rachel with her bow in hand, attempting to follow a trail. "I don't know where i'm going? I think i'm losing it?" She frowns._

 _"Naah, you're still on track, shortie," Merle assures her._

 _"Wait! I heard something," she whispers, holding her arm up._

 _"Just go with it, shortie, you lead the way," Merle says, smiling._

 _Rachel walks slowly, taking a bow from her shoulder. A deer stands in a small clearing. "Easy does it," Merle whispers. She levels the arrow with her eye, creeping towards the deer a few steps. She draws, then closes her eyes as she releases. When her eyes open, the deer is on the ground, an arrow protruding from it's neck._

 _"I did it!" She cheers, turning to Merle. She hugs him._

 _"Yeah yeah, ya did it, but ya might wanna keep your voice down, biters are never too far, shortie, don't forget that," Merle points out._

 _Rachel smiles apologetically. "Sorry."_

 _"Ya done good. girl," he says. A branch snaps in the distance, they both turn their heads. Two walkers in the distance, no doubt attracted by Rachel's cheering, ramble towards them. "See what ya can do about those," Merle points towards the dead._

 _She turns to him, her face grave. "I can't! What if i miss?" She asks, her eyes pleading._

 _"I've got my gun," Merle says, holding it in his left hand, "Don't disappoint me by makin me use it, i wanna see ya take both them out."_

 _Rachel grabs an arrow, her arm shaking. "Cut that shit out! You're over thinkin! Don't think, just do!" Merle shouts. "It's you, or them...so who's it gon be, shortie?" He asks._

 _She releases her arrow, hitting the walker straight through the eye, then quickly grabs another arrow, aiming at the second walker. She hits it's chest, panic starts to set in as it gets closer, she fumbles for another arrow and it drops to the floor. Rachel kneels to grab the arrow, but as she stands the walker is within grabbing distance. She raises her right leg, kicking the walker away. The walkers stumbles backwards, but doesn't fall. She drops her arrow, resting her bow over her shoulder and grabs a knife from her belt. Merle watches from a safe distance, his gun aimed at the walker. "It's too tall! I can't reach it's head!" Rachel shouts._

 _"I guess you're dead then, shortie!" Merle shouts._

 _Rachel kicks it away once again, buying herself seconds to think. She runs to its left, coming up behind it. She quickly kicks the back of it's kneecap, it stumbles. Rachel plunges the knife into the top of its head. The walker falls forward to the ground. She smiles at Merle, pleased with herself. She grabs at the knife but it won't budge. "Knife's stuck," she says._

 _Merle walks over. "That's why ya should always carry at least two, here, i'll show ya the best way ta get it out," he says. He pulls the knife out, and rolls the walker over. "Would ya look at that! It's a handsome son of a bitch!" He laughs. Rachel raises an eyebrow at Merle, then looks at the walker._

 _"No," she murmurs, shaking her head. She looks back up, but Merle is no longer there. Of course he isn't, as he's now on the floor, just another walker. Rachel slowly walks backwards, shaking her head "No, no, no..."_

* * *

Rachel wakes, sweating, her breath heavy. She sits up, leaning on her elbows. She feels disorientated. The light coming through the window feels strange, she could have sworn it should be dark by now. Rachel looks at her watch. _Five? I'm sure it was later than that?_ She thinks, tapping at her watch. Then it dawns on her, the light seems strange because it's morning. She's slept the night through. She gets out of bed and walks over to the sink, washing and brushing her teeth. She can't deny, she feels great. Obviously the sleep was much needed. She also feels absolutely famished, so makes her way to the main floor.

Rachel sits on her favourite step outside, demolishing a plateful of scrambled eggs with beans. She rests the plate on her lap, mopping up the bean juice with a slice of bread.

She takes the plate back to the kitchen, placing it in the sink. She hears something, someone crying? Rachel walks further into the kitchen, towards the food storage. A young girl sits on the floor, sobbing, her head buried in her knees. "Hey, are you okay?" Rachel asks softly, kneeling before her.

The girl jumps a little. She looks at Rachel, tears streaming down her face, her eyes red. "No," she says, shaking her head.

"What's wrong? Has someone hurt you? Cos i won't stand for that," Rachel promises.

She shakes her head. "No."

"Then what is it?" Rachel asks. "You can tell me."

"Negan.. he asked me to marry him," she answers, burying her head into her knees once again.

Rachel's eyes widen. "What's your name?" She asks.

"Tina," she says, wiping her nose.

Rachel grinds her teeth and takes a deep breath. "Do you want me to go find your sister?" She asks.

Tina nods, her head still hidden behind her knees.

Rachel found the next best thing to Sherry, which was Dwight, then she made her way to Negan's room.

She knocks on his door impatiently. "Who the fuck is knocking at this time of the morning?" Negan shouts from within.

"Rachel!" She answers.

"Well come the fuck in!" He shouts.

She enters, closing the door behind her. "You asked her to marry you?" She says, through gritted teeth.

"Well hello to you too," Negan says, from the sofa, a puzzled look on his face.

"What's wrong with you? She's just a kid," Rachel spits.

Negan stands. "She's nineteen actually, and superhot, look, i'm fucking confused, sweetheart, you said, you wanted me to help her out, or did i fucking mishear that?" He asks, frowning.

"That's your idea of helping her out?" She asks.

"Fuck yeah! She's got a good fucking deal. She marries me, and i promise to look after her. She won't have to worry about fucking points anymore, she can have all the damn meds she wants," he defends himself.

Rachel stares at him, shaking her head. "What if she says no?"

"Well then that's up to her, she'll just have to go back to earning points. I'm not gonna fucking force her to be my wife!" Negan replies. He moves closer to her, tilting his head. "Are you jealous?" He asks, licking his lips, "Is that what this is? Because, baby, you shouldn't be. This doesn't have to come between us," he says, motioning between them with his hand.

Rachel frowns in disgust. "There is no us!" She shouts.

Negan rolls his head back, chuckling. "I fucking love it when you get angry, baby, drives me fucking wild!"

Rachel close enough so their feet are almost touching. "There is no us. I'm done with you," She says, scowling.

Negan's face drops. "Wait, you're not leaving are you?" He asks, with genuine concern.

"I said i'm done with you, not this place," she answers. A look of relief washes over him, and she can't help feeling warm, right in the pit of her stomach at that look. "Just.. leave me alone from now on. Unless it's to do with this place, i don't wanna talk to you anymore."

"Don't be like that, sweetheart," Negan says, lifting his hand to her shoulder.

Rachel slaps his hand away. "And you can cut that shit out!" She says. Negan stares at her, his eyes boring into her. She can't stand it. "We, are done," she says, softly, then turns and walks away.


	11. Chapter 11

Two weeks had passed since Negan's proposal to Tina. She'd said she would think about it, and she was taking her damn time, that's for sure. Negan had allowed her so much time, purely not to piss Rachel off further. Negan sits with Simon in his room, deep in conversation.

"I fucking swear, my damn wives don't cause me as much grief as she does! I mean, what the fucking fuck does she expect from me? I try and do Tina a fucking favour. Does Rachel thank me for it? No!" Negan rants.

"Women can be funny like that," Simon says.

"What the fuck am i supposed to do? I mean seriously, Simon, i'm out of fucking ideas. She hasn't spoken to me properly for about two fucking weeks. I mean normally, i couldn't give a fucking shit when women give me the silent treatment. But her.. it's driving me fucking insane!" Negan says, rubbing his temples. "Fuck i want her, really bad. But it's not like i can ask her to be my wife, she's too fucking badass for that. I wouldn't want to share her anyway, and she'd tell me to go fuck myself!"

"Seemed like she was warming to you before," Simon points out. "Maybe you should just try getting her on her own, away from the sanctuary?" He suggests.

Negan nods. "That's not a bad idea, we could go on a run together. She can't fucking say no to that. She back from her hunt yet?" Negan asks.

"Yeah, she got back last night, seemed in a good mood too," Simon replies.

"Yeah, she fucking loves hunting," Negan smiles. "I'll ask her to show me how to hunt! She'll have to fucking talk to me then!" He grins.

* * *

Rachel sits in her chair, sharpening her knife. She hears a knock at the door. "Who is it?" She shouts.

"Negan!"

Rachel frowns. "Come in!" She answers. She continues sharpening her knife as he enters, refraining from looking up.

"Hey!" Negan smiles, "You sharpeni-,"

"What do you want?" She interrupts, her eyes focused on her knife.

Negan sits on the coffee table in front of her. "I want you to come out with me today," he says.

"A run?" She asks, still refusing to look him in the eye.

"No actually, i want you to take me hunting," Negan says.

Rachel stops sharpening, and looks at Negan in disbelief. She sits forward, arms resting on her thighs. "Is this a joke?"

"No," Negan answers, looking genuinely offended. "I want to learn how to hunt."

"You're taking the piss is what you're doing," she says, frowning.

"I am certainly fucking not! I want to learn how to hunt, and you, are the best hunter we have," Negan says, pointing at her.

Rachel leans back in her chair, huffing. "If we're gonna do this, then you better take it seriously," she says, pointing her knife at him as she speaks.

"Of course," he smiles, "Can you not point that fucking thing at me though, makes me fucking nervous as shit," he adds, gesturing to her knife.

Rachel lowers her knife. "Do you even know how to use a bow?" She asks

"A little, but you can teach me right?" Negan smiles.

"Sure," she answers sarcastically.

"Good, i'll meet you out front in twenty, that okay?" He asks.

"Sure," she replies blankly.

* * *

"What the fuck are we looking at? Because i can't see a damn thing," Negan asks. They had been tracking something for the last hour, but Negan couldn't see shit, and was quickly getting bored. "Shouldn't we have fucking caught up with it by now?" Negan whinges.

"We would if you'd shut your mouth!" Rachel scolds him.

"Well aren't you a barrel of fucking laughs," Negan says.

Rachel stops and turns to him. "I knew you weren't taking this seriously! You just wanted to get me alone didn't you?" She accuses.

He stares at her, biting the inside of his cheek. "Yeah, i did."

She turns around angrily. "I'm going back," she says, walking away.

"Hold the fuck on!" Negan shouts, grabbing at her arm.

"What!" Rachel yells, turning to him.

"Look! I've had just about enough of your fucking shit! I've been nothing but motherfucking nice to you!" He shouts.

"I never asked you to be! And if that's what you call nice, then you're a fucking joke!" She fumes.

Negan moves closer to her, his mouth pursed in anger. "If you weren't so hot, i'd bash your fucking brains in for speaking to me like that," he says.

"Go get Lucille out of the truck then! Put me out of my fucking misery!" She taunts him.

"Don't push me, Rachel," he warns her.

"Why? What are you gonna do?" She asks, staring up at him, "You gonna kill me? I'd like to see you try."

Negan stares down at her, looking deep into her eyes. A smile creeps onto his face. "You're so fucking beautiful, baby," he says, tilting his head.

Rachel's face drops a little, taken by surprise. "Shut up," she says, her mouth dry.

Negan bites his bottom lip. "That the best you got?" He says, his eyes sparkling.

Rachel's heart pounds in her chest. "What do you want from me Negan?" She asks.

"I thought it was pretty fucking obvious what i want," he says, moving closer to her. "I don't think i've ever wan-," Rachel's face drops for a moment. "What is it? What's wrong?" Negan asks, confused.

Rachel eyes dart from left to right. "You hear that?" She asks.

Negan stares at her, raising an eyebrow, then his face also drops as hears what she's hearing. "Fuck!" He whispers.

Walkers. "I can't pinpoint which direction they're coming from?" Rachel whispers.

"Sounds like they're coming from every fucking direction. We need to get the fuck outta here!" Negan answers.

Then they see them, and they are coming from every direction. "This way!" Rachel says, there's a town not too far, might be able to lose them!" She says, running.

They run side by side, walkers coming at them from every angle. Negan takes his knife from his belt as a walker lunges at Rachel. He plunges his knife deep in it's skull, then grabs at Rachel's arm. "Come on! This way!" He shouts, swerving another walker.

They reach the end of the woods, a small town in sight. The walkers are relentless. Negan and Rachel have managed to get ahead of them, but only by seconds. They run towards the town, hoping to give the walkers the slip. Rachel stops a moment, resting against a building. "What the fuck are you doing!" Negan shouts.

"I just need a second," she replies breathless, her hands resting on her thighs.

"Second over! Come the fuck on!" He shouts, impatiently, turning to go.

She nods to herself, ready to go. Then something grabs her from behind. She spins around. Her feet become tangled and she falls to the ground, taking the walker with her. A huge snarling walker at that. Negan still runs unaware. He turns his head briefly to check on her, his eyes widen. "Fuck! Rachel!" He yells, running back to her. The walkers from the woods are closing in now, within throwing distance.

Rachel struggles with the sheer weight of it, using all her strength just to keep it's hands away. Her knees are up to her chest in an effort to keep it's snapping jaws away from her. She sees no opportunity to grab her knife. _Shit...i guess this is it,_ she thinks. Thoughts flash through her mind, people, places. A million memories, but she goes straight to the only one that matters...her son. "James," she mouths, under her breath, tears falling down her cheeks. She closes her eyes, not wanting to give in, but also not seeing a way out.

Suddenly the walker goes limp. Rachel opens her eyes and sees Negan pulling the corpse off her. He pulls her up by her arm. "Come on!" He shouts, sweat running over his face. They run down the street, the dead right behind them. Rachel feels disorientated, so certain that she was going to die. She runs on autopilot. "Fuck fucking fuckity fuck!" Negan yells, as he sees more walkers heading towards them down the street.

Just like that, Rachel snaps out of it. Like a light switch being turned on. She turns her head to the right. "This way!" She shouts, grabbing his arm. They run between two buildings. "Up there!" Rachel shouts, pointing to a fire escape.

The ladder is just out of her reach. Negan attempts to pull it down, but to no avail. "You first!" He shouts, joining his hands together, giving her a leg up. She reaches it easily, and climbs fast. Negan grabs onto the ladder, kicking at a walker that grabs at his leg. Rachel glances below, relieved to see Negan right behind her. They climb to the highest apartment, which is four storeys up. They climb over the railing and look through the window. Negan smashes the window with the back of his gun. He takes off his jacket, placing it over the window pane. "Ladies first," he says, with no humor whatsoever.

* * *

They both go from room to room, checking for the dead. "It's clear," she says, as Negan exits the bedroom. Negan walks over to her and throws his arms around her, taking her by surprise.

"You fucking scared the shit out of me," he says in her ear. "I thought it fucking had you for a minute there."

"You're not the only one," she laughs half heartedly. She brings an arm up, patting his back gently.

Negan opens his eyes. They widen as he catches sight of her shoulder. "Your shoulder..it's bleeding!" He says, spinning her round, inspecting it. "Did it scratch you?" He asks worriedly.

"No, i must have grazed it on the floor," she answers.

"Are you sure?" He adds.

"I'm sure, Negan, it didn't get anywhere near my shoulder.. seriously," she assures him.

He nods, letting out a sigh. "Come on, i'll clean it for you," he says, leading her to the kitchen table.

* * *

Rachel sits with her back to Negan as he cleans the graze on her shoulder. He dabs gently with his scarf, his fingers resting lightly on her bare shoulder, the straps from her bra and vest top hanging against her arm. Negan finds himself deeply aroused by this, and has to fight the urge to stroke her shoulder, knowing that now isn't the time. "Why did you come back for me?" Rachel asks, startling him a little.

Negan stares for a moment, a confused look on his face. "Why wouldn't i?" He says, tipping more water onto his scarf.

"Those walkers were pretty close, i wasn't sure you'd risk coming back for me," she answers, honestly.

He stops in his tracks, a hurt look on his face, then continues cleaning her shoulder. "You obviously don't know me at all."

"I didn't mean it like that, i wasn't trying to make you sound like a dick. It's just.. not everyone would go back, not when the odds aren't great," she says, softly.

"Yeah, well, i'm not everyone," he says. "There you go, all done," he smiles.

Rachel turns around in her seat. "Thanks for that."

"You're welcome," Negan smiles at her. "You got a little walker crap on your cheek, let me get that," he offers, pouring more water onto his scarf. He wipes her cheek gently.

Rachel looks at him, like she's seeing him for the first time. He puts his scarf down on the table. "Negan," she says, softly.

"Yeah?" He answers, looking in her eyes.

Rachel leans forward and kisses him gently. His face is smooth, and his lips are soft. She lingers for a moment then kisses him again, her fingers brushing his neck. Negan runs his hand through her hair, his thumb stroking her jawline.

Rachel's other hand goes to his shoulder, and she sits astride him in one quick movement. Negan's hands go straight to her waist.

She can feel the hardness of him on her thigh, and rolls her hips suggestively, creating a beautiful friction.

Negan breathes deeply, his fingers digging into her waist. His tongue meets hers as they kiss more ferociously. He pulls at her vest, and she raises her arms as he lifts it over her head. His hands trail her back, sending sweet shivers all over her body. Rachel pulls his shirt off and runs her fingers through his chest hairs. She bites gently on his bottom lip.

Negan brings his hand up to her hair, pulling at it gently, tilting her head backwards as he traces kisses all over her neck. His other hand is on her shoulder, pulling at her strap. He works his way there, his teeth grazing her shoulder. He unhooks her bra with ease, throwing it absently to one side.

Rachel runs her fingers through the back of his hair, arching her back, allowing him easier access to her breasts. He runs his hand over her breasts, still kissing her shoulder, his thumb rolling over her nipple, teasing it.

She pulls at his hair, bringing her face towards his. She tilts his head back and runs kisses over his neck. Negan lets out a moan, his breath heavy. His hands work their way up her thighs, reaching under her skirt.

She can feel his cock twitching beneath her. Rachel can stand the torment no longer, as the heat between her legs becomes unbearable. She works her way back to his mouth, kissing him roughly. Her hand goes to his belt, unbuckling it with the eagerness and impatience that only someone who has been starved for so long can understand.

Negan normally takes great pleasure in teasing his women. Witholding himself till they can stand it no longer. But his own eagerness gets the better of him as he pulls at her panties. She lifts her leg, enabling him to slip them off. Their kisses become ferocious.

Rachel pulls at his boxers, releasing him, feeling the hardness of him. Rachel places a hand on his shoulder, looking him in the eye as she slides him deliciously inside her. A moan escapes the both of them.

He kisses her gently. One hand in her hair, the other grasping at her hip. She rolls her hips slowly, feeling the fullness of him, relishing it. She arches her back and Negan kisses her breast, rolling his tongue over her nipple. He bites gently. His hands on her hips, pulling her onto him, wanting to go deeper. She moves faster, exhaling with every thrust. Negan bucks his hips. "Fuck!" He moans.

He grabs her waist, rising out of his seat, and lifts her onto the table. He kisses her fiercely, their tongues colliding, exploring each others mouths. He thrusts into her, biting gently at her bottom lip. She digs her fingers into his shoulders. Negan grabs her wrists, pinning them down onto the table. He moves his hips slowly, building a steady rhythm, his lips brushing hers with each thrust. She tightens around his cock, making his legs buckle slightly.

He releases her wrists, grabbing at her thigh. He pushes her thigh towards her, going deeper. She moans loudly with each thrust, a sweet heat building inside her as she comes close to her orgasm. Her hips move in time with his as he thrusts faster. "Don't stop," she whispers, breathlessly. He moves faster, breathing heavily, lifting his head to gaze at her. She claws at his back. "Oh god.. Negan!" She moans loudly. She throws her head back as her orgasm comes, like a build up of electricity released through her entire body. She pulsates, twitching around his cock.

"Oh fuck!" Negan shouts, as he reaches his own orgasm. Thrusting himself deep and hard inside her, his cock spasming as he shoots his load.

She runs her fingers over the back of his neck, her mouth open, breathing heavily. Negan rests his head on her breasts, attempting to catch his breath. Rachel strokes his hair. Negan wants to tell her how amazing it was, but he's rendered speechless. So he lays there a while, his hand stroking her breast. He finally finds his voice. "That, was fucking amazing," he says.

"Hmm, it was. Better than i expected," Rachel smiles.

Negan lifts his head, and smiles at her. "Better than you expected? Does that mean you thought about fucking me?"

"Maybe," she chuckles, lightly.

Negan kisses her, his hand brushing her cheek. He brushes his nose against hers playfully. "That was so much fucking better than i ever imagined," he says.

She smiles, kissing him softly. "We should probably stay here a while. Wait for the herd to clear out."

"Fuck yeah! I ain't in a fucking rush to leave, and.. i ain't even fucking close to being done with you, baby," he says, licking his lips. He kisses her deeply, running his hands through her hair. "Wrap your legs around me," he whispers in her ear. She wraps her legs around him tightly. He lifts her with ease and makes his way to the bedroom.


	12. Chapter 12

She wakes with arms around her, her face nuzzled deeply in Negan's chest. She can feel his heart beating, feel the warmth of him against her, and it feels good. She runs her hand through the hairs on his chest, curling them with her fingers. She'd never admit this to him, but she could lie this way forever.

"Feels nice," Negan says, sleepily, startling her a little.

She tilts her head up towards him, smiling. "Does it? I'll stop then," she giggles.

"Don't you fucking dare," he grins, stroking her shoulder. He looks down at her, deep into her eyes. "Who's Daryl?" He asks, raising an eyebrow.

Her smile falters. "Why would you ask that?" She questions, her mouth suddenly going dry.

"You were shouting his name out in your sleep," he says. Rachel would swear he looked a little hurt.

"He was from my last group. He was a good guy," she says.

"Was he your guy?" Negan asks, a little bitterly.

Rachel half smiles, half frowns. "Are you jealous?" She asks.

"Yes," Negan answers, honestly, his eyes burning into hers. No trace of a smile on his face, yet still he manages to stroke her shoulder tenderly.

"You do realise how ridiculous that sounds right? Coming from a man with six wives," Rachel frowns.

"Well what can i say? I'm a selfish motherfucker," he chuckles.

Rachel breaks into a smile. "Well at least you're honest, i'll give you that. Even if you are a cheeky sod."

"Cheeky sod? What the fuck does that even mean?" He grins, confused.

"Never mind," she giggles. Rachel breaths in deeply. "He wasn't my guy anyway."

"Really? You sound disappointed," he says.

"Negan, can we not?" She sighs. "I know you have this thing were you have to know every last little detail. But can you just drop it?" She asks.

"You love him?" Negan asks, his eyes looking downwards.

Rachel rolls her eyes. She throws back the covers and gets out of bed.

"Where are you going?" He asks, his face dropping.

"For a piss, if that's alright with you?" She says, leaving the room.

* * *

On her way back from the bathroom she looks through the windows. The herd seems to have cleared. Rachel heads back to the bedroom, going straight to the window. She pulls the curtain to one side. "Herd's cleared."

"Really? Well that is a fucking wonder, what with all the noise we were making last night," Negan grins, seeming in a much better mood.

Rachel continues looking through the window. "I don't remember making that much noise," she teases.

Negan licks his lips. "Why don't you get that sexy ass over here, and i'll fucking remind you."

She turns to him, not a stitch of clothing on her. "We should go."

He smiles at her, and holds out his hand. "Come here, baby."

Rachel stares at him for a moment then relents, walking towards him. Negan grabs her hand and pulls her on top of him. He pushes her hair back from her face and kisses her deeply. She can feel him twitching against her thigh. She runs her own hands through his hair. Negan grabs her waist and rolls her onto her back. He runs his hand down her body, skimming her breast. "I could just eat you up, baby," Negan whispers in her ear. "Maybe i should start here?" He says, teasing his fingers over her clit. Rachel moans. "Would you like that?" He asks, grazing his teeth over her neck.

"Yes!" She gasps.

* * *

Three hours pass before they find themselves back at the truck. Negan goes straight for the passenger seat, grabbing Lucille. "You missed me didn't you," he grins.

Rachel has gotten used to how he talks to Lucille by now. Even though she still finds it strange, she figures it's just his way of coping. And she actually finds it makes her like him more. That he'd attach himself in such a way to an object. Maybe he's not as tough as he thinks?

On the way back to the sanctuary, they talk pretty much nonstop. Negan mostly, of course. But Rachel is more than happy to listen to him rambling on. "So this Daryl guy?" Negan starts.

"Come on, Negan. Don't ruin it. I'm feeling pretty good right now," she interrupts, frowning.

Negan holds his hands up. "I wasn't going to ruin it. I just wanted to know if he was the leader of your group? Maybe you got a thing for people in charge?" He grins, licking his lips.

Rachel turns to him, raising an eyebrow. "No, he wasn't," she answers. Returning her attention to the road.

"How long were you with them for?" Negan asks.

She keeps her eyes on the road. "I'm not sure? Time passes differently now, don't you think?"

"It most certainly fucking does," he nods.

"I'd say, about six months maybe?" Rachel guesses.

"So what happened?" Negan asks, softly.

"Not while i'm driving," she says. "I'm not saying i won't talk about it. Just.. not right now, okay?"

Negan stares at her. "Sure," he nods.

"I can't wait to take a shower," Rachel says, changing the subject. "I bloody stink!"

"I know," Negan chuckles.

Rachel whacks him half heartedly on his thigh. "Cheeky sod!" She laughs.

"Hey, i didn't mean that as a fucking insult. You stink of sex, we both do. There's no better fucking smell, in the damn world," he smiles, running his tongue over his bottom lip.

Rachel turns to him, and smiles. "You are so weird!"

"You only just fucking figured that out?" He grins.

* * *

They arrive at the sanctuary at just a little past 11am. Negan frowns as Rachel drives through the gate.

"What the fuck is going on?" He says.

"What's up?" Rachel asks, glancing at Negan.

"Their faces is what's fucking up, sweetheart." Negan exits the truck and is instantly greeted by several of his men. They kneel before him. "Alright, get the fuck up," he gestures with his hand. "What is it?"

Timmy looks at Negan nervously. "It's Dwight, boss. He's gone."

"Gone?" Negan frowns.

"Him and Sherry.. and her sister," Timmy says.

"Fuck!" Negan shouts, massaging his temples with one hand.

"That's not all.. they took the meds," Timmy adds.

Negan stares at him. "What the fuck! How in the holy fucking fuck, did the three of them, manage to get out of here unnoticed, with fucking meds?" He asks, angrily.

"Erm, i..," Timmy starts.

"You know what, never fucking mind. I want them fucking found!" Negan shouts, frustrated.

"We have people looking for them," Timmy assures him.

Rachel listens from the side of the car, deep in thought.

"Well i want more people out looking! It's one thing, running off like that. But they fucking stole from us! I want them fucking found!" Negan yells.

Timmy nods, nervously. "I'll put another group together."

"You got Neil on this?" Negan asks. "Guy's a tracker, right? He should be able to find them."

Timmy shakes his head. "Neils out hunting. No one knows where, and he dont have no radio."

"Fuck!" Negan curses, slamming his hand on top of the truck. He sees Rachel watching from the other side. He walks over to her. "You can track, right?"

Rachel looks at him uncomfortably. "Yes. I'm not the best though, Neil's probably better."

"He's not!" Timmy shouts over. "You're a million times better than him."

"Jesus, Timmy, will you give us some fucking breathing space!" Negan shouts, throwing him a nasty look.

"Sorry, boss," Timmy says, walking to the other side of the yard.

Negan stares at her, resting his hand gently on her shoulder. "You're one of us, right?"

She looks deep into his eyes, her face pained. "Yes. I am. But can't you just let them go?" Rachel pleads.

Negan sighs. "If it was just them, then maybe. Maybe i'd do that.. for you. But they stole from us, Rachel. I can't let them get away with that," he says, stroking her shoulder. He brings his hand gently up to her face, brushing her hair back. "We need you, Rachel. I, need you. Please help me on this."

Rachel glances down at her feet, then looks up at him. "Okay," she nods.

Negan's eyes light up as he smiles. He brings her closer to him and kisses her forehead. "Thank you, baby."

"Don't thank me yet. There's no guarantee i'll find them, especially if they've been gone a while," she says honestly.

"I know, baby. But at least you're gonna try, and that's all that fucking matters," he smiles. "Timmy, get together as many men as you can, Rachel's gonna-,"

"Actually, it'll be better with less people. That way they won't muck up the trail," Rachel interrupts.

Negan turns to her. "How many do you need?"

"T and i should be fine," she says.

Negan frowns. "I don't know. I don't like the sound of that. At least take someone else. What about David over there?" Negan suggests.

"Not David," Rachel says quietly.

Negan looks at her bemused. "You got a problem with David?" Negan's face takes on a more serious tone. "He hasn't done anything has he?"

"No," she assures him. "I just, i don't get good vibes from him, that's all."

Negan nods, looking a little relieved. "Fair enough. But i'd be much happier if you took someone else."

"You do remember how we met right?" Rachel smiles.

Negan chuckles. "Course i fucking do. That doesn't mean i don't worry about you though. Besides, there's three of them. You'd struggle to bring them back with just the two of you."

"Look. If we spot them, we can radio for more men. Seriously. I'll have more chance of getting a trail, if it's just me an T," she explains.

Negan bites the inside of his cheek, contemplating. "Alright. I don't like it. But if you think that's best?"

"It is," she answers.

* * *

Rachel and Timmy had been travelling for an hour. They'd taken a couple of motorbikes, and Rachel had been a little wobbly at first. It had been a good few years since she'd ridden solo, and she'd forgotten how freeing it was. Feeling the wind in your face, nothing but you and the open road. Of course, she had been on a motorbike more recently, but she tried not to think about that.

Timmy had told her that Dwight and the others had left on foot. Which was good, because they couldn't have gotten far. But they also hadn't been seen since last night. Rachel tried to put herself in their shoes. Which way would she go? _No._ She thought. _Which way would they go?_ She signals for Timmy to stop. Rachel rests the bike on it's kickstand. "Why we stopping?" Timmy asks

"I wanna walk the road a little. See if i can see anything," she says.

"Why? Can you see something?" He asks.

"Well i won't if i don't start looking," she answers, staring into the woods. She walks towards the woods slowly, her attention on the ground. She grabs one of her arrows and kneels. She begins to dig with it. It doesn't take her long to find something. _Jesus! It's like they want to be found!_ She thinks.

"What is it?" Timmy asks, from over her shoulder.

Rachel holds up a bottle. "Insulin."

"Holy shit! How did you know that was there?" He marvels.

"The ground was disturbed," she says.

"Yeah, but how did you know to stop here? You couldn't have seen that from the side of the damn road," he says.

Rachel shrugs. "Just luck i guess?"

"No way. That's like some, sixth sense shit or something?" He says, genuinelly shocked.

Rachel laughs. "Come on. We've got a trail," she says, heading into the woods.

She follows three sets of footprints, and she knows she's getting close. The prints aren't that old. Timmy follows her, watching with wonder, ss she follows what to him, is an invisible trail.

"Are we getting close?" He asks.

"Shhh!" She says. "If you have to talk, keep it to a whisper. I think we are close though."

Rachel knows they are. She constantly underestimates herself as a tracker, always doubting herself. But now, she's sure. They can't be more than 10 minutes behind Dwight. Suddenly, their tracks veer left sharply. And Rachel can see why, as she spots walker tracks ahead of her to the right. The walkers mustn't have spotted them, as their tracks continued on to the right.

"Why we stopping?" Timmy whispers.

"Tracks are messy, walkers came through here not long ago. Just give me a minute," Rachel says, thinking. She thinks of Dwight. Well aware of what might happen to him if she delivers him to Negan. Then she thinks of Negan. What he said to her. That he needed her. He'd put his trust in her. She rubs her temples, very much resembling Negan in the process.

"Which way we going?" Timmy asks.

"This way," she says, turning to the right.


	13. Chapter 13

Rachel had continued to follow the imaginary trail for a further three hours. Timmy and Rachel had come across the group of walkers within five minutes of turning right. They swerved them easily, avoiding a fight, as they were considerably outnumbered. She hated lying, and found herself struggling to continue following something that she knew wasn't there. She continued on though, until they came to a small town.

"Trail gone cold?" Timmy asks her.

"Trail's been cold since those walkers mucked it up," she answers. Rachel looks at him apologetically. "I'm sorry, T."

"Ain't nothing to be sorry about. Not your fault," he assures her, throwing her a sympathetic look.

Rachel nods, looking at the ground. "We should head back. I'm not gonna be of any more use i'm afraid."

Timmy rests a hand on her shoulder. "Hey. Knock that shit off. You done good."

For a moment, it reminds her so much of Merle, that she gets a deep sickly feeling in the pit of her stomach.

* * *

They arrive back at the sanctuary just after six. Rachel heads straight for her room, getting herself a much needed wash and a change of clothes. She lies on her bed. Hands behind her head, staring up at the ceiling. There's a knock at the door.

"Who is it?" She asks.

"Joey!"

Rachel goes to the door, wondering what Joey could possibly want.

"What's up, Joey?" She asks.

"Erm, Negan wanted me to check if you were back. Said he wanted to see you," he says.

Rachel nods. "Okay, i'll head straight over."

Rachel stands at Negan's door, willing herself to knock on. It frustrates her that she feels so guilty. Especially since she knew deep down she'd done the right thing. _Stop being such a pussy!_ She thinks, then knocks on the door.

"Come in," Negan calls.

Rachel opens the door and steps inside. "Hey," she says, standing in the doorway.

"Well don't just stand there. Come the fuck in," Negan smiles. "Can i get you a drink?" He offers.

"Yeah, just water though. Don't wanna go getting drunk again," she jokes, sitting down on the sofa.

Negan chuckles, getting out of his seat to get her a water. He brings her a glass and sits down beside her. "I'm sorry," she blurts out.

Negan frowns. "What the hell are you sorry about?"

She places the glass on the table and turns to him. "I didn't find them," she says, her eyes dropping to the sofa. She plays with her hands nervously.

"Hey," he says softly, reaching for her hand. "You have fuck all to be sorry about, baby. You were great out there. Timmy told me all about it. Though the way he told it, he was talking like you were some damn superhero," Negan chuckles, holding her hands between his. "Seriously though. I know you didn't want to go out there today. But you fucking did. And that's all that matters."

Rachel smiles at him. "I could hardly say no. You're a hard man to say no to, Negan."

Negan grins, his tongue running over his bottom lip. "Is that so?"

"You know damn well it is," she answers.

"See, you're wrong there. Because if i'd had my way. We would have been fucking in that storage room, back at the school," he says.

"You've got a point," she giggles lightly.

"You're a hard woman to read, Rachel. Normally, i'm a fucking Einstein at reading women. But you. I can't read you from one fucking minute to the next," he says.

"Is that a bad thing?" She asks, raising an eyebrow.

"I'm not sure yet. I'd like to get to know you better," Negan says. His hand is now stroking hers. "You wanna tell me what happened with your group? And that guy Merle?"

"You really wanna hear that?" Rachel frowns.

"I most certainly fucking do," Negan answers.

She stares at him for a moment then lets out a deep sigh. Rachel pulls her hand away from his, resting her arm on the back of the sofa. Negan does the same, mirroring her.

"I was at a town called Woodbury, that much you know," she starts.

Negan nods. "Yeah, that's were Merle took you. Run by that Governor guy,"

"Yeah. Well. I never really liked him, i said as much to Merle. He told me to keep that opinion to myself. So i did. Anyway. One night, we got attacked by another group. We lost a few people. But when it was over, the Governor gathered everyone together. Now, i had no fucking clue what had gone on, but he had a fucking bandage over his eye. So i guessed a lot had gone on. Anyway, he gathered everyone at the fighting pit-,"

"Fighting pit?" Negan asks, confused.

"The Governor used to hold fights. He'd have walkers chained up and two people would fight for entertainment," Rachel says.

"Really? That sounds fucking awesome," Negan smiles.

Rachel frowns. "It wasn't awesome, it was disgusting. Don't go getting any ideas," she says.

"Alright, continue," he ushers with his hand, smiling.

"He gathered everyone at the fighting pit. Merle was in the middle. The Governor made this big speech, about how Merle had led the group that attacked us to Woodbury. And he'd captured one of them. Merle's brother..Daryl," she says, with a far off look.

Negan doesn't care much for that look, but he remains quiet, allowing her to finish.

"He wanted them to fight to the death. Said the winner could go free. And they did fight at first. All the times Merle had spoke about his brother, and there he was, kicking the shit out of him. But it wasn't long before they stopped fighting each other. Started fighting the walkers instead. Then gunshots came out of nowhere. Everyone started to run. One of those smoke bombs went off, i couldn't see a damn thing. It was Daryl's group, and they were smart. Started shooting at the lights. I tried to head in the direction Merle went, but like i said, i couldn't see a damn thing. I left Woodbury, but i never saw Merle again," she says, her eyes brimming with tears. She wipes at them with the back of her hand before they can fall. "I carried on looking for him though," Rachel continues. "I was out in the woods, following a trail."

Negan listens intently.

* * *

 _Rachel walked through the woods, following a trail. Hoping silently, that it was Merle. She'd been following it for close to two hours._

 _"Why ya followin me?" Came a voice in the distance, startling her._

 _Rachel looked ahead, her eyes meeting with a crossbow. Her hand hovered over the knife on her belt. "I'm looking for someone," she said._

 _"Ain't no one out here but us an the dead," he answered, still aiming the crossbow at her head._

 _He lowered his aim slightly, and she recognized him from Woodbury. "Hey wait. You're Daryl right?" She asked._

 _"Who wants ta know?" He asked, refusing to lower his bow any further._

 _"I'm Rachel. I was at Woodbury," she said._

 _At the mention of Woodbury, he raised the bow to her head once more._

 _Rachel raised her hands. "I was looking for Merle. You're his brother right?"_

 _Daryl's stern look faltered. "If ya were lookin ta kill him, ya needn't bother. He's dead."_

 _Rachel lowered her hands, her face grave. "How?" She asked, her mouth dry._

 _"Governor. Merle went ta find him an kill him. The Governor got ta him first. He shot him an left him ta turn. I had ta put him down myself," he said._

 _Tears fell down her cheeks. "I..i'm sorry," she said._

 _Daryl brought his crossbow down at the sight of this. Confused as to why someone other than himself, would cry over his brother. "You with him or somethin?" He asked, confused._

 _Rachel shook her head, wiping the tears with the back of her arm. "Not like that. But..he taught me everything i know," she said, and the tears began to fall once again._

 _"Merle did? He never did anythin if there were'nt somethin in it for him," Daryl said, frowning._

 _Rachel laughed a little at that. "Yeah. He comes across that way doesn't he...or he did," she added, glancing at the ground. "He was a hard man to love. But i loved him anyway."_

 _Daryl threw her a bemused look. "You sure we're talkin bout the same Merle?"_

 _Rachel nodded. "He saved my life you know. He didn't have to. But he did. And he carried me all the way to Woodbury," she said.._

 _"Don't sound like Merle at all," Daryl pointed out._

 _"Yeah well, he did. And he taught me a load of stuff. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him," she said.._

 _They stood there in silence for a few moments, assessing one another. Daryl broke the silence. "How many walkers you killed?"_

 _Rachel looked up at him. "You might as well ask how many times i've drawn breath today," she joked._

 _"How many people you killed?" He asked._

 _She looked at him uncomfortably. "Two."_

 _"Why?" He asked._

 _"It was them or me," she answered honestly._

 _Daryl stares at her for a moment. He threw his crossbow over his shoulder. "You wanna come with us?" He offered._

 _"Who's us?" She asked._

 _"I'm part of a group, we have a prison, not too far from here. We took in all the people from Woodbury," he said._

 _"Really?" Rachel asked, raising an eyebrow._

 _Daryl nodded, holding the strap of his bow. "A lot happened since you've been gone. The governor went crazy. Shot up a bunch of his own men."_

 _"Jesus," Rachel said. She looked at Daryl. "What's the leader of your group like?" She asked._

 _"His names Rick, and he's a good man. We're good people," he assured her, nodding his head._

* * *

Negan sits quietly, listening to her story. Inside though, he feels that all too familiar pang of jealousy. Watching Rachel's face as she talks about Daryl, it takes every ounce of his strength not to grab her right there and make her his. Outwardly though, he manages to remain calm. "So what happened after that?" He asks.

"Things were good for a while. But then a bunch of people got sick. Some kind of flu. I was lucky, i didn't get it. But we lost a lot of people to it. We had an awesome doctor though, Hershel his name was, saved a lot of lives. People started to get better, things seemed to be getting better. Then The Governor showed up at the fence," she says, her face pained.

"Shit. He didn't go down with Woodbury?" Negan asks, genuinely curious.

"Unfortunately, no. He had a new group. He wanted us to give him the prison. Said we could leave without a fight. But we still had sick people, and children.

"Weren't there enough of you to fight?" Negan asks.

"Yeah, but he had a damn tank," she answers.

"Holy shit! Really?" Negan smiles, then realising she wouldn't appreciate that, he dampens it before she can see.

"Yeah. He also had two of our people with him. Rick tried to talk him down. Said we could all live in the prison, together. For a moment, it almost looked like Rick was getting through to him. But then it all turned to shit. The Governor swung at one of ours that he'd taken captive. Pretty much took their head off," she says, tears on the brink. "I was in one of the guard towers. Everyone started shooting. I started shooting from the tower, took out as many as i could. Until the tank started aiming for the tower i was in. I barely made it out of there. Walkers cut me off, pushed me out into the woods. I went back though. And everyone was gone. I'm not sure if they all died. But i haven't seen any of them since. There wasn't even a trail i could follow. Everything was just so.. all over the place. I just wandered round the woods. I did see some signs for a place called Terminus. And i was gonna head there. But then i found you," she smiles.

Negan smiles back at her. "So you don't actually know for sure that all your people are dead?" Negan asks.

"No. And i suppose it'd be pretty arrogant for me to assume i'm the only one who made it out alive. But if they did, it doesn't matter i guess. I tried looking for them. But i found nothing. This is my home now, this place. These are my people now," she says.


	14. Chapter 14

Negan gently strokes Rachel's face, wiping at a tear with his thumb. He's torn between wanting to comfort her, and wanting to fuck her brains out. Her current vulnerability makes him want her more. Coupled with his growing jealousy over a man he's never met, Negan struggles to hold himself back. His dick throbbing between his thighs, he rests his forehead against hers, breathing deeply. He runs his hand through Rachel's hair. Negan can't remember a time when he wanted someone as much as he wants her right now.

"I don't want to think about it any more," Rachel says, softly. She rubs her nose gently against his and brings her hand up to his face. "Take me to bed," she says, against his cheek, his stubble rubbing against her lips.

Negan let's out a deep breath, smiling. "You want me, baby?"

"Yes," she answers, dragging her lip over his jawline.

Negan cups her face with both hands, their lips connecting. He rises out of his seat, bringing Rachel with him, his lips not leaving hers. He removes her vest as they make their way over to his bed. Negan removes his shirt as Rachel unhooks her bra, tossing it to the floor absently.

She runs her hands over his body, running her fingers through the hairs on his chest. Rachel can feel the hardness of him against her hip. She rubs herself against him, wrapping her arms around his neck, kissing him more deeply.

They fall onto the bed, Negan pinning her arms above her head as he kisses her intensely, his tongue swirling over hers. He runs kisses over her neck, his teeth nipping and sucking as she moans beneath him. He runs his lip over her collar bone, learning from the previous night that it's a sensitive area for her. Negan smiles as he sees her skin break out in gooseflesh. He continues to suck gently on her collarbone as she writhes her hips beneath him.

Rachel feels his bulge against her hip. She desperately raises her hips in an attempt to create some much needed friction.

Negan shifts his leg against her thigh, pinning her down with it. Rachel whimpers. He trails kisses down to her breasts, his lip brushing over her nipple. His tongue rolls over it teasingly. He sucks and bites. Rachel continues to moan breathlessly. Negan releases her wrists as he traces kisses down her stomach, running his hands down her sides. He unbuttons her skirt slowly, taking great pleasure in how she rolls her hips upwards, showing her eagerness. Negan tucks his fingers into her skirt and panties, pulling them both down her legs. He rises to his knees, looking down at her. He looks at her as if an animal, looking at it's prey before it dines down. Negan leans forward, his hands gently skimming over her thighs. He runs wet kisses down the inside of them.

Rachel gasps as he rolls his thumb over her clit. His fingers slide deliciously inside her.

Negan smiles against her inner thigh as he feels the wetness of her. His head between her legs, he gently rolls his tongue over her juices, lapping them up.

Rachel grabs at the back of his hair, tilting her head back on the bed as he runs his tongue all over her. He sucks gently on her clit, creating a beautiful heat, taking her close to the brink. She rolls her hips and pushes his head gently, creating more pressure. "Negan," she moans, grasping at his hair.

Negan watches her as he continues licking and sucking. He feels her legs begin to shake as she reaches her orgasm, crying out his name. He rises once again, unbuckling his belt, unleashing his throbbing cock.

Rachel sits up and runs her hand over his length. She rolls her tongue over the tip, then takes him in her mouth.

Negan groans, grabbing her hair.

She continues rolling her tongue over his shaft as she sucks, struggling to take even half of him in her mouth.

Negan pulls her head back and removes his pants. He lays her down on the bed, kissing her hard. He runs his hand over neck, his other hand grabbing his cock, rolling it torturously over her clit. "You want that, baby?" He whispers in her ear.

"Yes," she cries.

"Tell me you want it," he growls, huskily.

"I want it, fuck yes i want it. Give it to me," she pleads.

Negan chuckles, then slams into her.

Rachel cries out, her fingers digging into his shoulders.

Negan thrusts into her relentlessly. If she wasn't so wet, he's pretty sure it would hurt. And he's glad for that, as he wouldn't want to intentionally hurt her. But at the same time, he feels the need to fuck her hard, so he continues to pound into her. His breath is heavy as he watches her, his hand clasped around her neck. Her moans send shivers down his body. He needs that right now, more than anything. He needs to make her his, needs to hear her scream his name.

"Oh god, oh god! Negan!" She screams out as she reaches her second orgasm.

He feels her tightening against him as she comes. Feeling her pulsate against his cock sends him over the edge. His hips lose their rhythm and he slams deep into her as he shoots his hot load inside her, growling primally in her ear.

He rests his head on her breast, his body slumping against hers, his breath heavy.

Rachel runs her fingers through the back of his hair. "Wow," she says, breathlessly.

"I know," Negan says, smiling against her breast. He looks up at her. "I didn't hurt you did i?"

"Not enough to earn you a punch in the face, so we're good," she jokes.

He rests his head down on her breast once again, relieved. "I wouldn't hurt you, Rachel. You know that, right?" He asks.

"Kind of," she answers.

Negan looks up at her, a bemused look on his face. "Kind of?"

She looks at him, sighing gently. "I don't think you'd want to. But i'm not so sure that you wouldn't if you felt you had to," she answers, stroking his face.

"I wouldn't," he says, a pained look crossing his face.

"What if i asked you to," Rachel smiles suggestively, trying to change the subject.

Negan grins from ear to ear. "Well that, would be a whole different ball game."

Rachel giggles. "Come on," she says, patting his back. "I gotta pee."

Negan rolls off her, resting his head on his hand. He watches her walk to the bathroom, his eyes following her ass as she walks. He bites his bottom lip. Watching her ass move like that, he could never imagine harming her in any way whatsoever. But he also knows that she's probably right. He doesn't want her to be, but he knows she probably is. He wants more than ever for her to be wrong. _Then prove her wrong asshole!_ He thinks.

Rachel leaves the bathroom, making her way back to the bed. Negan pulls her in towards him, wrapping his arms around her.

"As nice as this is, i should really head back to my room. I'm knackered," Rachel says.

Negan glances down at her. "You should stay. Keep me warm," he suggests.

"I thought you didn't have anyone spend the night here?" She asks.

"I don't have my wives spend the night, cos i'm worried they might fucking kill me in my sleep," he chuckles.

"What makes you think your safe with me," Rachel jokes.

Negan squeezes her tightly. "Becauses you're like my damn bodyguard, and a sexy one at that."

"Maybe i've just lulled you into a false sense of security," she smiles.

"Hmm, maybe? Fuck it though. If i get to have your sexy ass, hovering over me as i go. Then that's a good way to go," he smiles.

Rachel laughs, burying her face in his chest hair.

They both fall asleep quickly, their bodies entwined.

* * *

A week goes by, and Rachel has never felt better. Things are beginning to settle down at the sanctuary after Dwight's dissapearance. Any doubts she'd had about letting him go, had now gone. She realised that she'd done the right thing.

Things between Negan and her had been great. More than great actually. It still surprised her how capable he was in the bedroom. She always thought he'd be a selfish lover, however, she couldn't have been more wrong.

Rachel sits with Simon on her usual spot on the steps outside. They both eat sandwiches as they watch the walkers on the fence.

"I can see why you sit out here," Simon says through a mouthful of sandwich. "It's therapeutic."

Rachel stares at him, half frowning, half laughing. "I wouldn't exactly call it therapeutic,"

"You know what i mean. You sit out here, eating, and you watch them.. not eating. Reminds you you're winning," he says.

"Good philosophy," Rachel nods.

Something comes through on Simon's radio, it's crackly. "Hate these things," he says, getting up from the step. He walks a few feet away. "This is Simon, can you repeat that, i didn't quite catch it, over," he speaks into the radio.

Rachel watches him from the step. She frowns as his face begins to drop.

"Shit!" She hears him curse from a distance. She walks over as he clips the radio back on his belt.

"What's up?" She asks, worried.

He stares at her, his hand briefly rubbing his moustache. "It's T's group.. they're dead.

Rachel's face drops. "What! How?" She asks, not quite believing the words coming out of his mouth.

Simon shakes his head. "Blown up by the sounds of it. David found them by the side of the road."

Rachel's hand goes to her mouth. She shakes her head in disbelief. "Who.. who did this?"

Simon shrugs. "I don't know. David said he didn't see anyone around. That's not all though," he adds.

"What?" She asks. Not really wanting to know the answer.

"We had some people posted, apparently they had a lead on Dwight. They were attacked. We're not sure if it's the same people who killed T's group. But i'd bet it was," Simon says.

"Jesus," she says. Rachel's eyes widen. "You don't think it was Dwight do you?" She asks.

He shakes his head. "I don't think so, not his style. Negan is gonna be pissed though."

"You want me to go out there? Maybe i can find some tracks? Figure out who did this?" Rachel offers.

"I'd better check with Negan first. To be honest, i'm not so sure he'll want you out there. Not with these maniacs running around," he answers.

Rachel nods. "I just.. i can't believe it. I was just talking to T yesterday. And now he's gone," she says, feeling a lump in her throat.

Simon puts his hand on her shoulder. "Hey, don't you worry. Whoever did this, is gonna pay, that's for sure. We'll find out who they are. One way or another," he assures her.

Rachel stands at the gate. She wants to go out, desperate to find whoever attacked them. Part of her feels guilty. Knowing that if it was Dwight, it wouldn't have happened if she hadn't let him slip away. The more she thought about it though, the more she was sure it wasn't him. Like Simon had said, it didn't seem to be his style. She wasn't sure Dwight had it in him to attack the saviors.

She hears a motorbike in the distance. She automatically thinks of T. For a brief moment, she forgets he's gone.

"Well holy shit!" She hears someone say from behind her.

Rachel glances behind her, seeing Gareth staring through the gate. She turns in the direction he's looking. Her eyes widen. The motorbike slows down as it nears the gate. Dwight climbs off, with Sherry behind him.


	15. Chapter 15

Rachel sits on the edge of her bed smoking a cigarette.

Dwight and Sherry, had been taken straight to the cells, and other than the fact that Tina had died, she hadn't heard a thing since. Negan had returned two hours ago, and she had no idea how he'd reacted to their return. She wonders what he's going to do. She gets up, crossing the room to stump her cigarette out into a coffee cup.

There's a knock at her door. She opens it to find Negan standing there, minus Lucille and his leather jacket. He looks tense.

"You okay?" She asks.

"Not really," he answers, walking past her and sitting on the edge of her bed.

Rachel closes the door and sits beside him. They remain silent for a few moments. "What are you going to do?" Rachel asks, breaking the silence.

Negan huffs lightly. "What would you do, Rachel?"

Rachel looks down at her feet. "I.. i don't know," she answers, honestly.

Negan looks towards the window. "You want me to be honest?"

"Yes," Rachel nods, not sure that she want's that at all.

"I would've killed him. I would've spared Sherry, being a woman and all. I don't like killing women," he says, stroking the beginnings of a beard.

"Why haven't you?" She asks, staring at him.

"A few reasons. You being one of them," he says, looking at her.

"Me?" She says, a confused look crossing her face.

"You're all, sweet and shit," he starts.

"I wouldn't go that far," she jokes half heartedly.

"You know what i mean. I go killing Dwight, and you're gonna go giving me the fucking silent treatment for the next few fucking months. I don't think i can handle that," he says.

"I didn't realise you cared so much," she smiles a little uncomfortably.

Negan raises an eyebrow. "Yeah, well. Don't go getting any ideas. I'm not saying i'm.. you know.. because i'm fucking not, baby," Negan begins.

"Me neither," she interrupts, turning away from him as she says it.

Negan remains silent for a moment, a hurt look crossing his face briefly, then he composes himself. "What i am saying, is that.. i fucking like you. Not just the sex, though that is pretty fucking incredible. But.. you know, i respect you. And i like being around you. You make me laugh, mostly at you of course. But who gives a fuck," he smiles.

Rachel smiles at him. "That's almost kinda sweet."

"Yeah, well. I haven't told you the rest yet," he says, frowning.

"What's the rest then?" She asks.

"Sherry's offered to marry me," he says.

Rachel's eyes widen.

"She said, if i spare Dwight's life, she'll marry me. If you think about it though, i was gonna fucking marry her sister anyway," Negan shrugs.

"Are you for real?" Rachel asks, angrily, getting up from the bed.

"Yeah i'm for real. I don't see the problem. I get another wife, and Dwight lives to see another fucking day. Unless you're jealous," Negan smirks.

Rachel frowns. "This is nothing to do with jealousy, and everything to do with you backing her into a corner!" She yells.

"Hey, i'm not fucking backing her into anything. She asked me!" He defends himself.

She shakes her head. "You really think she'd want to marry you if it wasn't for Dwight?" Rachel asks.

"That's no fucking business of mine, the point is, she's asked me. I thought you'd be happy," he says, furrowing his brows.

Rachel turns away from him, rubbing her temples with one hand. "Why would i be happy Negan?"

"Dwight gets to live," he says.

Rachel walks over to the window. "What the hell am i doing?" She says to herself.

Negan gets up off the bed. "Don't be like that. You knew i had wives, long before we started fucking. I don't see the problem," he says, confused.

She turns to him. "Well no, you wouldn't. This is insane, Negan," she says.

"If you didn't like that, you're not gonna like the next bit," he warns.

Rachel sighs. "What could possibly top that? Dare i ask?"

"I've agreed to spare Dwight's life. But i can't just let him get away with what he did," he starts.

"Well i'd hardly say he's getting away with it, your stealing his wife from him," Rachel says sarcastically.

Negan pulls his face, childishly. "I'm not stealing her, she offered t-,"

"Just get to the point will you!" Rachel snaps.

A stony look takes over his face. "He needs a reminder. Not just for him, but for everyone. People need to know what can happen if they cross me."

"So what then?" She asks.

"He's getting the iron," Negan answers, with no trace of a smile.

Rachel stares at him confused. Then realisation hits her. "No, you can't."

"I can, and i motherfucking will. Side of his face should be enough," Negan says.

Rachel steps closer to him. "You really think that's fair. The guy stole some damn insulin. He didn't murder someone. Jesus Christ!"

Negan steps closer. "Look, it doesn..," Negan sniffs and frowns. "Have you been smoking?" He asks.

"Really? You're talking about burning some guys face off. But me smoking is the big issue?" She snipes.

Negan squints his eyes. "To me it is. It's a disgusting habit. How am i supposed to kiss you if you taste like a damn ashtray?"

"The last thing i want to do right now is kiss you. So you don't need to worry," she says.

Negan smiles at her. "I am so fucking horny for you right now."

"Tough," Rachel says, crossing her arms.

Negan takes a deep breath. "You got me wrapped around your little finger. You know that?"

Rachel looks at him in disgust. "Really? You've got a funny way of showing it."

He stares down at her. "You might not think so, but you have. You name one person that speaks to me the way you do?" He asks.

Rachel remains silent, arms still crossed.

"I let you get away with so much fucking shit, it's unreal," he says.

"Such as?" Rachel questions.

"Have you ever knelt to me once?" He asks.

Rachel looks at her feet.

"Have i ever asked you who you are?" He asks.

Rachel looks up at him with a straight face. "No, you haven't. I've never stopped you from asking though, so why haven't you?" She questions him.

"Because i know what you'll fucking say. And, i know you won't kneel. So i can't fucking ask you. Because if i did, and you didn't say what you're supposed to fucking say, i.. i couldn't let that slide. So i won't ask you," he frowns.

"What do you want me to say? That i'm grateful?" She asks, softly.

"Well you'd fucking think so. But i know you by now. I don't expect that at all. There is one thing i expect from you today though," Negan says.

"What's that?" Rachel asks.

Negan puts his hand on her shoulder. "I want you on the main floor."

"No," she says, shaking her head. "I can't do that, Negan. I can't."

Negan cups her face with his hands. "Yes, you can. My men think you don't kneel, because you're my equal. They respect you. But if you're not their today when i dish out Dwight's punishment. They're going to wonder why that is. And then they're going to question, if you're actually one of us at all."

Rachel's heart pounds in her chest. "You know i can't, Negan," she says, her eyes pleading with him.

He strokes his thumb over her cheek. "If you really can't. Then you shouldn't be here. It's happening in an hour. If you're not there. Then i'll know you've gone," he says.

"That's not fair," she says, her eyes beginning to water.

"Nothing's fair anymore," he says looking at her. Negan pushes her head against his chest and wraps his arms around her. "It's your choice, Rachel. If you choose to go, i won't look for you. But..," he begins. He takes a deep breath, running his fingers through the back of her hair. "I don't want you to go, baby," he says, softly. He kisses her forehead, his mouth lingering. He walks out of the door without saying another word.

Rachel lights another cigarette and paces her room. She knows she should leave. Standing by whilst some guy gets half his face burnt off? That isn't right. And it isn't her. She sticks her head out of the window, her arms resting on the window pane. "Do the right thing, Rachel," she says, to herself, closing her eyes. She flicks the cigarette away.

* * *

Rachel stands in the corridor. She plays with her hands nervously, leaning up against the wall. She heads down the corridor and through the doorway.

She walks slowly, placing her hands on the railings. She observes the main hall before her. The saviors are already gathered there. Negan stands in front of the furnace. Everyone is kneeling before him, except for his wives, and Dwight. Dwight is sat on a chair, his hands tied behind his back.

Negan glances around the main hall, his eyes scanning desperately for Rachel. He looks up, and there she is. The corner of his mouth twitches into a smile briefly. Her eyes meet his for a moment, then she looks down at her feet. He looks away.

"What you are all about to witness is going to be unpleasant. It doesn't have to be, hell, it doesn't even have to happen. Fuck i wish it wouldn't. I wish i could just let this slide..ignore the rules, but i can't. Why?" Negan asks.

"The rules keep us alive," they all say at once.

Rachel stays silent, her hands gripped tightly on the railing.

"That's right," Negan continues. "We survive, we provide security for others, we bring civilization back to this world. We, are the saviors. And we can't do that without rules. Rules, are what make everything work. No matter how small, the rules, have to be followed. You break those rules. And it's the iron for you," he says, his face cold. "Everyone on your feet," he says, motioning with his hand.

Everyone stands.

Rachel watches as Negan places a large glove on his hand.

Negan moves closer to Dwight. Dwight squirms in his seat, his breath heavy, sweat running down his face.

"Sorry, Dwight. But it is what it is," Negan says.

Negan brings the iron down on the left side of Dwight's face.

Dwight's screams fill the main hall. His screams can be heard by the saviors outside on the gate.

Tears stream down Rachel's face. She looks down at Sherry, standing with negan's other wives. Sherry buries her face in her hands as one of Negan's wives comforts her.

Negan removes the iron, Dwight's skin coming away with it as he does.

"Huh, passed out. Pussy," he says to Dwight. He turns to everyone. "This matter is settled. All is forgiven. Dwight will forever bear the shame of his actions on his face. I hope that we have all learned something today. Because i don't fucking ever want to have to do this shit again," he warns. He turns to doctor Carson. "Do your thing doc," he says. Negan glances up at the railings. But Rachel is no longer there.

* * *

Rachel walks to her room, tears coming thick and fast. She hears footsteps behind her.

"Rachel," Negan calls.

She wipes at her tears uselessly as they begin to fall again.

"Hey, Rachel, wait up," he says, grabbing at her arm.

She turns to him, not looking him in the eye.

His face drops a little at the sight of her. "I know that must have been hard to watch, but i'm greatful you were there. It means a lot to me, Rachel," he says, sincerely.

Rachel nods. "Sure," she says, still refusing to look him in the eye.

"Don't be like that, baby," Negan says softly.

"I just stood by, whilst a man had half his face burnt off," she says, lifting her face to meet his. "I'm supposed to be the good guy. I'm supposed to save people."

"Hey, you are good. It's not your fault he broke the rules," Negan assures her.

Rachel looks down again. "I'm tired. I need to go lie down," she says.

"Okay. I'm pretty fucking beat too. We can both turn in, come on," he says, leading her to his room.

Rachel shakes her arm away from his. "No. I think i should sleep in my own room tonight,"

Negan's face drops again. "Are you pissed at me?"

"I just.. i need to be alone right now," she says.

"Rachel, can't we just..," he starts.

"Can you not do that. I did what you wanted. I'm not going anywhere. I just need to be alone for a bit. That's all," she says.

"Okay, you know where i am if you need me," he says.

Rachel nods. "Night," she says, before turning away and going inside her room.

Negan stands there for a few moments, watching her close the door. "Fuck!" He says, under his breath, then heads to his own room.


	16. Chapter 16

Rachel steps quietly through the woods. It would be dark in an hour or so, but she refuses to go back empty handed.

She had been following a trail for the past three hours. A deer, and from the look of it's prints, it was a big one.

Just as she was about to lose hope, she sees it in the distance. It is a big one. She would need help getting it back, that was for sure. She aims her arrow and quickly releases it into the deer's neck.

She removes the radio from her backpack, switching it on. "This is Rachel. I've got a big ass deer, if anyone's in the area, over."

"This is John, just tell us where you're at, i'll have someone come pick it up, over," he responds.

Rachel told him her location, then sat next to the deer. John had told her they'd be fifteen minutes at the most.

The radio crackles beside her. "Rachel, this is Negan. Switch to channel 7, over."

Rachel rolls her eyes. It had been almost three weeks since the incident with Dwight, and though she hadn't given Negan the silent treatment this time, she still hadn't been intimate with him.

She grabs the radio, reluctantly. Switching channels. "What is it? Over," she asks.

"I was worried about you, you've been gone a while," Negan says

Rachel can practically feel his smile through the radio. "Two days is not that long really. Not when you're hunting. Walkers are spooking the animals. Makes it harder to hunt. Didn't want to come back empty handed, over."

"Well i wish you'd at least leave your radio switched on. How the fuck am i supposed to know you're alright?" Negan asks.

"I can't have my radio crackling away when i'm hunting. You know that. And right now, you talking to me could be attracting unwanted attention, over," Rachel answers.

"Are you done out there? You on your way back? Over," he asks.

"Soon as they get here, i'll head back, over and out," she says, switching the radio off before he has a chance to reply.

Rachel had worked her ass off the past three weeks, in an attempt to avoid Negan. She'd volunteered for as many things as she possibly could, and if nothing came up, she'd go out hunting.

Negan had given her some space at first. But after a week, he had grown impatient. And on the second week, they'd argued. He'd knocked on her bedroom door for the millionth time that week. He had said how much he wanted her, that he was frustrated.

Rachel had responded by saying he had seven wive's, and had no reason to be frustrated.

Negan had accused her of being jealous, with that trademark smirk on his face.

Then Rachel had wiped it off by calling him a needy chick. He'd pouted childishly, which Rachel had hated as it had kind of turned her on. Then he had left, and hadn't spoken to her for a whole two days.

Rachel hears walkers in the distance. She stands, readying her bow. They come into the clearing, four of them. She hits all but one of them in the head. Rachel removes her knife, walking towards the fourth. It's tall, too tall for her to reach. She runs behind it and kicks it in the back. The walker falls onto it's stomach, and she squats over it, driving the knife deep into the back of it's skull.

Five minutes later she hears footsteps. It's David and Gareth.

Rachel was grateful that she had her own truck so that she didn't have to ride back with David. She had taken a dislike to him, and she still wasn't quite sure why.

* * *

She wakes the next morning, feeling refreshed. She had her nose deep in a book, when she heard the all too familiar knock on her door. She sighs, placing her book on the coffee table.

"Negan," she says, answering the door.

"Well don't look too fucking pleased to see me," he frowns.

Rachel smiles sarcastically. "Negan, what can i do for you?" She asks.

"Well you could invite me fucking in, that would be great," he smiles.

Rachel steps aside, and Negan sits on the edge of her coffee table.

"You reading this again?" He smirks, holding up Wuthering Heights.

"Yeah, it's a classic," she says, sitting in her chair.

"What the fuck ever. I got you something," he says, grinning.

"What have you got me?" She asks, nonchalantly.

"Here," he says, handing her a small parcel.

"Aww, you wrapped it and everything," she mocks.

"Just fucking open it," he says.

Rachel tears of the paper, and her eyes widen. "How the hell did you get hold of a copy of this?" She smiles, genuinely surprised.

"With great fucking difficulty," he answers.

It's an Arctic Monkeys CD. And if Rachel wasn't still upset about the whole Dwight business, she's pretty sure she would be jumping on him right now.

"You didn't have to do that," she says.

"I know, but i fucking wanted to," he smiles. "Anyway, you can play it when we go out."

"Where we going?" Rachel asks.

"I need to drive out to one of my posts. Got some shit to attend to," Negan says.

"And you need me to go with you because?" Rachel asks.

"Because you're my personal fucking bodyguard, and because i fucking said so. Is that all fucking right with you?" Negan questions.

"Sure," Rachel shrugs.

* * *

They'd been driving for about twenty minutes.

Negan had complained about the music. "I can't understand a goddamn word they're saying," he'd said.

Rachel had ignored him, cranking up the volume, smiling as she mouthed the words.

 _"Drunken monologues, confused because, it's not like i'm falling in love, i just want you to do me no good. And you look like you could,"_ she sings, tapping her fingers against the passenger door.

Negan stares at her, a hungry look in his eyes. He pulls the truck to the side of the road and switches the music off.

"What are you doing?" Rachel asks, frowning.

"I wanted to talk to you, away from the sanctuary," he says.

"So the whole outpost thing?" She asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Bullshit. And don't look at me like. I've missed you, baby," he says, a pained look crossing his face.

"How could you possibly miss me? It's not like i've been ignoring you," Rachel points out.

"You know damn well what i mean," he says, looking her over greedily.

"I'm pretty sure a man with seven wives shouldn't need a mistress," Rachel snorts

Negan grins from ear to ear. "Hey, i never fucking thought of it like that. I guess you are my mistress, aren't you."

"Absolutely not," she says, looking towards the window.

"Come on, baby. My dick's so hard for you right now. I fucking want you so bad, baby," he pleads.

Rachel turns to him, a sardonic look on her face. She tries her best to keep straightfaced, but the look in his eyes makes her feel incredibly hot between her thighs. A mischievous look crosses her face. "You want me?" She asks, seductively.

"Fuck yeah!" Negan replies, licking his lips, his eyes dark with lust.

"Okay. If you catch me, you can have me," she says, opening the car door. She heads towards the woods, leaving her bow and arrows in the car.

"What, hey! Where are you going?" He yells after her. He watches her run into the woods. "Fuck sake," he says, to himself, as he gets out of the car to follow her, leaving Lucille next to Rachel's bow.

* * *

Rachel runs, her long hair trailing wildly behind her. The woods are dense, and she does her best to avoid flailing branches. Her heart beats fast in her chest. And after just four minutes, she has to take a breather, her chest burning a little. _Fuck! I hate when Negan's right!_ She thinks. Knowing full well that her lack of stamina is down to her smoking. She hears Negan yelling her name not far from her. "Fuck, that dude can run fast," she says to herself. then continues to run.

Negan runs after her. He's half angry, half horny. Running around the woods is not his idea of fun, not to mention dangerous. Who know's what they could run into. But he's also horny as hell. _I'm gonna fuck her goddamn brains out!"_ He thinks.

She can hear the pounding of his feet close behind her. She slows purposely. Negan grabs her from behind, her feet kicking up off the ground. He spins her round and pushes her down onto the grass.

Sweat pours off the pair of them, their breaths heavy.

Negan mounts her. He fumbles with his belt then pulls her panties off eagerly, tearing them as he does so.

Rachel gasps as he slams into her. She claws at his jacket, digging her fingers into the leather.

Negan sinks his teeth into her shoulder, huffing with every thrust.

Rachel lifts her hips up to meet his, moaning loudly as he sucks at her neck. She tilts her head back, her orgasm nearing. Something catches her eye.

"Negan," she moans.

"That's it, baby, say my fucking name," he growls.

"No..," she says breathlessly. "Walker," she moans. Trying her best to focus, but struggling as he continues to hit her sweet spot.

Negan lifts his head, continuing to thrust into her as he does. "Fuck," he moans, grabbing the gun from his belt. He aims at the walker, his hips only stopping as he pulls the trigger. The walker drops to the ground, then Negan gets back at it, building up a quick rhythm.

Rachel pulls at the back of his hair, bringing his face to hers.

He kisses her roughly, his tongue swirling over hers.

Rachel moans into his mouth as her orgasm takes her over.

He pulls his face away from hers, watching her as she comes.

"Negan!" She cries out, as she comes hard against him, her legs trembling.

"Jesus, fuck!" Negan groans, as he feels her pulsate against his cock. "Fuck! Rachel!" He cries, as he reaches his own sweet release, coming inside her.

They lie there, trying to get their breath back, breathing in each others air.

Negan runs his hand through her hair. "Oh, Rachel," he says, resting his nose against hers. "You're gonna be the fucking death of me."

Rachel smiles. "Good way to go though."

He looks at her, smiling. "Do you have any fucking idea what you do to me?" He asks, his eyes burning into hers.

"No. I don't," she smiles.

"Good. Because you'd take fucking advantage otherwise," he grins.

"I'll keep that in mind," she smiles, lifting her face up to his and kissing him softly. "We should get back to the truck though, before we draw any more attention," she giggles, tilting her head towards the walker he shot down.

"You mean fucking pervert over there," Negan jokes. "I gotta fucking say. That would totally be me if i turned into one of those dead fucks," he smiles.

Negan stands up, buckling his belt. "For fuck sake!" Rachel curses.

Negan turns to her, surprised to hear her swearing. "What's up?" He asks.

She holds her panties up in front of him. "You tore my underwear," she says, dangling them accusingly in his face.

"What can i say? I was horny," he chuckles.

"Well you owe me a new pair, and not lacy ones either. I don't have time to be pulling lace out of my arse," she says.

Negan laughs, slipping his arm around her waist as they walk back to the truck.


	17. Chapter 17

Rachel rides her motorbike along the road. The wind blowing her ponytail behind her.

She'd been out working with Simon, but they'd finished much earlier than expected. So she'd decided to take the long ride back to the sanctuary, to see what she could see.

She slows her bike to a stop, as she sees the turn off for where her and Negan had gotten stuck in that apartment building. She heads in that direction, wanting to check the place over.

Rachel pulls up at the side of the road, taking her bow from her shoulder. She walks down the street, taking out two walkers. She keeps her ears open, listening out for the telltale sign of a herd. And sure enough, she hears the all too familiar sound of walkers. Maybe not a herd, but a small cluster at the least. She turns to head back to her bike, when she hears a gunshot.

She runs towards the sound, without any thought.

She sees the walkers, heading for an alley. About twelve or so. Then she sees a man, running down the alley, meeting with a dead end. He shoots at one of the walkers, hitting it in the head, then he quickly takes out a second. He aims at a third, but his gun is empty. He pulls out a knife.

Rachel aims her arrow at the walker closest to him, she releases, getting it straight through the eye.

The guy sees the walker drop, a surprised look crossing his face. He glances at her quickly, before turning back to the dead, taking another out with his knife.

Rachel quickly takes out another five, but then she runs out of arrows. Three more walkers remain, so she runs towards the alley, removing her knife from her belt. She drives her knife into the back of one of their skulls, then moves onto the next one, taking it out, as the guy takes the last one.

"You alright?" She asks, trying to get her breath back.

He nods at her. "Thanks to you i am," he smiles.

"Jesus! I thought you were a goner then," she says.

He laughs a little.

"What's so funny?" She asks.

He moves closer to her, holding out his hand. "My name's Paul Rovia, but my friends call me Jesus."

Rachel looks at him, then giggles. "Oh, i see," she smiles, shaking his hand. "I'm Rachel."

"You out here on your own?" He asks.

"Well i was, until i came across you," she smiles.

"Well seriously. I can't thank you enough for what you just did. There's not many people left that would go out of their way to help someone like that," he says.

"Yeah, people can be real arseholes these days," she says, then goes about collecting her arrows.

"You seem like a good person, what with you saving my life just now," he laughs. "I'm part of a community called the hilltop. You're more than welcome to come back with me. We need all the good people we can get."

"Hilltop. Hey, i've heard of hilltop. I think we trade with you," Rachel says.

Jesus looks at her, confused. "Really? I thought you were out here on your own?" He asks.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to mislead you when you asked was i out here alone. I am right now, but i'm part of a much larger group," she answers.

He stares at her, baffled. "That's alright. Our leader Gregory doesn't exactly share everything with me, which group are you with?" He asks.

"The saviors," she says.

His face drops. "You're with the saviors?"

"Yeah," she says. "Wow, your face is saying a lot right now. What is it?" Rachel asks.

"It's just. You're not like any savior i've come across before," he answers.

Rachel frowns a little. "What does that mean? You had a problem with us or something? I know a lot of Negan's men can be quite...rough around the edges..."

"Well that's putting it lightly," Jesus interrupts.

"Look, if Negan's men have acted out of line, then just tell me," she says.

Jesus looks at her. He wonders how she can be so strong, and yet so naive at the same time. "How long have you been with the saviors?" He asks.

"I don't know. About two and a half months, maybe three," she answers.

"Look, you seem alright. But your people," Jesus shakes his head. "I gotta go." He says.

"Wait. You can't just say that then walk off like it's nothing. What about my people?" She asks.

"It doesn't matter," he says, walking away.

"Hey! It does matter! Hey!" She shouts after him.

Jesus disappears into the woods.

"Shit!" Rachel says to herself, kicking at the ground.

She walks over to her motorbike, and heads back to the sanctuary.

* * *

Rachel drives her bike through the gate. She sees Simon.

"Hey, is Negan here?" She asks, walking over to him.

"Yeah, he's in his room. He gave me shit you know," Simon says.

"Shit? What for?" She asks.

"Because we came back without you," he answers.

Rachel tuts. "What's the big deal?" She frowns.

Simon's face softens. "He worries about you, that's all."

Rachel stares at him, then looks at the ground. "Oh. Well i'm sorry if i got you into trouble."

"Don't worry about me. Anyway, Negan knows by now that you never do what you're told," he laughs.

"That's not true, i do what i'm told all the time...you know, when i'm working," she smiles.

"Yeah, yeah," Simon grins.

"I'll go see him. Wait, is he...alone?" She asks, grimacing a little.

"Yeah, he's alone," Simon smiles.

* * *

Rachel stands at Negan's bedroom door. She knocks in spite of what Simon said, not wanting to walk in on something she really wishes she hadn't. The thought of that, makes her feel sickly.

"Come in," Negan calls.

Rachel walks through the door.

His eyes light up upon seeing her. "Hey beautiful," he says, getting out of his seat. "I was worried about you. Why didn't you come back with the others?" He adds, putting his arms around her waist, and planting a kiss on her forehead.

"I wanted to take the scenic route," she says.

"I wish you fucking wouldn't, makes me nervous as shit," he says.

"Well i'm fine," she assures him.

Negan sits back down on the sofa. "Yeah, well. It doesn't stop me from fucking worrying," he smiles. He picks up a black book, and begins writing in it.

Rachel sits in the chair opposite. "So i met someone today," she says.

"Really, who?" He asks, his head still in his book.

"Someone from hilltop," she says.

Negan stops writing, he looks up at her. "Hilltop. What were you doing near hilltop?"

"I wasn't near hilltop. They must have been out looking for supplies or something. What's the deal with hilltop?" She asks.

He stares at her, biting at his cheek. "We trade with them, you know that," he answers.

"What do we trade?" Rachel asks.

"Who exactly did you come across?" He asks.

"You can't answer my question with another question. Politicians do that, and you know why they do that? Because they're lying arseholes," she points out.

Negan smiles a little. "You think i'm a lying asshole?"

"Well you still haven't answered my question, so it doesn't look promising," she says.

"We offer them protection, in return, they give us supplies," he says.

"Protection?" She says, confused.

"Yeah, protection. Not everyone is a fucking badass like you sweetheart. We keep them safe from the dead fucks, and safe from any other groups that might want what they have," he says.

"The guy i met seemed more than capable of looking after himself...well for the most part," Rachel says,

Negan frowns. "What does that mean?"

"He got cornered by walkers, so i helped him," she says.

Negan gets up from his seat. "Jesus, fucking, Christ, Rachel! Let me fucking guess, he was out fucking numbered, so you decide to risk your ass for some fucking idiot you don't even fucking know, am i right?"

"Hey, i did the exact same thing for you remember," she points out, getting up from her seat.

"What's this assholes name?" He asks.

"Well i'm not gonna tell you that, am i. Anyway, it doesn't matter who he is. What does matter, is how he looked at me, when i told him i was a savior," she frowns.

Negan smiles. "You called yourself a savior?"

"Well yeah. Look, stop bloody grinning at me like that, it's distracting," she says.

Negan walks towards her. "Why? Do you like it when i look at you like that? Does it make you wet?" He smirks.

"Stop trying to change the subject," she says, trying not to smile.

"Look, can we not argue. It would be really fucking nice, if we could go a full week without falling out. The leader of the hilltop is fine with the deal that we have, he just wants to keep his people safe, and he needs our help to do that. So don't get mad at me, i hate when you're fucking mad at me," he pouts childishly, wrapping his arms around her.

Rachel rolls her eyes. Before she can get any words out, Negan stops her with a kiss. He kisses her deeply, pulling at her hair. He walks her over to the bed, laying her down, then crawling on top of her.

"My dick is so fucking hard right now," he whispers in her ear.

"Negan, we can't," she says, her hands cupping his face.

"Don't be like that baby," he frowns, pulling her hands away from his face, and pinning them to the bed. He kisses at her neck.

"Negan, i've got my period," Rachel says.

He lifts his head to look at her. "Well i don't mind, if you don't," he grins, licking his lips.

"Really?" She asks, raising an eyebrow.

"You telling me you've never done that before? Women are supposed to be even more sensitive down there when it's that time of the month, you'll fucking love it baby," he smiles.

"I didn't say i'd never done it before," she smiles. "Just not right now though, i keep getting cramps."

Negan buries his head against her shoulder, sighing.

Rachel pushes him off her, sitting up. "Doesn't mean i can't do something for you," she smiles suggestively.

Negan grins from ear to ear, as she unbuckles his belt. He stands in front of her, as she sits on the edge of the bed. Rachel releases his cock, running her hand over it's length. She runs her tongue, all the way from the base, to the tip. Rachel swirls her tongue, teasingly, over his head. Negan hitches his breath, holding the back of her head. She takes half of him in her mouth, rolling her tongue as she does.

"Oh, fuck! That feels so good baby," he groans, grasping at her hair.

Rachel moves her head backwards and forwards, taking as much of him as she can. Her mouth salivates, creating the perfect lubricant.

"Oh, Rachel," Negan moans. He moves his hips in time with her mouth.

Rachel takes her hand from the base of his cock, grabbing at his hip.

Negan gets carried away, and slams his hips against her face. Rachel gags, and her eyes instantly fill with water.

"Jesus Negan!" She says, stopping for a moment, wiping at her eyes. "I can't fucking take you all, i'm not Linda bloody Lovelace," she jokes.

"My wives don't seem to have a problem," he smirks. His face drops, as he realises what he just said.

Rachel stares at him. "You seriously did not just say that," she says.

"I'm sorry, i didn't mean that," he says sincerely.

She pushes him away from her, as she gets up from the bed. "Jesus Negan!" She yells.

"Come on Rachel, i didn't fucking mean it, it just slipped out," Negan says, grabbing at her arm.

"Fuck you!" She shouts, opening the door.

"Rachel, please don't go. What the fuck am i supposed to do with this?" He says, pointing at his erection.

She turns to him. "Maybe you should go and get one of your wives to see to it. Since they know how to handle it better than i can!" She snarls, slamming the door as she leaves.

"Rachel! Rachel!" He shouts after her. "Fuck!" He says to himself. His dick is still erect, looking up at him accusingly. "Fuck you looking at? Asshole," he says, tucking himself back into his pants.

* * *

Rachel lies down on her bed, her head resting against a pillow. Tears roll down her face. She wipes at them angrily. She's more angry at herself than she is at Negan. She thought she was handling the whole, seven wives, thing. Turns out she's not. She hears a knock at her door.

"Go away," she says.

"I'm sorry sweetheart," Negan says from beyond the door.

"Go, away!" She repeats.

She hears the handle turning, and she's thankful that she's facing away from the door.

Negan closes the door behind him, walking towards the bed.

"I told you to go away," Rachel says, sniffling slightly.

"Rachel, i'm sorry," he says, sitting on the edge of the bed beside her.

"I don't care," she says.

"Are you crying?" Negan asks, a little surprised.

"No," she answers.

"Yes you are," he says, leaning over her.

Rachel buries her head into the pillow. "If i'm crying, it's not because of you. It's because i've got cramps," she lies, her voice muffled.

Negan's face drops. The sudden realisation that maybe he's more than just a fuck to her, making him feel all warm inside. He rubs her shoulder. "Look, Rachel. You know what i'm like. I'm a fucking asshole. I just, let shit slip out at times. I don't want to see you upset baby."

"I'm not upset, i told you. I've got cramps," she says.

Negan smiles a little. "Okay. Well you want me to get you anything? I could get you some painkillers?" He offers.

"No, i'll be fine," Rachel says.

Negan lies down beside her, spooning her. He wraps his arm around her, and puts his hand over her stomach.

"What are you doing?" She asks, lifting her head from the pillow.

"I'm helping you," he says, rubbing his hand over her stomach.

"why?" She questions.

"Because i fucking want to, now quiet the fuck down, this is supposed to fucking relax you," he smirks.

Rachel rests her head again. His body against hers, making her heart beat faster.

They lie in silence for a few minutes.

"Is it okay if i rub myself up against you?" Negan asks.

"What? No," Rachel says.

"Okay, okay. Just thought i'd fucking ask. How about once you've fallen asleep? Is that okay?" He says.

"No," Rachel smiles. "And stop trying to make me laugh, i'm still mad at you," she adds.

"Okay, i'll be quiet," Negan smiles.

Negan falls asleep within ten minutes. Rachel can hear him snoring lightly against her. His hand still rests against her stomach, and she places her hand over his. She pushes her body closer against his, reveling the heat coming off him. She can feel his heart beating against her, as she closes her eyes.

She falls asleep.


	18. Chapter 18

_Rachel runs through the woods, her hair trailing behind her. Branches whip at her thighs, grabbing at her as she passes by. She can hear Negan behind her, his breath heavy. She slows, wanting him to catch her. Rachel glances back at him, and her face drops. His eyes are dark, and not with lust. They are devoid of emotion, blank and heartless. He holds Lucille with one hand, swinging her with every step. Rachel begins to panic, her heart pounding in her chest. She tries to speed up, but her legs won't do what her brain demands of them. She can feel her thighs beginning to burn, and every step is a constant struggle. She tells herself not to turn around again. She knows that if she does that, he'll pounce on her. But she turns anyway. He's gone. "Negan?" She says. She heads back in the direction she was going, but there he is, right in front of her. Rachel falls to the ground. She leans up on her elbows, trying to scramble backwards. "Negan, please, don't," she begs._ _Negan looks at her coldly, not saying a word. He holds Lucille high above his head._

 _"I'm sorry, forgive me," he says, showing no emotion. Then he brings Lucille down._

* * *

Rachel wakes with a start, her breath heavy. It's pitch dark in her bedroom, and her eyes struggle to adjust.

"I'm sorry," Negan says.

Rachel feels gooseflesh cover her entire body, her heart pounding in her chest. She turns to Negan, and relaxes a little. He's still sleeping beside her, fully clothed.

"I'm sorry," he repeats.

Rachel hovers above him. It wasn't unusual for Negan to talk in his sleep. One night out of every four or so, he'd wake Rachel with his ramblings. Rachel would normally wrap an arm around him, and stroke his hair soothingly, then he'd quiet down.

Negan's legs began to twitch, and a pained look came over his face.

"Forgive me."

Rachel wrapped her arm around his waist, and stroked his hair.

"Lucille?" He seemed to question.

Rachel strokes his cheek, her nose touching his. "I forgive you," she says softly, kissing him gently on his forehead. Negan appeared to relax at the sound of her words. He always did. Rachel wasn't entirely sure who Lucille was. But if she had to guess, she'd say it was Negan's wife from before. She'd guessed that, long before he'd called out Lucille's name in his sleep. Rachel didn't ask about her, thought it was best that way. It was obvious to Rachel, that Negan was still struggling with losing her. Because even now, he still clung onto her, in the form of his baseball bat. Refusing to let her go. As much as it saddened Rachel, to see Negan being plagued with bad dreams, it also made her feel better about him. Made him seem more human. Knowing that he loved someone so much, that he still dreamt of them to this day. He must have a heart after all. Not that she was stupid enough to believe his heart was hers. But maybe he did care about her. She settles down again beside him, and drifts off to sleep.

* * *

"Morning beautiful," Negan smiles.

Rachel's eye's flicker open. Negan lies in front of her, leaning on his elbow. "How long have you been awake?" She asks with a smile.

"Ten minutes maybe? I was watching you sleep," he grins.

"Well that's not creepy," she says, raising an eyebrow.

Negan chuckles, and kisses her forehead. He swings his legs over the bed, and grabs his boots.

"Where you going?" She asks, propping her head up on her hand.

Negan turns his head to her, a surprised look on his face. "Woah, what the fuck was that?"

"What the fuck was what?" She replies, confused.

"You asking where i'm going, it sounded kinda needy," he smiles.

"You fucking wish," she says, throwing a pillow at him.

Negan laughs. "I got stuff to do, busy fucking day today. I think Dwight's ready," he says. pulling on his boots.

"Ready for what?" Rachel asks.

"To be a savior," Negan says.

"Really? You're gonna ask him?" Rachel frowns skeptically.

Negan turns to her. "You don't think i should?"

"No," she answers, shaking her head. "I think you should just exile him."

"What, so he can fucking attack us at some point? Do you really want to be looking over your damn shoulder all the time?" He asks.

"I'm always looking over my shoulder," Rachel points out.

"Fair fucking point. Still though, there's no need to create problems for yourself," he says.

"I think this is creating a problem for yourself. Just listen to me for a minute okay," she says, placing her hands on his shoulders.

"Okay," he says, rolling his eyes.

"You go through with this, you make him one of your soldiers. Maybe he's a good soldier for a while, but it won't last. You stole his wife, you burned half his face off, you humiliated him, and you locked him in a cell. Even dogs will only take so much shit before they eventually bite you. This, is gonna bite you in the ass, i guarantee it," Rachel says.

Negan puts his hands on her waist. "Dwight is a fucking pussy, he's just fucking grateful to be alive. If he does something stupid, then that'll be the end for him," he smiles. Negan pulls her close to him, kissing her deeply. He rubs his nose against hers. "Don't worry about it baby," he smiles. He gets up off the bed. "I'll see you later," he says, before walking out the door.

* * *

Rachel browses the bookshelf in Negan's room, hoping to find something half decent to read. She comes out empty handed. Sherry is stood against the bar, with what looks like a glass of whiskey in her hand. Rachel gives her a polite nod, then heads for the door.

"You really think you're something don't you," Sherry snipes.

"I'm sorry?" Rachel says, stopping in her tracks.

"You should be," Sherry says, glaring at her.

"And what should i be sorry for Sherry?" Rachel asks, moving towards her.

Negan is just outside the door, listening.

"You try and make out like you're a good guy, but you're not. You're just as bad as the rest of them," Sherry sneers.

"How's that then Sherry?" Rachel asks, raising an eyebrow.

"You think you're better than them, but you're not. You think you're better than his wive's, but you're not. The only difference between you, and us? Is you give yourself to him for free," Sherry smirks.

"Watch your mouth," Rachel says, trying to remain calm.

"What's the matter, did i hit a nerve? Truth hurts right. He'll never love you, no matter how much you want him too. You're just another notch on his bedpost," Sherry sneers.

Rachel smiles, not taking the bait. "You're right. You think i'm stupid Sherry? I know he'll never love me. Quite frankly, i couldn't give two shits, because he's just a notch on mine. I'm fine with what Negan and i have. You on the other hand, are obviously not," Rachel says.

"Say what you want, but you're weak, and you're just like the rest of them," Sherry says.

Rachel laughs. "I'm weak? Me? Darling. Look at where you are, take a look around you. You, are where you are right now, because you're weak. You're here, because you were too weak, and too fucking stupid, to make it out there on your own," Rachel says, moving right in front of Sherry's face. "You came back here, knowing your husband would most likely die, and you think i'm weak?"

Sherry stares at her, quite clearly having nothing to say to that.

"You ever talk to me like that again, i'll break that pretty little face of yours," Rachel warns, then she heads through the double doors.

Negan steps behind the door as she opens it, staying out of sight. A smile on his face. "That's my girl," he says to himself. Once Rachel is out of sight, he heads through the doors.

Sherry looks up at him, sipping from her glass.

"My dear wife, we need to have a word," Negan smiles.

"What about?" Sherry asks, taking another sip of her whiskey.

Negan grabs the glass from her hand, and downs the rest of it. He places it on the bar, and sits on the stool in front of her. "I just heard your little conversation with Rachel," he says.

"What we talk about whe.." she starts.

"Yeah, yeah, i've heard it all before sweetheart. You see Sherry, i'll let you get away with talking to me like shit. I mean, you're my fucking wife, it comes with the territory. As long as you continue to please me, then we're all fucking good," Negan smiles. He places his hand under her chin, bringing his face closer to hers. His face changes, void of humour. "Rachel, is not my wife. She doesn't have to please me, but she does anyway, asking for nothing in return. I respect her. She isn't just a fucking notch on my bedpost, she's one of my most valuable soldiers, and she's my fucking girl, and i'd take one of her, over ten of you, any fucking day of the week. You, don't get to talk to her like that, you understand?" He asks, his eyes cold.

Sherry nods.

"What was that?" Negan asks.

"I understand," Sherry says,

"Good. Because if i ever catch you speaking to her like that again, i'll divorce your ass, and i'll throw Dwighty boy, straight into the fucking furnace," Negan warns her. "We clear on that?"

"Yes, we are," Sherry replies, glancing at the ground.

"Good," Negan smiles.

* * *

Rachel waits outside Dr Carson's office. She can hear muffled voices from within, and then footsteps advancing towards the door. The door swings open, and she sees Dwight.

"Just apply this cream, twice a day. It should help you to heal better, prevent infection," Dr Carson says, handing Dwight a tube.

"Thanks doc," Dwight says. Dwight looks directly at Rachel. "Rachel," he nods.

"Dwight," she nods back.

He walks off.

"Come on in," Dr Carson says.

Rachel heads inside, sitting on a chair in front of his desk.

"What can i do for you?" He asks.

"I need some nicotine gum or something," Rachel says.

"How long have you gone without?" He asks.

"Couple of weeks, but if i don't get some nicotine, i'm either gonna bite someone's head off, or smoke," she answers.

"You don't want to try the patches?" He asks.

"No, they take forever to work, i'm too impatient. I'll go cold turkey again, it's just..stress, you know," Rachel says.

Dr Carson nods. He gets out of his seat, and makes his way to one of the cabinets. "Here," he says, handing her a box of nicotine gum. "If you change your mind about the patches, you know where i am."

"Thanks doc," she says, getting out of her seat.

* * *

She heads back to her room, already chewing on a piece of gum. She glances over at her bed, her eyes widening as she sees a package laid upon it. A cup on her bedside table catches her eye, as it's filled with purple, and yellow, wild flowers. Rachel smiles, walking over to the edge of her bed. She sits down, smelling at the flowers. She turns around, taking the package in her hands. It's a small gift box, a pretty red bow is wrapped around it. Rachel pulls at the bow, and removes the lid. It's a silver locket, in the shape of a heart. It's beautiful. She takes it gently out of the box. Rachel opens the locket, and giggles. Negan, has already put a picture of himself inside. She goes to her mirror, putting the necklace on, a smile glued to her face.

* * *

Rachel knocks on Negan's door.

"Come in," he calls from within.

Rachel walks in, closing the door behind her.

"Hey beautiful," he smiles.

Rachel walks straight over to him. She leans down, and kisses him, her hand around his neck.

"I guess you like the necklace then?" He says against her lips.

"Oh wait, was that from you?" She teases.

Negan pulls her onto his lap, grinning.

"It's beautiful," she smiles.

"That's enough about the picture inside, what do you think of the fucking necklace?" Negan jokes.

"The flowers are beautiful too, you get one of your men to pick those?" She asks.

Negan wraps his arms around her waist. "Hey, i picked every single one of those fucking flowers myself, thank you very fucking much," he announces proudly.

"You did not?" She accuses, smiling.

"I fucking damn well did," he smiles.

Rachel stares at him, longingly. Wishing she could have him right now. "Well, that's just sweet. You should be careful though, you have a reputation to uphold," she smiles.

"Hmm, i'll keep that in fucking mind," he grins, running his hand over her back. "Are you gonna stay the night?" He asks.

"Do you want me to stay the night? I mean, it's not like we can do stuff," she points out.

Negan smiles at her. "Oh, there's plenty of fucking stuff we could do sweetheart. But either way, i like having you here with me. So stay," he says, his eyes looking a little needy.

Rachel strokes the side of his face, her hand running up into his hair. "Of course," she says, resting her head against his chest.


	19. Chapter 19

"I thought maybe we could go out on a run today, just the two of us," Negan suggests.

Rachel lifts her head from his chest. "Why just the two of us?" She asks.

"What's the matter? You don't like being alone with me or something?" Negan smiles.

"I'm alone with you right now aren't i? It's just, every time we go out on a run, just the two of us, we either come across a herd, or we end up...you know," Rachel smiles.

"I do fucking know, why the fuck do you think i want just the two of us," Negan grins, brushing his hand through her hair.

"Ha ha. But seriously, we never come back with anything," she points out.

"We come back with each other, that's a pretty good fucking run in my opinion," Negan says.

"That is so cheesy," Rachel laughs.

"Cheesy, or sweet?" Negan smiles, biting on his lip.

"Cheesy," Rachel giggles.

Negan runs his fingers down her back, resting his hand against her bare ass. "You wanna go then?" Negan asks.

"Of course i do. Just, try and make sure we come back with something other than ourselves this time," Rachel says.

"Hmm," Negan murmurs, as he nuzzles her neck. "We can go in like, an hour or some shit," he says, hovering above her.

Rachel runs her hand over the back of his neck, pulling his face close to hers. She kisses him deeply, moaning against his mouth.

"Make that two hours," Negan smiles.

* * *

They head out in a pick up truck. Rachel sits in the passenger seat, singing along to Arctic Monkeys. Negan had found her a second album, much to his own annoyance, as he apparently hated them. Though Rachel questioned that, as she could have sworn he'd had them playing when he got back from a run the other day.

 _"Oh that boy's a slag. The best you ever had, the best you ever had, is just a memory, and those dreams, weren't as daft as they seem, not as daft as they seem, my love, when you dream them up.. Flicking through a little book of sex tips, remember when the..."_ she sings.

Negan glances at her every so often, a content smile on his face. He glances at the dashboard. "What the fuck?" He frowns.

Rachel stops singing. "What's wrong?" She asks.

"It's running on fucking empty. I filled the fucker just before we left," he says frustratedly.

Negan brings the car to a stop, getting out to take a look.

"For fuck fucking sake!" Negan frowns.

"What is it?" Rachel asks, getting out of the passenger side.

"It's fucking pissing everywhere," he says, kicking at the wheel. "Stupid piece of shit!"

"We'll just have to walk back," Rachel says.

Negan pinches the bridge of his nose. "We've been driving for almost a fucking hour!" He stresses.

"Alright, don't bite my bloody head off. It was your idea to come out here in the first place, i told you it was a bad idea," Rachel says.

"Don't fucking do that," Negan huffed.

"Do what?" Rachel asks.

"Say i fucking told you so," Negan says, rubbing his temples.

"Well i did," Rachel answers, raising her arms either side of her.

"What did i just say?" Negan snaps.

"Hey, don't get snappy with me!" Rachel scolds.

Negan walked closer to her. "You know, i'm starting to see fucking why we attract herds," he points out.

"Yeah, you and your big mouth, they can hear you for miles," she sneers.

"Hey, don't go thinking just because your hot, that you can talk to me like that," Negan warns her.

Rachel scowls at him. She turns round, and begins to walk back the way they came.

"where are you going?" Negan shouts after her.

"Away from you!" She snaps back.

Negan watches her leaving. "Fuck sake!" He yells. He grabs Lucille from the car, and follows Rachel.

They walk along the road in silence. Negan idly swinging Lucille as he walks. They hear a rustling in the trees. A single walker.

"I got this," Negan smiles. He raises Lucille, about to swing, when an arrow goes through it's eye. He turns to Rachel. "That is so, not, fucking cool."

Rachel smiles, taking the arrow from the walker's head.

Negan smiles, in spite of himself. "Don't do that again, next one's fucking mine," he orders.

"Yeah yeah," Rachel says, rolling her eyes.

They walk side by side. Negan wraps his arm around her waist. "I'm sorry i snapped at you," he pouts.

Rachel turns her head to him as she walks. "So you should be," she says.

"Come on," he says, leaning down to nuzzle at her neck. "You can't stay fucking mad at me forever. I'm too fucking adorable."

Rachel giggles. "You're such a dick."

"You love my what?" He smiles.

Rachel elbows him playfully in the ribs. Negan laughs, and Rachel's heart melts at the sound of it.

Negan kisses her softly. "You drive me fucking crazy, you know that?" He whispers against her ear.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Rachel smiles innocently.

"Hmm, i bet you fucking don't," Negan practically groans against her ear, still holding onto her waist.

Rachel begins to feel the all too familiar heat between her thighs. "Negan, stop it. We're supposed to be looking for stuff," she smiles.

Negan looks at her. "Well you're no fun," he pouts childishly.

Rachel laughs. "Walker," she says, pointing towards the trees.

Negan heads over to it, and splatters it's head with Lucille. Two more walkers come out of the woods.

Rachel goes to pull her bow from her shoulders. When she sees another, and another. "Negan!" She yells.

Negan turns around. "Shit!" He curses, swinging at them.

Rachel runs towards him, stabbing one of the walkers through the head. "Come on, this way!" She shouts, grabbing his hand.

They run into the woods on the opposite side of the road. They're faced with more walkers. "Jesus fucking Christ!" Negan shouts. "They're fucking everywhere! This way," he says, finding a gap between the dead.

They both run through the woods, trying to put some distance between themselves and the dead, but they're everywhere.

"There!" Negan shouts, pointing Lucille ahead of them, as he sees a clearing.

They come out of the woods, finding a small derelict town. But the dead have claimed it, and it crawls with them. "Fuck!" Negan curses.

They run inside a building, Negan attempting to find something, anything, to barricade the doors. He grabs a microphone stand, pushing it through the handles of the door, probably only buying them minutes.

They run through what looks like a large function room. The windows are way too high for them to reach, so they head for the emergency exit. Negan bangs against the doors. His face drops. "It's fucking welded shut. What the fuck!"

"Up here!" Rachel shouts, heading up onto a stage. They pull at the large black stage curtain. The windows at the back of the stage, are the same as those below, they're too high up. "What do we do?" Rachel panics.

Negan leans against the wall panting. He can hear the dead, straining at the double doors. He knows it's only a matter of time before they break through. Negan grabs two huge speakers from the side of the stage, and places them below the window. He stands on them, resting his hands against the wall. "Climb up on my shoulders, you should be able to reach the window!" He shouts, facing the wall.

Rachel stares at him. "But, i won't be able to get help in time, those things are gonna break through, what about you?" she says.

"Never fucking mind me. Come on, you're wasting time," he says, still facing the wall.

Rachel's heart pounds. She stands frozen on the spot, and yet she feels like she's falling. "No," she says, tears beginning to fill her eyes.

Negan turns his head to her. "What? Look, stop fucking around, and get on my damn shoulders!" He orders.

"No! I won't! And you can't make me!" She yells.

Negan steps off the speaker. "Rachel.." Negan begins.

"No! I'm not leaving you here to die alone!" She shouts. Rachel tries to compose herself, wiping her tears away with the back of her hand. "We'll fight those fuckers together. And if we die doing it? Then we go down fucking fighting, right?"

Negan swallows deeply. His own eyes begin to brim slightly. Luckily for him, Rachel can't see, as her eyes are the same. "We go down fighting," Negan smiles. He walks over to her, and kisses her deeply, running his hand through her hair. Rachel grabs at his neck, not wanting to let go. She does though, as does Negan.

"We're not dead yet," Rachel smiles. "Let's see if we can keep it that way."

She walks to the front of the stage, looking over at the double doors. The microphone stand is ready to snap, it's a wonder it's held for so long. Rachel scans the stage. "Grab those speakers," she says.

Negan runs towards the back of the stage, and brings the speakers over. "What we gonna do? Plug these bad boys in and sing them to fucking death?" He frowns.

"This stage is pretty high. There's only two ways they can get on, and that's by the steps either side. We block each one with a speaker, they'll still get on, but hopefully it'll slow them down," Rachel says, feeling more hopeful.

"Fuck you're smart! I'm so fucking happy you're such a smartass!" Negan smiles.

"I'll remind you of that, if we make it out," she smiles.

Negan grins. "Even with these, we can still only take out so many before they overwhelm us. You got another plan?"

"Yeah, get as much walker crap on you as you can," Rachel says.

"Why the fuck didn't i think of that?" He frowns.

The doors burst open, walkers filling the hall. They head straight for the stage. Rachel was right, the stage is too high for the dead. But it doesn't take them long to find the steps on either side.

Negan and Rachel stand back to back. Rachel with her knife in her hand, and Negan brandishing Lucille. Luckily, the steps aren't that wide, only allowing them two at a time. The dead stumble over one another, eager for fresh meat.

Rachel's heart pounds, her skin covered in gooseflesh. She can't remember a time when she was this frightened. She tries to use that, as her reason to live, when she knows deep down, her reason to live, is standing behind her.

Negan unzips his jacket. His shirt clings to his body, saturated with sweat. He very rarely feels real fear like this. The odds are against them, he knows that. But fuck if he's going to go down without a fight. Negan turns that fear, into pure adrenaline, aiming it towards the dead.

The dead stumble over the speakers, two on each side. Rachel stabs them straight through the head. Whilst Negan quickly takes the one's on his side with Lucille.

Rachel attempts to grab one of the walkers, hoping to cut into it. But there's no time, as another two fall over the speaker. Negan finds himself in the same predicament. As Rachel stabs at the walkers, another one is making it's way over the speaker, it falls, taking the speaker with it. "Shit!" She yells.

"What is it?" Negan shouts, turning round.

"The speaker dropped. Don't turn around Negan, stick to your side, or they'll be all over us!" She shouts.

He nods, turning back to deal with the ever growing dead on his side. _Fuck! Please don't let me lose her!_ He thinks. Anger begins to take him over, as he swings Lucille repeatedly at the dead, blood splattering everywhere.

Rachel moves closer to the steps, kicking at the walker in front. Luckily it stumbles backwards, creating a domino effect with the dead behind it. She kneels down, plunging her knife into a walker's stomach, pulling at it's guts. A walker makes it's way towards her. She drops the guts, and stabs at it, getting it in the neck. Struggling to get the knife out, she grapples with it, as another closes in on her.

Negan swings at it, it's brains splattering over Rachel's face. She removes her knife from the walker's neck, and plunges it into it's skull. Rachel doesn't bother reminding Negan to stick to his side, as she would have done the same for him.

"Push the bodies in front of the steps, stop more coming through!" She shouts, as she drags one of the dead towards the steps. It works, as a walker stumbles over it. Rachel sends her knife through it's temple, then kicks at a walker coming up the steps, sending it falling backwards. She piles up as many bodies as she can, creating a barrier.

Negan does the same on his side, adrenaline coursing through his veins.

The stage is a mess of congealed blood, guts, brains, and god knows what else. Rachel kneels down, digging deep into a walker's stomach, rubbing it's insides all over her arms and chest. She grabs a handful of guts, wrapping them round her neck like some kind of macabre necklace, the stench making her gag. Her socks are saturated with walker crap, falling to her shins.

Negan slices open one of the dead with his knife, pulling at it's guts. His grey trousers, are now a dark maroon, oozing with walker crap. Sweat drips from his hair, as he plunges his knife deep into the walker's remains.

Walkers clamber over the makeshift barricade of the dead, stumbling their way over.

Negan lifts his head. "They're still fucking coming for us! I don't think it's working!" He yells.

Rachel glances at the dead. She stands, ramming her knife straight through the walker's eye. Negan swings Lucille at the two on his side, putting an end to them.

"It will work, we're just not acting very dead right now," she assures him. "Come on!" She shouts, heading behind the curtain.

Negan follows her. "What the fuck are you doing? They'll fucking build up and rip us to pieces!" He shouts.

Rachel grabs a hold of him. "This is the only chance we've got. They're confused, we smell like them, but we're not acting like them. Let them come to us, hopefully they won't know the difference," she whispers, her voice trembling slightly.

"That's all you've got?" Negan frowns, his face dropping.

"That's all i've got," she nods, gripping his arms.

Negan looks at her, his heart pounding against his chest. He brings his hand up to her face, then nods his head. "Okay, let's fucking do this," he whispers.

"We need to keep quiet, not a word. Keep hold of my hand, and don't let fucking go," she smiles half heartedly.

"Never," Negan promises, smiling at her.

They stand behind the curtain, their fingers entwined, hearing the sounds of the dead coming towards them.

Rachel squeezes his hand, and Negan returns the gesture.

The dead fill the stage, breaking their way through the curtains, making their way towards them.

Negan and Rachel remain still, as the dead walk towards them, going against every instinct they have. Their bodies scream at them to run, and it takes every ounce of strength, not to do just that.

The dead find them, their heads twitching, searching for the meal they were so sure had been there. They continue on, stumbling past Negan and Rachel.

Negan pulls at her hand, slowly making his way back onto the stage. They observe the scene before them. A sea of walkers, fills the room before them. Negan makes his way to the walker barricade, stepping over the bodies, trying his best not to stumble.

Rachel is right by his side, her right hand holding his tightly, her knife clenched in the other, by her side.

They make their way down the steps, their bodies pressing against the dead, as they attempt to slowly make their way through them.

The double doors seem a million miles away. Rachel can't see them at all, her tiny frame engulfed by the dead. Negan can see them though, it's all he sees, blocking out the dead fucks from his mind.

Rachel comes face to face with a walker. She winces as it sniffs at her, it's mouth within biting distance. A tear falls down her cheek, and she closes her eyes, trusting Negan to lead her out of there.

Negan turns his head to Rachel, a pained look on his face. He squeezes her hand reassuringly, and continues on. He can feel the wind blowing in slightly through the doors, as they get closer. As he nears the exit, he can see hordes of the dead outside. _Jesus Christ!_ He thinks.

They're out of the venue now, but still amongst the sea of dead. Negan leads them the way they came, through the trees.

Rachel opens her eyes, and breathes a sigh of relief, as the dead begin to thin out.

They continue walking slowly, in silence. Once they put some considerable distance between themselves and the walkers, they quicken their pace, not stopping till they reach their truck.

Negan places Lucille against the back of the truck, and throws his arms around Rachel, squeezing her tightly. Rachel wraps her arms around his neck, not quite believing that they made it out of there.

Negan releases her. "Why did you do that? Why didn't you go when i told you?"

Rachel looks up at him. "I. I don't know. I just, i just couldn't," she shakes her head, tears falling down her face.

Negan cups her cheek, his thumb wiping at her tears. He pulls her to him, holding her in his arms. "That was so, fucking, stupid Rachel. I thought i was gonna fucking lose you, i can't fucking lose you, not ever," he whispers.

She claws at his back, not wanting to let him go.

They head back towards the sanctuary, hand in hand. Lucille hanging at Negan's side.


	20. Chapter 20

Rachel walks down the corridor, freshly showered. She had just gotten back from a two day hunt, and was eager to see Negan.

"Hey, Simon," she smiles, meeting him in the corridor.

"Hey, Rach," he smiles, holding Negan's jacket in the crook of his arm.

"They finally got that clean then?" Rachel laughs.

"Yeah, took them long enough," he says.

"To be fair, it was saturated with walker crap. I thought they'd have to throw it away," she points out. "Gimme, i'll take it to him. He'll be over the moon."

"I'll take it to him. He's in a meeting, doesn't want to be disturbed," Simon says, a nervous look on his face.

"Meeting? What kind of meeting?" She asks, confused.

Simon stares at her. His eyes telling her what his mouth doesn't want to.

"Oh," she says, looking at the ground. Her stomach rolls, and her mouth goes dry.

Simon looks at her sympathetically. "Rachel-" he starts.

"Don't," she says.

"I'll go let him know you're here. He'll be pleased to see you, he's missed you," he says.

"Yeah, looks like it," she spits, still looking at the ground. "I gotta go," Rachel says, turning to leave.

"Hey, wait. Go where? You just got back," Simon frowns.

"Wayne said they got a load of meds at the outpost, need someone to go pick them up," Rachel says.

"Can't someone else do that?" Simon asks.

"Simon. To be honest, i could do with some air," she frowns, walking away.

* * *

Rachel sits on the motorbike, tears running down her face. _Fuck sake! Don't do this to yourself!_ She wipes at her tears with the back of her hand, and starts the bike, heading for the gates.

"Rachel!" She hears, just as the gates open. Negan runs towards her. "Where are you going?"

"Picking up some meds," she says, barely looking at him.

"You just got back. You were just gonna leave without fucking seeing me?" He frowns.

She stares at him, her face red. "I didn't think you'd mind, what with you being busy."

Negan tilts his head. "Rachel."

"What? It's none of my business what you get up to. You're not mine," she says.

"Rachel, don't be like that," Negan says.

"Like what?" She snaps.

Negan looks towards his men at the gate. "Give us a fucking minute," he orders.

His men leave, heading inside.

"I've barely touched my wive's since we got toget-" Negan starts.

"I don't, want to know, okay. It's none of my business what you do with your wive's. I'm just a mistress after all," Rachel frowns.

"Come on Rachel, you know you're more than that to me," Negan reasons.

"Do i? Negan, i can't do this anymore, okay. I'm done," she says.

"What do you mean you're done?" Negan frowns, his tone becoming serious.

"With us," she answers.

"Hey, you knew how it was, well before we started fucking!" He shouts.

"Yeah well, it was fun to begin with, but i'm bored of you now," she sneers, feeling sick as she says it.

"You don't mean that," Negan says, his eyes wide.

"I do," she lies.

"Get off that fucking motorbike, and get your ass inside!" Negan yells.

"Don't talk to me like that, i'm not a fucking dog!" Rachel snaps.

"No, you're one of my men, and i'm giving you a damn order!" He shouts, grabbing at her arm. "So do as your told, and get the fuck off that bike!"

Rachel shakes her arm away from him. "Fuck you! Why don't you go back inside, i'm sure your wive's are missing you!" She spits.

Negan stares at her, his eyes burning with anger. "Fine, go. I don't fucking care."

"Good, me neither," she replies, revving the engine, and driving out the gates. She gives him the finger, as she drives off.

"Fuck!" Negan yells.

Simon walks up behind him. "You gonna let her go off like that?" He asks.

"What the fuck am i supposed to do? She never fucking does as she's told!" Negan shouts.

"I thought that's what you liked about her?" Simon smiles.

Negan stares at him, his face softens into a smile. "Fuck, did you hear what she said?"

"She doesn't mean it. She's just upset, that's all," Simon assures him.

"Fuck, i hope so," Negan says, looking through the gate. "I'd go after her, but there's no fucking point, better to give her some space. I fucking hate that!" Negan frowns.

"She'll be back soon enough, Negan. How about we have a drink?" Simon suggests.

Negan nods, and heads inside.

* * *

Rachel speeds down the road, trying to clear her mind. She arrives at the outpost, her stomach still rolling, from her argument with Negan.

"Rachel? What are you doing out here?" Wayne asks.

"I was bored, thought i'd pick up those meds," she says, attempting to smile.

"Shit! And here's me thinking you'd come to see me," he laughs.

"Well that's a bonus," Rachel jokes. "You got any cigarettes?"

"Yeah, sure," he says, digging through his pocket.

"Thanks," she says, taking the cigarette from him.

"I thought you quit?" Wayne asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, well. It's been a stressful day," she says, lighting it up. Upon her first drag, she feels the sickly feeling in her stomach begin to dissipate.

"Yeah, just don't go telling Negan i gave you one, he'll go ape shit," Wayne smiles.

"I won't," she promises. "How's it going out here?" She asks.

"Good. We've had some problems with Hilltop though," he says.

"Really? What kind of problems?" Rachel frowns.

"Just some shit with their leader, guy's a real asshole. You met him?" Wayne asks.

Rachel shakes her head, too busy puffing on her cigarette to answer.

"Well that's lucky. You wouldn't want to," he laughs.

Rachel flicks her cigarette away. "Thanks for the cigarette. Do you know where the meds are?"

"Top floor, there's a sign on the door," Wayne answers.

"Okay, seeya," she smiles.

"Seeya," Wayne replies.

Rachel heads inside, crossing paths with another savior. "Hey, Bud," she smiles.

"Hey, Rachel," he says, walking outside.

* * *

Rachel rummages through the med storage, attempting to fit as much as she can into her backpack. There's more than she thought, and she regrets not bringing a car instead. She finds a pack of nicotine gum, and pockets it. Rachel rests her backpack on a desk, humming as she looks through a box of antibiotics.

The alarm goes off, startling her. She drops the bottles on the ground, running towards the window. She looks outside, expecting to see walkers, but nothing. Rachel hears gunfire from within the outpost. "Shit!" She says to herself, as she realises she hasn't brought her gun.

Rachel opens the door slowly, looking up the corridor. She sees a big guy in the hall. Pretty confident that he's not a savior, she shuts the door. "Fuck!" She says, leaning against the door. She has her bow with her, but knows it will be no match for the heat that guy was packing. Not up close, that's for sure. Rachel switches off the light, and moves the desk to the side of the door. She stands upon it, removing her knife from her belt. She waits, hoping to get a jump on him.

The door creaks open, slowly. Rachel wastes no time, as the big guy enters the room. She slashes at him with her knife. She surprises him, but he's quick, knocking it out of her hand. Rachel jumps on his back, wrapping her arms around his neck, in an attempt to choke him. But she's nowhere near strong enough.

He turns with his back to the wall, and slams himself, or rather her, into it, the light flickering on in the process.

Rachel holds tight, refusing to let go. She wraps her legs around him, tightening her hold.

He drops his gun, and slams into the wall once again, her legs loosen their grip, as pain shoots through her back. A different kind of sickly feeling fills her, as she struggles to catch her breath. He grabs the top of her arms, and in one quick movement, he flips her over his head, and slams her against the desk.

Rachel falls straight through it, cracking it in two. She opens her mouth, to curse, but nothing comes out, the wind knocked straight out of her.

The big guy grabs his gun, and points it at her, as she lays on the ground. Rachel stares at him, and he stares back. She sees the gun coming towards her face with force, then black...


	21. Chapter 21

The sun begins to rise over the sanctuary. It would be silent, if not for the walkers on the fence. The dead are extra vocal this morning.

An arrow shoots through the chest of a legless walker, chained to the fence. Dwight walks over, pulling it out. The left side of his face is covered in bandages, but he's in a much better state than he was a few days ago. He has clean clothes for a start, and a belly full of food. Now he was one of them, Dr. Carson had begun to treat his burns more thoroughly, and they didn't hurt as much.

He walked back to the steps, aiming his new crossbow at the dead, still trying to get used to the damn thing.

"What you doing?" Comes a voice from behind him.

He turns, as Simon walks towards him. "Little target practice," he says, showing him the crossbow.

"You came back with that right?" Simon asks.

Dwight nods, not really wanting to think about his expedition with Sherry. "Yeah, along with the bike. Primo's got that though."

"You prove yourself to Negan, and you'll get the bike back soon enough," Simon smiles.

Simon's radio begins to crackle. A voice comes through, but it's crackly and full of static. "These pieces of shit! We really need to find something better," he says to Dwight, as he unclips the radio from his belt. "This is Simon. Can you repeat that, over."

"It's Paula. There's been an attack at the outpost, over," says the voice over the radio.

Simon frowns. "An attack, what kind of attack? Over."

"Another group. They have Primo. We have two of their people, they want to make a trade. Everyone at the outpost is dead, over," she replies.

Simon freezes, not quite sure how to handle this. Then his eyes widen. "Wait, which outpost did you say? Over."

"Wayne's outpost. We're heading to the break point, over," she answers.

Simon's face turns a sickly grey. "Oh shit," he says, running back inside.

* * *

Negan snores, sleeping deeply on his sofa, a half empty bottle of whiskey, and an empty glass on the coffee table beside him. He's still fully dressed, minus his jacket, which he used as a makeshift blanket.

His bedroom doors burst open. Negan's leg twitches briefly, as he continues to snore.

"Negan," Simon says, attempting to wake him.

"The fuck?" Negan murmurs, his eyes still closed.

"Negan, wake up," Simon says, panicking, his breath heavy.

"What, what the fuck is it?" Negan frowns, his eyes only half open.

"There's been an attack!" Simon says.

Negan sits up. "An attack? What kind of attack?"

"Wayne's outpost. Another group attacked it. They have Primo. Paula has two of their people hostage, she's taking them to the safehouse," Simon pauses, his eyes gloomy. "Everyone at the outpost is dead."

"Fuck!" Negan roars, getting up from the sofa. He begins to pace his bedroom, rubbing at his temples. He stops pacing abruptly, a sickness washing over him. Negan turns to Simon. "Where's Rachel?"

Simon stares at him, clenching his jaw. He shakes his head.

"No," Negan almost whispers. "She can't...tell me she isn't," he chokes, biting back tears. "She fucking can't be!" He yells, grabbing the glass from the table, and smashing it against the wall. He turns away from Simon, wiping at the tears falling down his cheeks. He takes a deep breath. "She can't be, Simon." He begins, turning to him. "She's a fucking badass! I won't fucking have it, you hear me!"

"Yes, boss," Simon answers, unsure of what else to say.

"Good. Let's get our fucking asses over to the outpost! My baby needs me!"

* * *

The drive there is long, Negan's last words to Rachel playing over and over in his mind. _Fuck! Why did i have to say that!_ He scolds himself. "Can you not make this thing go fucking faster!" He scowls.

Simon steps on the gas. Unlike Negan, he feels no rush to get there. He would rather prolong the inevitable.

Simon's Radio begins to crackle. "We need back up, there's been a slaughter at the safehouse. The hostages are gone, over."

Negan grabs the radio from Simon's belt. "What the fuck! What the fuck is going on out there?" he fumes over the radio.

"Everyone at the safehouse is dead, someone set fire to them, over," the voice replies.

Negan slams the radio against the dashboard, rendering it useless. "Who the fuck are these people, Simon? Who the fuck do they think they are? They're gonna regret fucking with me! That's for damn sure!" He seethes.

They pull up at the outpost. Negan jumps out of the truck before Simon switches of the engine. He goes to run straight into the building, but Simon pulls at his arm.

"We should be careful, Negan. We don't know what's in there," he warns.

"My fucking baby is in there," he frowns, pointing Lucille towards the outpost. "If any of those pricks are still in there, then un-fucking-lucky for them," he snarls.

* * *

They walk along the corridor, their footfalls echoing through the building. Simon slowly opens one of the doors, his gun ready. "Jesus!" he gasps, as he sees two of his fellow saviors.

Negan walks over to the corpse on the bed. "Those fuckers, just came in here, and fucking killed these guys in their sleep!" he spits. "Who the fuck does that? This wasn't just a random attack. It was a fucking assassination! This was planned, Simon."

"You think they've been watching us?" Simon asks.

"Yeah. But obviously they weren't watching properly, otherwise they wouldn't have fucking messed with us," he scowls.

"You think this was Hilltop?" Simon wonders.

Negan thinks for a moment. "No," he shakes his head. "Whoever did this, it wasn't them. Maybe they had a fucking hand in it though. We'll find out, don't you fucking worry about that."

They head to the top floor, Negan's heart pounding in his chest, as he sees the bullet holes in the walls.

"Maybe she got out?" Simon says, clutching at straws.

Negan turns to him. "Maybe."

They arrive at the last door, Negan turns the handle, sweat building against his temples. As he opens the door, he breathes a sigh of relief, as it appears to be empty. He walks in, turning his head to the left. His heart sinks, as he sees Rachel on the floor, the left side of her face covered in blood. "Rachel," he whimpers, making his way to her.

"Oh, Jesus," Simon gasps.

Negan kneels beside her, running his hand over her face. She's warm. His eyes widen, as he begins to check her pulse. "She's fucking breathing!" A faint smile crosses his face. He checks her over for any potential wounds, then he looks at the right side of her face. "Someone clocked her, right in the fucking temple!" He says angrily. "We need to get her back to the sanctuary, get her to Dr. Carson!" He orders. "Grab Lucille for me," he says, as he tucks his arms underneath Rachel, carrying her bridal style. "Come on, baby. Don't you dare fucking leave me."


	22. Chapter 22

"She's got a concussion," Dr. Carson say.

"No shit! That's fucking obvious. Is she gonna be alright though?" Negan asks, frowning.

Dr. Carson continues looking her over. "There's no way to tell for sure. She's breathing, so that's always a good sign."

Negan huffs frustratedly. "What fucking use are you? You can't tell me if she's gonna be alright?"

"I'm sorry, Negan. All we can do for now, is keep an eye on her," he says.

Negan holds Rachel's hand. He looks at her lying there. She looks so tiny to him, so vulnerable. His last words to her keep playing over and over in his head. _Fuck! Please don't let those be my last words to her._

"How is she?" Simon asks, leaning against the door.

Negan turns to him, the whites of his eyes red. "Doctor doesn't know, what fucking use is he?"

Simon steps in, making his way to the other side of Rachel. "She looks so tiny."

Negan smiles, briefly. "I was just thinking that myself. Christ, to look at her, you wouldn't believe how we first met."

"I'll never forget it. I was in awe of her," Simon smiles.

"We both were. I still am. That's why it's so hard to..to see her like this," Negan stutters.

Simon nods. "Rachel's the cutest little badass i ever met. She's gonna be fine, Negan."

"She will won't she. I need to stop being such a fucking pussy," Negan jokes.

"I know this isn't the best time, but what do you want me to do about the attack?" Simon asks.

Negan looks up at him. "We've already got men out there looking for those, fuckers!" He spits. "I need you to lead the search, Simon. I can't leave her. Not until i know she's okay."

"Sure thing, Negan," Simon assures him.

"Right now, i just want to find them. You find them, then back off. I want some time to think things through, because if i act right now, i'll Lucille every last fucking one of them!" Negan growls.

"I'll get right on it," Simon nods, then heads out the door.

Negan sits in the chair beside her bed, keeping a tight grip on her hand. He strokes her forehead, his finger running through her hair. "I'm sorry, baby. I..i'm a huge asshole. Just..just wake up, okay," he leans forward, placing a kiss on her forehead. "Don't leave me, baby. I..i'm fucking crazy about you. So wake the fuck up. That's an order."

Negan sits slumped in the chair, his hand resting against hers. He snores lightly, twitching every so often. He dreams.

* * *

 _Negan sits at the side of a hospital bed. He's been sat there for hours? Days? Weeks? He's not so sure. He holds the hand of the woman beside him. She's not much more than skin and bones. Her body eaten away by the disease that is slowly killing her. "Don't leave me, baby. You can't leave me. What the fuck am i supposed to do without you?" He sobs, tears falling down his cheeks. Her grip on his hand tightens. "Lucille," he smiles. Her grip tightens harder, almost crushing the bones in his hand. "Lucille!" He cries, trying to pull his hand away from hers. He jumps out of his chair, and falls to the floor, as she finally loosens her grip. He stands slowly. He doesn't want to, but his body doesn't care what he wants. He looks down at her. Her face is covered with a bed sheet. He reaches his hand forward, slowly pulling the cover back from her face. It's just his Lucille, his poor Lucille. Her skin taut against her frame. She's gone. "I'm so sorry, Lucille," he sobs. Her body begins to rot, right in front of his eyes. "No," he whimpers, as her skin peels from her, turning her into a rotting corpse. Negan wants to cover his eyes, but his body won't allow it. He watches her fade to nothing but bones. Then he's sat on the chair, once again. Holding her hand, once again. "Don't leave me, baby. You can't leave me. What the fuck am i supposed to do without you?" He sobs once again. She grips his hand. She grips it tight, until he falls to the floor once again. Negan stands, moving his hands towards the covers, slowly pulling them down. Only this time, it's Rachel. "No, please. I'm sorry," he cries, shaking his head. He watches Rachel rot._

* * *

Rachel mumbles, her legs slowly moving beneath the sheets. Her eyes begin to flicker open, the light from the lamp making her wince. She feels a hand on hers, and turns her head to the left, the very motion, making the room spin. She moans, as dizziness hits her. She can just about make out Negan. She can make out about three Negan's to be honest. "Negan," she mutters, squeezing her hand against his slightly.

Negan twitches, then his eyes open. They widen upon seeing her awake. "Rachel. Holy shit! Rachel," he smiles, jumping out of his seat. He peppers her with kisses. "Oh, Rachel. I thought i'd fucking lost you."

"I don't feel so good," she mutters, looking straight through him. "I feel sick."

Negan nods his head. His eyes are wide, half excitement, half worry. He grabs a bucket from the floor, then adjusts her pillows, helping her to sit up slightly.

She vomits. Negan holds the bucket underneath her, whilst holding her hair away from her face. Her hands clench the bucket, her body shaking. Negan places her hair behind her ear, and rubs her back. She winces, then vomits again. Negan frowns. He carefully lifts the back of her vest, and sees the dark nasty bruises. He rolls it back down gently, clenching his jaw in an attempt to bite back tears. "Carson!" Negan shouts.

Dr. Carson enters the room, making his way to the other side of her bed. "How long has she been awake?"

"Not long. She said she felt sick," Negan says.

"That's perfectly normal. I'll check her over once she's finished," Carson assures him.

"I think i'm done," Rachel says, spitting in the bucket. "No, wait," she adds, dry heaving.

Dr. Carson hands her some tissues. She takes them, wiping at her mouth.

"I'm good for now," she nods, leaning back on the bed. She winces.

"How many fingers am i holding up?" Dr. Carson asks.

Rachel squints her eyes. "Two, but there's three of you, so six," she half laughs.

"Is that normal?" Negan frowns.

"She took a big hit to the head. It's hard to tell right now. Hopefully, the dizziness should dissipate," Dr. Carson says, then turns back to Rachel. "How are you feeling?"

"Dizzy. Like i'm drunk. My head hurts. But not as much as my back. It hurts to breathe," Rachel says.

"You have some bruised ribs. Unfortunately, i can't give you anything too strong, what with your head injury. You'll find it easier to take shallow breaths. But whenever you can, i'd advise trying to breathe as normally as possible. Try and take ten slow, deep breaths every hour," he says. He comes behind her, adjusting her pillows. "Sleeping upright will help."

Rachel nods, as Negan helps her adjust herself on the bed.

"Can you remember what happened to you?" Dr. Carson asks.

Rachel rests against the pillows. "I..i was. Shit, i can't think."

"That's okay, what's the last thing you remember?" Dr. Carson asks.

"I was, on a bike. And Negan was there," she says.

Negan tenses beside her, knowing full well that the last thing she can probably remember, is their argument.

Rachel turns her head to Negan. "Did we argue?"

Negan nods, looking down at the floor.

"I drove off. Shit! Where was i going? I can't think," she frowns.

"That's okay, don't worry about that for now, you just get some rest if you can," Dr. Carson says.

Rachel nods, her eyes already growing heavy.

"Is she okay sleeping?" Negan asks.

"As long as someone's watching over her, she'll be fine," he assures him.

* * *

Negan doesn't sleep after that. He keeps watch over her throughout the rest of the night. He smiles, as more and more of his men come to check on her. As the sun begins to rise, he sees Dwight, standing in the doorway.

"Dwighty boy, what's up?" Negan asks.

"I just wanted to check on her, make sure she was alright," he shrugs.

"Well come the fuck in then, don't just stand there," Negan chuckles lightly.

Dwight walks over, standing at the foot of the bed, his crossbow hanging off his shoulder.

"She gonna be alright?" Dwight asks.

"I think so. No thanks to those assholes. I swear, when i fucking find them, they're gonna wish they'd never fucking messed with us!" Negan scowls. He stares at Dwight's crossbow. "What are the chances of it being the same group as that guy you came across?"

Dwight shrugs. "I don't know. He didn't say where he was from. He definitely had a group though."

"What was his name?" Negan asks.

"Daryl," Dwight says.

Negan grimaces. "Daryl. I fucking hate that name!"

Dwight just stares at him, then glances at the floor. "Well, i'll get going. Said i'd help with the search."

"Yeah, seeya," Negan says, still watching over Rachel.

Rachel shifts on the bed, wincing. She opens her eyes, turning her head towards Negan.

"Hey, baby. How you feeling?" He smiles.

"Like shit," she smiles. "At least i can only see one of you now though."

"Well that's fucking awesome," he beams.

"I don't know. I kind of liked the idea of three of you," Rachel jokes.

"You dirty, girl," Negan grins.

Rachel smiles at him, then glances down at his hand. "I'm sorry."

Negan stares at her, confused. "Sorry? What the hell are you sorry for?"

"For driving off like that. You were right. I knew how things were when i met you, i-"

"Hey," Negan says, cutting her off. "You, have nothing, to be sorry for. I ask so much of you, and all you get in return is me. It's not much of a fucking trade when i think about it," he looks down at the floor. "You could do so much better."

Rachel squeezes his hand. "I probably could," she laughs. "But you're what i want," Rachel assures him.

Negan looks up at her. He leans over her, kissing her softly. "I don't know what i would've done if i'd lost you," he says, his lips ghosting over hers.

Rachel runs a hand through his hair. "Can't get rid of me that easily."

"I didn't mean what i said. When you left. I do care. I was just, angry," he whispers.

Rachel smiles. "So, you care about me. That's sweet."

Negan smiles against her mouth. He kisses her, then sits back in his chair, keeping hold of her hand. "So you remember everything?"

"I think so," she says.

"We don't have to talk about it," he says.

"What happened, Negan? Is everyone at the outpost gone?"

He stares at her, and nods. "It wasn't just the outpost. Paula captured two of their people. She took them to a safe house. Paula and her group didn't make it out of there alive."

"Jesus!" She winces.

"Hey, you need to relax, baby," he says. He walks over to a fridge in the corner, taking out an ice pack. Negan wraps a cloth around it, and places it against her back. "This should help."

"Do we know who these guys are?" She asks.

"I've got all the men i can on it. We'll find them, baby. I fucking promise you," he says.

"I remember what happened. At the outpost," Rachel says.

"You don't have to talk about it, baby," Negan frowns.

"No, i want to. I, i feel guilty," she says, her eyes welling up.

"Hey. Why the fuck would you feel guilty?" Negan frowns.

"I couldn't do anything. They're all dead, and i couldn't do a thing about it!" Rachel sobs, wincing as she does.

"You have no reason to feel guilty. There was nothing you could do. So cut that shit out, okay?"

Rachel nods, wiping at her eyes. "I saw one of them. I'd heard gunfire, and i went straight to the window, thinking it was walkers. I panicked when i didn't see any, and, i didn't even have my gun. I looked out in the hall, that's when i saw one of them. Big guy, ginger hair. Moustache like it was straight out of the seventies or something," she smiles a little. "I tried to get the better of him. But he was too big. I don't understand though?" She frowns.

"What's that, baby?" Negan asks.

"Why didn't he kill me? I mean, they killed everyone else at the outpost. So why didn't he shoot me?" She wonders.

Negan thinks on it for a second. "I don't know, sweetheart. Maybe they had to leave in a hurry?"

"Maybe," she frowns.

"You just focus on getting some rest. I'm gonna need you at your full strength for when we find those fuckers," Negan says.

Rachel nods. She's had so much sleep, but she still feels like she could sleep for a week. Her eyes close once again, as she drifts off to sleep.

Negan watches her, smiling. "Night, baby."


	23. Chapter 23

"You can't keep me here forever, Negan," Rachel sulks.

"Course i fucking can," Negan smiles.

"Negan, i'm being serious," she smiles.

"So am i, you need time to heal, baby," he says, giving his best puppy dog eyes.

Rachel turns her face away. "Would you stop that, it's not going to work."

Negan crawls towards her on the bed. "It always fucking works," he grins. "I'm fucking adorable, right?"

Rachel tries her best not to laugh, and fails. "You're such a dick," she smiles, kissing his nose. "And sod off with those dimples!"

"What? These?" He smiles, leaning over her.

"Yes, those," she laughs. Rachel runs her hand through the back of his hair. "It's been almost five weeks. I feel fine. I should be out there."

"Just, give me one more week," he says.

"Negan-" she starts.

"I almost lost you, Rachel. Please," he pleads.

Her face softens. "How the hell am i supposed to say no to that face?"

Negan smiles, stroking her hair. "I got an idea for something we could do."

Rachel raises an eyebrow. "If it's butt stuff again, then no."

Negan chuckles. "No, it isn't. But i love how you automatically think that, it's so...me."

"Ha, ha. So what is it?" Rachel smiles.

Negan walks to the other side of the room, and comes back with a box in his hands. "Scrabble," he smiles.

"Scrabble? That has got to be the most mundane thing, to ever come out of your mouth," she frowns.

"Come on, i'm fucking trying here. You worried i'm gonna kick your ass or something?" Negan grins.

"Please, i'm bloody awesome at scrabble," Rachel smiles, grabbing the game from him.

* * *

"Negan, you can't have, butt plug," Rachel frowns.

"Why the fuck not?" He sulks.

"Because for one, it isn't spelt right. And two...well, there is no two," she answers.

"It is spelt right, see?" He says, placing the letters on the board.

"You can't put it there," she says.

"Why not?" He frowns.

"Because then you have a whole bunch of two letter words, that aren't words!" She stresses.

Negan rolls his eyes. "What the fuck ever. This game is boring."

"It was your idea to play it," Rachel smiles. "And, you only think it's boring because you're losing."

Negan stares at her, biting on his bottom lip. "Let's do something else instead."

"Negan," she sighs, rubbing her temples.

"Hey, are you okay? Is your head hurting?" Negan worries, making his way over to her.

"Negan, my head is fine. It has been for two weeks. My ribs are fine. I'm a fast healer. I just..i feel like i'm suffocating. I need to get out of here," Rachel says softly.

Negan strokes the side of her face. "You, are needed right here. Right here, is where i want you to fucking be, and that's a damn order," he says, kissing her cheek.

"Well, if i'm gonna be stuck here, then you can at least make it worth my while," Rachel smiles, laying back on her elbows.

"Hmm, i can do that," he licks his lips, crawling over her.

Rachel wraps her legs around his waist, running her hands through the back of his hair. She runs kisses over his jawline, his beard prickling her lips.

"Fuck, baby!" He groans, his cock throbbing against her stomach. Negan grabs her wrists, pinning them to the bed. He nips and sucks on her neck.

"Negan," Rachel moans, writhing beneath him.

There's an impatient knock at the door. Negan turns his head. "Fuck!"

"You should get that," Rachel smiles.

Negan ghosts his lips over hers. "This isn't over," he smiles. He gets up from the bed, and answers the door. "Dwight, what the fuck is it?"

"Janet needs you to go over the inventory."

"Fuck sake! Isn't that her job? I mean, what is the fucking point of me having all these men, if they need me to wipe their fucking asses every five minutes?" Negan frowns.

Dwight looks down at the floor, shifting his feet.

Negan strokes his beard. "Alright, but it better not take long. How are we getting on with the search?"

"We think we're getting close. John found some tracks just now, he's just having a little trouble following them," Dwight says.

Rachel sits up on the bed, turning her attention to their conversation.

"Isn't he a fucking tracker? Can't anyone do anything right? Jesus!" Negan frowns.

"I'm gonna go out there now, see if i can help," Dwight says.

"Alright, you do that. Tell Janet i'll be down in five," Negan orders.

Dwight nods, then walks off.

Negan turns to Rachel. "Don't even fucking think about it."

Rachel frowns. "Think about what?"

"I know you were listening just now, and i'll bet your ears pricked up at the sound of the word tracker," Negan says.

"Come on, Negan. If i could just-," Rachel starts.

"No," Negan says sternly. "I told you to give me a week, so you're giving me a damn week, okay?"

Rachel breathes deeply. "Okay."

He moves closer to her. "I mean it, Rachel. You fucking promise me, promise me you won't go out there."

"I promise," Rachel sulks.

He walks over to her, and place his fingers under her chin. "Good, girl," he smiles, kissing her softly. "Now, when i get back, you better fucking be here."

"Alright, i'll walk with you," she says.

"Why?" He frowns.

"Because i'm hungry, and i want to go get something to eat. Is that alright?" She scowls.

Negan grins. "Come on."

* * *

Rachel leaves Negan to go through supplies, and heads towards the main floor. She walks back upstairs, grabbing her bow and arrow from her room, then heads outside. She sees a truck near the gate. "Dwight!" She shouts, running up to the truck.

Dwight sticks his head out of the window. "What's up?"

"I'm coming with you," she says, getting in the passenger seat.

"Hey, wait! Is Negan alright with this," Dwight asks.

"Yeah, he's fine."

"Well maybe i should go ask him first," Dwight worries.

"Come on, you're wasting time," Rachel rolls her eyes.

Dwight nods, and drives out the gate.

* * *

They pull up at the side of the road. Simon is there to greet them.

"Rachel?" Simon frowns, confused.

"Yeah, it's me," she smiles.

"What are you doing out here?" Simon asks.

"You said you found some tracks, so i'm here to track," Rachel says.

"Does Negan know you're out here?" Simon raises an eyebrow.

"Yes. Anyway, show me what you've got," Rachel says, changing the subject.

John makes his way over to her. "There's a few things really. This here though," he points at an oil spill in the road.

"That not one of ours?" Rachel asks.

John shakes his head. "Nope, i checked. None of our men have been through this road in the past two weeks, and this only looks a couple of days old, at a guess."

Rachel nods. "It was going in that direction," she points ahead.

"Yep, we was gonna head that way now, see what we could find," he says.

"We should keep off the road, maybe go through the woods," Rachel suggests. "We want to take them by surprise, if it is them."

"I agree. Come on guys, we're leaving our cars here," John says.

Rachel, Simon, John and Dwight, walk through the woods, keeping the road within there sight.

"What's that?" Rachel whispers, pointing to a sign in the road.

Dwight walks closer to it. "Alexandria," he says.

"Alexandria? You ever heard of that?" Rachel asks them.

"No," Simon says. "Let's keep going."

They hear a rustling in the trees, a single walker.

"I've got it," Rachel smiles. She aims her bow at the walker, and draws it. To her surprise, and annoyance, her arm begins to shake. She releases, getting it straight in the head.

"You okay?" Simon frowns.

"Yeah," she says, massaging her arm. "It's being cooped up for five weeks. I've not had a chance to work my arms."

Simon nods, then they continue on.

After another thirty minutes, Simon's radio begins to crackle. "Simon, you there? Over."

Rachel tenses a little at the sound of Negan's voice.

"I'm here, what is it? Over," Simon asks.

"Please don't fucking tell me that Rachel's out there, over," Negan says.

Dwight stares at her. "I thought you said he knew you was out here?"

"I thought he did," she shrugs her shoulders.

"Yes, she's out here, over," Simon answers.

"Fuck! Fucking! Fu-" Rachel grabs the radio from Simon, and switches it off.

"Rachel," Simon says, tilting his head slightly.

"Look, we don't have time for this. We're close, i can feel it. I'll deal with Negan when i get back, but right now, this is all that matters. And if Negan can't see that, well, it's just tough shit! So come on," she frowns, continuing on.

* * *

Rachel and John slow their footsteps.

"You hear that?" John asks.

"Yeah," Rachel says.

They see a huge wall in the distance.

"Holy shit!" Simon whispers. "You think it's them?"

"I don't know, but it's definitely some sort of community," Rachel says. "Woah, you see that," Rachel points at a guy stood up on a platform.

"Is that a priest?" Dwight frowns.

"Looks like it. Look at the heat he's packing though, not very godly is it," she smiles.

"We're gonna have to set up some lookouts," Simon says. "Even if these aren't the people we're looking for, just to be on the safe side."

"Hey wait, he's stepping down," Dwight points towards the priest.

Rachel watches him disappear. Then her eyes widen, as she watches a big guy step up on the platform. "That's him," she says, her mouth dry.

Simon turns to her. "Are you sure?"

Rachel nods. "He's pretty distinctive don't you think?"

Simon nods. "Can't argue with that. We fucking got em!" He smiles.


	24. Chapter 24

Rachel drives through the gates of the sanctuary with Dwight. Simon and John had stayed behind, radioing for more of Negan's men to keep watch over Alexandria. Rachel catches sight of Negan standing at the entrance, and he looks pissed. Rachel pulls up the truck, and steps out, making her way towards him.

"Look, before you start, i nee-," she begins, but Negan isn't interested in what she has to say. He grabs her, and throws her over his shoulder. "Negan! Put me down!" Rachel yells, as he turns and heads inside.

Luckily for her, he bypasses the main floor. But they still come across his men in the halls.

"Negan! Put me down! Right now!" She shouts, kicking her legs at him. Negan just shuffles her further onto his shoulder, tightening his grip on her.

They walk towards his room, the parlour outside, filled with his wives. He kicks his bedroom door open, makes his way towards the bed, and throws her down. Rachel jumps straight up, as Negan walks back to the bedroom door, closing it.

"What the hell was that?" Rachel yells.

Negan turns to her, his face red. "I told you not to go out!"

"You just embarrassed me in front of everyone!" Rachel fumes.

"Good! Maybe you'll think fucking twice about disobeying my orders in future!" Negan shouts.

Rachel pulls her arm back, slapping him straight across his cheek, tears running down her face. "You, ever, do that again, and i'll leave," she fumes, choking back tears. Rachel walks straight past him, slamming the door on her way out.

Negan turns towards the door, rubbing at his cheek. "Fuck!" He scolds himself, sitting down on the bed, holding his head in his hands.

* * *

Rachel walks through the parlour, purposely not making eye contact with his wives.

"You okay?" Sherry asks.

"Fuck off, Sherry," Rachel says, not even turning to look at her.

Rachel opens her bedroom door, slamming it behind her. She grabs the makeshift vase by her bed, and throws it against the wall. Her heart pounds in her chest, and her hands shake furiously. Rachel grabs her books from the shelf, and throws them at the door, baring her teeth like a wild animal. She rips the heart locket from around her neck, tossing it to the other side of the room. She can hear voices outside her door, but couldn't care less, as she continues to throw whatever is at hand.

Her door swings open, and Negan comes up behind her, pulling her against him.

She shakes his arms off her, pushing at his chest. "Go away!"

Negan pulls her towards him, as she continues her attempts to push him away. "Rachel, i'm sorry," he frowns.

"No you're not!" She yells, pushing uselessly at his chest.

Negan keeps his arms wrapped around her, refusing to let go. "Look at me," he says softly.

"No!" Rachel snaps, turning her face away from him.

"Would you just, fucking look at me," he reasons.

"No, i won't. You just embarrassed me in front of everyone! Like i was nothing more than some stupid girl!" Rachel shouts, choking back tears once again.

"I know, and i'm fucking sorry, okay. I just..," Negan looks down at the ground, as Rachel finally looks at him. "I can't lose you. I know i say it all the fucking time, but, i fucking mean it. Have you, any, fucking, idea, what it was like walking into that building. I kept telling Simon that we'd find you safe and fucking sound. But i didn't know that. How the fuck could i? When i first saw you, laid down on the ground the way you were, i thought you were gone," Negan looks down at his feet, a tear falling down his cheek.

Rachel wipes at it with her thumb. She wraps her hand round the back of his neck, pulling his face towards hers, her lips connecting with his.

Negan loosens his arms, running a hand through her hair. He kisses her fiercely, his hands running over her body, his breath heavy.

Rachel tugs at his jacket, moaning against his mouth. She grabs Negans shirt, pulling it over his head.

They make their way to her bed, tearing at each others clothes, kicking off their boots. Rachel falls back on the bed, clawing at Negan's shoulders, taking him with her. Negan nips at her neck, his hands eagerly opening the buttons on her skirt. Rachel tugs at his pants, as Negan shuffles them down his legs, kicking them away.

Negan wastes no time, sliding himself inside her, groaning against her mouth. Rachel rolls her hips, her head tilting back as Negan sucks on her neck. He rocks his hips against hers, staying deep inside her, one hand curled around her neck, the other grasping her thigh.

Rachel arches her back, as her legs begin to tremble. She pulls at the back of his hair, running kisses over his neck, shoving her hips up to meet his.

Negan moans as his skin breaks out in gooseflesh, his fingers digging into her thigh. His hips continue their slow, but deep rhythm, Rachel's kisses on his neck sending shivers through his entire body. "Rachel," Negan groans, running his fingers through her hair.

Rachel opens her eyes. Negan's face looks pained, which she knows by now, means he's struggling to hold himself back. She strokes his cheek with her thumb. "Don't hold back," Rachel whispers.

Negan opens his eyes, staring down at her. His fingers entangled in her hair, he closes his eyes, his nose resting against hers. He rolls his hips faster, panting as she moans beneath him. Negan watches her, as he slams deep inside her. Her brows are furrowed, and he knows she's close. "Come for me, baby," Negan growls.

Rachel claws at the back of his neck, as the heat of her orgasm runs through her body. Her legs twitching as she pulsates against him. "Negan," she moans.

Negan thrusts into her one final time, as he releases himself inside her. "Oh, fuck! Rachel!" He groans.

* * *

Rachel lies in the crook of Negan's arm, lazily stroking his chest.

"I really am fucking sorry," Negan assures her, running his fingers up and down her arm.

"Yeah, course you are," Rachel smiles.

"Hey, i fucking am. I don't apologise unless i fucking mean it," Negan insists.

"Well, either way, you've got what you want. You embarrassed the shit out of me. So i'm not leaving this room for the next week, at least," Rachel says.

"Come on, it wasn't that bad," Negan smiles.

"Well, we'll just see about that, won't we," she smiles.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Negan frowns.

Rachel lifts her head to face him, resting her hands against his chest. "Nobody embarrasses me like that and gets away with it. I'll get you back, when you least expect it," Rachel teases.

"You can't do that. I said i was fucking sorry," he frowns.

"Watch me," Rachel smiles.

"You know what? I don't fucking embarrass easily, so do your worst," Negan smiles.

Rachel kisses his nose, then lies back down. "You heard about Alexandria, right?"

"Yes, i have. And i'm grateful, Rachel. Really and fucking truly. But i'd much rather know that you're safe, than have you running around out there," Negan says.

"But that's just it, Negan. I'm not safe here."

Negan turns on his side to face her. "This is the safest place in the fucking world, what the hell are you talking about?"

"Nowhere's safe, nowhere. You keeping me here, is making me weak. I took a walker out with my bow, and i struggled. I struggled, because all i've been doing, is sitting on my backside, reading bloody books for the past few weeks," Rachel says.

"That's bullshit. You've been recovering," Negan frowns.

"Out there, there's no time for recovery. The sanctuary is safe for now. But this place could turn to shit in a heartbeat. If you care about me, then you'll want me out there. I need to be able to take care of myself. And.. that is why you liked me in the first place," Rachel reasons.

"I know, it's just.. hard," he says.

"Already?" Rachel teases.

"Not that, but it fucking will be in a few minutes," Negan smiles, biting his lip.

Rachel giggles, as Negan wraps his arm around her waist. "What are you going to do?"

"Well, i'm thinking, i might fucking let you ride the shit out of my cock," Negan smirks.

"I'm not talking about your dick, Negan. I meant, what are you going to do about Alexandria?"

Negan takes a deep breath. "I'm not sure yet. We're gonna watch them for a while, figure out their numbers first."

"And then?" Rachel asks.

"And then, they're gonna wish they'd never fucked with us," Negan says coldly.

"You're not going to take them all out, are you?" Rachel asks.

Negan stares at her, bemused. "You know, you're the weirdest person i've ever fucking met. You saw first hand what those assholes did, and yet, you're worried for them, aren't you?"

"I wouldn't go that far. They deserve to suffer some sort of loss, but that doesn't mean all of them deserve to die. I still think the whole thing's fishy," Rachel says.

"You still think Hilltop was involved?" Negan asks.

"It wasn't a random attack, Negan. They came through our group, with a clear intention in mind, to wipe us all out."

"They could've been watching us?" Negan reasons.

"They could have been, but i don't think so," Rachel says.

"Either way, i can't wait to smash that ginger's dome in."

"Negan, if it wasn't for him, i'd have been killed. So technically, he saved my life."

Negan stares at her. "That stupid pornstached fuck, almost killed you. I'm gonna knock that stupid fucking moustache straight back into the fucking seventies, where it belongs!"

"I guess i can't stop you. Just, try and restrain yourself. I'm assuming you're going to want to work with these people at some point, and it's going to be a whole lot easier, if you don't kill half of their people," Rachel points out.

"Alright. We'll watch them, and if they have something to offer us, then maybe i'll just take the one," Negan says.

"Good," Rachel smiles, rolling him onto his back. "Now, what was it you were saying earlier?" She purrs seductively.


	25. Chapter 25

"Fuck, fucking, fuckers!"

Rachel stops browsing the books in Negan's room, and heads to the parlour.

"What's wrong?" She asks, making her way over to him.

Negan rubs at his temples with one hand, holding a radio in his other. "We just lost more men, damn it!" He yells, his eyes ablaze with anger.

Rachel places her hands on his shoulders. "Come on, let's get you a drink," she says, leading him to the bedroom.

Negan drops down on the sofa, as Rachel grabs two glasses and a bottle of whiskey from the cabinet. She sits beside him, and offers him a glass.

"Thanks," he says, taking the glass from her. He swirls the glass in his hand, before taking a long drink of it.

"What happened?" Rachel asks, taking a sip from her glass.

"You know Dwight radioed this morning, right?" Negan asks, his eyes not leaving his glass.

"Yeah, he saw some of them leaving Alexandria, said it was the perfect opportunity to..," Rachel struggles to finish the rest.

Negan turns to her and smiles thoughtfully. He runs his hand through her hair, then continues looking at his glass. "To do what needed to be done. Take one of them out, and start from there. Apparently though, Dwight got a woman with his arrows, right through the fucking eye, can you believe that?"

"A woman?" Rachel's face drops.

"He swears he wasn't aiming for her, and i can believe it, he still hasn't gotten the hang of using that damn crossbow. He won't get to either, they took it from him. Dwight had one of their men hostage, and this guy, takes a fucking chunk out of Dwight's dick!" Negan smiles a little.

"Seriously?" Rachel asks, eyes wide.

"Well, i'm not sure that he took a chunk out of it. But he fucking clamped down on it pretty fucking hard, apparently. And then, that fucking ginger turned up! Fuck!" Negan clenches his fist, and takes another sip of whiskey. "There was a gunfight, and our men had to retreat. Not before we fucking lost some though."

"What are you going to do?" Rachel asks.

"We tried the easy way. Now, they're gonna have to learn the hard way. Next time they go out, they're screwed. I'm setting up men as we speak, on every damn road out of there. I'm gonna lead them, right where i want them. And then.. well, you know the rest," Negan says.

"You think they'll leave? After an attack?" Rachel frowns.

"I most certainly fucking do. Those motherfuckers are way too big for their boots. They think they own this fucking world. I'm gonna teach them otherwise," he smiles.

"Dwight said there are children there," Rachel says.

"Come on, Rachel. I'm not gonna hurt any kids, what the fuck do you take me for?"

"I didn't mean it like that, you know i didn't. I know they deserve to lose people, especially after everything they've done to us. Doesn't mean i have to like it though," she points out.

"I know, baby," Negan sits forward, resting his hand on her knee. "But, it has to be done. You know that. We're gonna wait. Hopefully, we'll be able to capture a good sized group of them. I want to draw their leader out. Dwight's seen him, and he'll radio through the moment he sees that fucker leave. That's when we make our move."

Rachel sips her whiskey. "What's his name? Their leader?"

"I don't know. Probably a good idea to find out before shit goes down, don't wanna look fucking stupid when i turn up there," Negan chuckles.

"How do you even know he's the leader then?"

"Come on, Rachel. You telling me you can't spot a leader a mile off?" Negan asks.

Rachel thinks back to the first time she met Negan, and the governor, and Rick. "Alright, i see your point," she smiles.

"My men have been watching them from a distance, long enough to know for sure," he assures her. He downs the rest of his drink, and holds his glass out.

Rachel tops it up for him. She takes her time with her own drink, the memory of the last time she got drunk, still fresh in her mind. "You hungry?"

"No, not really," Negan says, sipping his drink.

"Have you eaten today?" Rachel frowns.

"No, but like i said, i'm not fucking hungry," Negan says sarcastically.

"You shouldn't be drinking on an empty stomach, i'm going to go and get you something," Rachel stands up, placing her glass on the table.

"Did you not just hear me? Am i talking in fucking code or some shit?" Negan raises an eyebrow questioningly.

"You can't very well be a big badass leader, if you're bloody pants are falling down every five seconds. There's nothing to you as it is, you can't afford to miss a meal. So, i'm going to go and get you something, and you're going to do as you're told for a change, and eat what i put in front of you," Rachel orders, trying not to smile.

Negan's eyes go dark with lust. "Fuck! How about you put that fucking pussy in front of me. I'll eat that, all, fucking, day," Negan licks his lips.

"Maybe later," Rachel smiles. She takes the bottle from the table. "No more of this, you need to stay focused, okay."

"As you fucking wish, baby," Negan smiles.

* * *

The main floor is eerily empty, what with Negan's men out on the roads. Rachel makes her way to the kitchens, grabbing a tray and two bowls. She ladels stew into each, and grabs four small rolls of bread. Rachel opens the refrigerator. "Dan. These cakes aren't promised to anyone are they?" She shouts.

"No, they're anyone's. Well, anyone who earns them, that is," he replies.

"Okay, i'm gonna take three," Rachel says, grabbing them and placing them on her tray.

Rachel walks through the main floor, resting the tray down on a table. She takes a roll of bread, and one of the cakes. "Julia," she whispers.

A heavily pregnant woman looks up at her from her bed.

Rachel holds out the cake and bread.

"I can't, i haven't earned it," Julia says, shaking her head.

"No, i earned it, okay. I know what it's like to get chocolate cra.." Rachel stops herself. "Look, just take it. It's not like i'm offering you my kidney," Rachel smiles.

Julia takes them from her. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Rachel smiles, picking up the tray and heading up the steps.

* * *

Rachel sets the tray down on the coffee table.

Negan's face lights up at the sight of chocolate cake. He reaches out to grab it, and Rachel slaps his hand. "Ow! What the fuck?" Negan frowns.

"Stew first," Rachel says firmly.

"Well you're no fun," Negan pouts.

Rachel sits beside him, resting the bowl on her lap. Negan does the same, mirroring her.

"You know, you're starting to remind me of my mother," Negan says through a mouthful of bread.

Rachel turns to him, raising an eyebrow. "Am i to take that as an insult, or a compliment?"

Negan smiles. "My mother was fucking awesome! It's a compliment, sweetheart. Although, she knew how to put me in my damn place. Fuck if i'd ever cross her."

Rachel laughs lightly.

"What?" Negan asks, turning to her.

"Nothing.. it's just.. you, having a mother. I always imagined you were hatched or something," Rachel jokes.

Negan throws her a hurt look. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"Did i upset you just now? Would you like a hug?" Rachel teases.

"Shut the fuck up," Negan smirks.

"You never talked about.. before, i'm just surprised, that's all," Rachel says.

Negan continues eating his stew. "Well, i'm like you, don't see the point in looking backwards."

"So were you a mummy's boy?" Rachel smiles.

Negan turns to her, a grin on his face. "Yes, i was actually. I ain't ashamed to say it. My father fucked off the second i was born, so she raised me on her own. Just me and her."

"You never met him?" Rachel asks.

"Nope. And i never fucking wanted to either. In fact, that fucking asshole is lucky we never crossed paths, because it wouldn't have ended well," Negan says coldly.

Rachel stares at him, her heart practically melting. "Sounds like you were better off without him. And your mum sounds like she was awesome. You're lucky to have had her."

Negan turns to Rachel, watching her eat. "Since we're getting all fucking nostalgic, why don't you share?"

"Really?" Rachel frowns, chewing on a piece of meat.

"Really." Negan smiles. "Come on, what were your family like?"

Rachel sighs. "They.. weren't very nice. In fact, they were awful."

"They, didn't hurt you, did they?" He asks, his face dropping.

"Sometimes. But, i got taken away from them when i was twelve. And i turned out okay, so don't go feeling sorry for me," she insists.

Negan stares at her thoughtfully. "The thought never crossed my mind."

"Good. Now eat your food," she smiles.

* * *

"Fuck! That was good," Negan lays back on the sofa, rubbing his stomach contently. He watches Rachel grab the tray from the table. "What are you doing?"

"Taking this back to the kitchen."

"Fuck that. I'll get some fucker else to do it later. You come sit here with me," he smiles, holding out his hand.

Rachel takes his hand, and he pulls her down beside him, draping his arm over her shoulders. She rests her head against his chest, wrapping her arm around his waist.

"That, was the best thing i've ever fucking eaten!" Negan smiles.

"I thought you said i was the best thing you'd ever eaten?" Rachel teases.

"Fuck! You really are a dirty girl, aren't you," he smirks. Negan places his hand under her chin, tilting her face up to his. He kisses her softly. "You're right though. You are, the best, fucking, thing, i've ever tasted!" Negan runs his hand through her hair, his tongue colliding with hers. He pulls her onto his lap, running his hands over her thighs.

"Take me to bed," Rachel moans against his mouth.

Negan smirks. He cups his hands over her ass, and carries her over to the bed.

* * *

Negan and Rachel sleep soundly. The sun had long since risen over the sanctuary, and it was once again, eerily quite.

Negan snores lightly. That is, until a knock awakes him.

"The fuck?" He mumbles, his head leaving his pillow momentarily.

The knock comes once again, more urgent this time.

"Fuck sake! Hang on a damn minute!" Negan shouts.

Rachel stirs beside him. "Who is it?"

"Fuck knows," Negan frowns, getting out of bed. He pulls on a pair of boxers, and looks around for his pants. "You seen my pants?"

Rachel points to the floor on her side of the bed. "There."

Negan quickly pulls them on, and answers the door. "What is it?"

"We've got them," John says.

Negan's eyes widen. "You're shitting me?"

"No, sir. We captured four of their people, and, their leader just left with a group of six," John confirms.

Negan nods, grinning from ear to ear. "Make sure everyone's where they're supposed to be. I'll be down in about twenty minutes."

"Yes, boss." John says, heading off.

"What did he want?" Rachel asks, still half asleep.

"It's happening, today," he says, sitting on the bed beside her.

"Their leader left Alexandria?"

"Yep. Apparently, he left with six other people. And, we've already captured another four," he smiles.

"You're going to stick with the plan, right? Just one?" Rachel asks.

"Yes, i will. That's if they don't do anything stupid. Fuck! I hope that ginger fuck's there!" Negan stares off into the distance, his eyes dark. He turns to her, running his hand through her hair. "Do you want to be there?"

Rachel stares at him. "No," she shakes her head. "Unless you need me there?"

Negan smiles. "I won't make you go. I know how you feel about it. I'm not sure how long this is going to take though. I might not be back till tomorrow."

"Just, be careful. These guys keep surprising us," Rachel strokes his cheek. "Make sure you come back."

"Don't you worry about me, baby. I'll be back before you fucking know it. And, i'll finally have those sorry pricks in line," Negan smiles, kissing her forehead.


	26. Chapter 26

"They should have been back by now," Rachel frowns, playing absently with the locket around her neck.

She'd been sat on the steps outside the sanctuary for the last hour, keeping an eye out for Negan.

"I'm sure everything's fine," Gareth says.

"Then why hasn't he been on the radio?" She frets, shifting uncomfortably on the step.

Gareth opens his mouth, not quite sure what to say. But the sound of engines in the distance, is answer enough.

"It's them," Rachel smiles, getting to her feet. She watches the trucks drive through the gate, and breathes a sigh of relief, as she sees Negan in the passenger seat. Rachel walks over to him as he steps out, wrapping her arms around his neck. "I was worried about you," she says against his chest.

"Makes a fucking change, you worrying about me," Negan smiles, running his hand through her hair.

Rachel looks up at him. "Did it go the way it was supposed to?"

"Pretty fucking much. They thought they could outsmart us, and that didn't work out too well for them," Negan smiles. "I think i got them onboard."

"Don't be stupid! You're surrounded, you try anything and you won't make it out of there alive!" Dwight yells.

Rachel turns her head. "What's going on?"

"Some asshole from Alexandria. He'll make a good soldier though, once we've worn him down," Negan grins.

Rachel looks over at Dwight, grabbing someone from the back of a van. "Oh my god," she barely whispers, her throat suddenly dry. Rachel sways on her feet, her heart pounding in her chest. "Daryl?" She mouths, barely audible.

But Negan hears her, and what's more, he sees the look on her face.

"Daryl!" Rachel shouts. Her legs suddenly regaining the ability to move, as she attempts to make her way to him.

Daryl glances over at her. "Rachel?" He mouths.

He's a mess. His face is pale, and he's bleeding from his shoulder.

"Daryl," she repeats, her eyes brimming with tears, as she makes her way towards him. Rachel feels a hand on her arm, pulling her back.

Negan pulls her towards him. "That's Daryl? As in, the Daryl from your old group?" Negan frowns.

"Yes! What are you doing? What's he doing here? I got to go talk to him," Rachel stresses, trying to shake Negan's hand from her.

"I don't fucking think so," Negan says coldly. "Take him to the cells!" Negan orders.

"Negan! Let go of me!" Rachel yells, as she watches them take Daryl away.

Negan wraps his hands around her waist, refusing to let her go.

"Let me go!" Rachel shouts.

"Rachel! Would you fucking stop it!" Negan frowns, as he tries to keep hold of her.

"Let me go then!" She kicks her legs out.

"I'll let you go, if you promise not to go running after him! He's not going anywhere!" Negan shouts.

Rachel stops squirming, and Negan loosens his grip on her. She turns to him. "What the hell is this?" She demands, as tears fall down her cheeks.

"I'm not doing this here!" Negan moves in closer. "Not in front of my men," he lowers his voice. "Let's take this inside."

"But Daryl-," Rachel starts.

"Like i said. He's not fucking going anywhere. We've talked about this before, Rachel. You can't act like this in front of my men," Negan frowns.

Rachel wipes at her cheeks with the back of her hand. "Okay," she barely mumbles.

* * *

Negan closes his bedroom door, and turns to Rachel.

"Why is he here? What the hell happened?" Rachel demands to know.

"Okay. First of all, could you ask one question at a fucking time," Negan says.

"I'm not playing, Negan!" Rachel snaps. Her eyes widen. "Is it Rick? Is he leading Alexandria?"

Negan stares at her, clenching his jaw. "Yes, he is. And why the fuck you ever followed that asshole, is beyond me?"

Rachel holds her head in her hands. "Did you know it was Rick?"

"No. How the fuck was i supposed to know? There must be a million fucking pricks named Rick out there," Negan points out. "But you know what? I wouldn't give two flying fucks if i did know! This is the same guy, that stormed through our outpost, that killed our people while they slept! That almost killed you!" Negan paces the room. "You think i'd go easy on him because you used to follow him once upon a fucking time? Fuck no!"

"Negan-," Rachel starts.

"No! You don't get to fucking look at me like i'm the bad guy! Not after what they did! Or have you already forgotten?" Negan asks coldly.

"Of course i haven't! But this is Rick! He must have had a bloody good reason for doing what he did!" Rachel shouts.

Negan breathes deeply, and places his hands on her shoulders. "Rachel. Listen to me. I don't know what he was like when you were following him, but he isn't the same guy anymore. You saw what he did. I know you like to see the best in people. I understand that. But you can't excuse what he did. We lost a shitload of people because of him," Negan wipes at a tear on her cheek. "Don't let this come between us, Rachel."

Rachel looks up at him. "I need to talk with him. With Rick."

Negan shakes his head. "That's not fucking happening."

"Why not?" Rachel asks.

"Because i don't want him poisoning you against me. And because i fucking said so," Negan frowns.

"If you have nothing to hide, then you wouldn't have a problem with me speaking to him," Rachel says.

"I don't want you speaking to him, because he's a fucking prick! A prick, that almost got you killed! Now, you can ask me any fucking question you want, and i'll answer it. But you're not speaking with him, and that's fucking final," Negan says. "And would you stop fucking looking at me like that! I fucking hate when you look at me like that!"

"Like what!" Rachel yells.

"Like you don't fucking know me! After all this time, all the shit we've been through, you still don't trust me, do you?" Negan frowns.

Rachel looks up at him, her eyes not leaving his. "No, i don't."

Negan clenches his jaw. His eyes burn into hers, not with lust, but with anger. "Fuck!" Negan kicks at the coffee table, flipping it over. He grabs a glass from the dresser and smashes it against the doors.

Rachel flinches, her hand going to her cheek.

Negan eyes are ablaze with fire. He glances over at Rachel, and his face drops as he sees blood dripping down her cheek. "Rachel," he rushes over to her, holding his arms out. But Rachel takes a step back, her hand covering her cheek. "I didn't mean to..i'm sorry."

Rachel turns away from him, and leaves.

* * *

She stands in front of the mirror in her room, cleaning the cut on her cheek. It's not much more than a scratch, and certainly won't leave a scar. The ache in her chest far outweighs the scratch on her cheek. Rachel stares at herself. _What do i do?_ She's been asking herself this question repeatedly for the past fifteen minutes. She rolls the heart locket on her chain between her fingers. _It's Daryl. You know Daryl!_ She thinks. _But do you?_ She counters. Rachel knows she isn't the same person she was when all this started. People change. Maybe Daryl changed? The Rick she knew would never kill people in cold blood. So maybe Negan is right?

She hears a knock at the door. Rachel opens it, greeted by a very sorry looking Negan.

Negan looks at the cut on her cheek. He looks at her like a dog looking at it's master in shame after piddling on the floor. "I'm so sorry. I never mean't to do that, i swear."

Rachel softens slightly. "I know," she relents, stepping aside.

Negan walks slowly into her room. "Have you been to Carson with that?"

"No," she shakes her head. "It's barely a scratch."

Negan nods his head. "I'd never purposely hurt you, i mean that. I just.. i'd trust you with my life, Rachel. Why can't you trust me with yours?"

"Because you hide things from me. How am i supposed to trust you?" She reasons.

Negan rubs his temples. "You know we have to make hard decisions. And i know, you don't always like the decisions i make, the way i handle things. But it has to be done, you know that."

"Why is Daryl here?" Rachel asks calmly.

Negan walks over to Rachel's chair, and sinks into it. "He's Rick's right hand man. Rick pissed me off, so i took him. I thought he'd make a good soldier."

Rachel sits on the coffee table in front of Negan. "Is he hurt? He didn't look too good," she swallows, her throat dry.

"Dwight shot him in the shoulder. It isn't fatal though, he'll be fine, provided he plays fucking ball," Negan assures her.

"Daryl won't break. I can tell you that now. Whatever you do to him, he'll never betray Rick," Rachel warns him.

"Really?" Negan raises an eyebrow.

"Really," Rachel nods.

"So what would you have me do?" Negan asks.

"Let him go," Rachel pleads, a tear falling down her face.

The sight of her crying for Daryl, only infuriates him. Negan struggles to keep his cool. "I can't do that."

"Why not? I know you Negan, you don't want him here," Rachel reasons.

"No, i don't fucking want him here. Not now i know who he fucking is!" Negan grimaces.

"Then why?" She asks.

"Because it's the best way to keep Rick in line! Do you realise how it'll make me look if i give him back?" Negan frowns.

"Don't hurt him, please," Rachel pleads.

"You're going to leave me, aren't you? First chance you get, you're going to run off with that redneck piece of shit!" Negan fumes, his eyes watering.

"I thought you said you trusted me?" Rachel frowns.

"I know how you feel about him. Trust goes out of the fucking window when it comes to shit like that," Negan's fingers dig deep into the arms of the chair.

"You don't know anything about how i feel, Negan," Rachel says.

Negan sits forward. He strokes her cheek. "You won't leave me, will you?"

"That's the last thing i want. But i won't watch you hurt him either. I can't sit back and let that happen, i can't!" Rachel cries.

"That doesn't have to happen. Like i said, if he-,"

"Negan," Rachel cuts in. She takes his hands in hers. "Daryl, will not break."

Negan sighs. "This isn't a debate, Rachel. You know i care about you, and normally, i'd do pretty much whatever to please you. But Daryl is mine now. And nothing you say is going to change that."

* * *

Rachel hangs around the corridor near Daryl's cell. She watches David speaking with Dwight. As David leaves, she heads towards Dwight.

"Dwight," Rachel says softly.

Dwight stares at her. "You're not supposed to be here."

"Dwight, just give me five minutes. I need to talk to him," Rachel pleads.

"I can't," Dwight shakes his head. "If Negan finds out, it'll be me in there," he turns away from her.

"I helped you," Rachel frowns.

"You shouldn't have," Dwight says.

Rachel stares at him, clenching her jaw. "No, i shouldn't," she says, before heading down the corridor.

* * *

Rachel sits on her motorbike, adjusting her gloves.

"If you go to Alexandria, don't expect Daryl to still be breathing when you get back," Negan says from behind her.

Rachel turns her head. "Is that a threat?"

"It's a promise," Negan says.

She steps off the bike, and stands in front of him. "You're painting yourself in a very bad light, i hope you know that."

"See it however you want to fucking see it. I see it, as keeping you safe," Negan says.

"By keeping me here?" Rachel frowns.

"I didn't say you couldn't leave. You're my girl, not my damn prisoner. But i won't have you going to Alexandria, and if i find out otherwise, then bye bye Daryl," Negan waves.

"You, bastard," Rachel scolds under her breath.

"Hey! There's no need to be like that!" Negan scowls.

"Screw you!" Rachel spits, storming back inside.


	27. Chapter 27

Rachel storms down the corridor. She brings her fist down against the stereo, cutting the music off.

"Negan said we're supposed to keep that playing," Joey says.

"I don't give a shit what Negan said! I'm sick of hearing it!" Rachel snaps.

Joey looks nervously at his feet.

"Anyway, you're needed at the gate," Rachel says.

"I'm not supposed to leave him alone, Negan said-,"

"Negan isn't here. He's out on a run. Daryl's not going anywhere," Rachel assures him.

"That's not why Negan has someone watching over him. You know that, Rachel," Joey reasons.

Rachel sighs. "Joey. What do you think i'm going to do? You think i'm going to break him out or something?"

Joey shakes his head. "No. But i can't go against Negan's rules. He doesn't want you speaking with, Daryl."

Rachel rubs her temples.

"You've always been nice to me. I'm gonna go get someone else to watch over him. So you got five minutes," Joey smiles.

Rachel looks up at Joey. "Thank you."

"Don't mention it. Seriously, ever," Joey says leaving.

Rachel watches him leave, then heads to the cell next door.

"Daryl," she whispers.

"Rachel?" Daryl says.

"Yeah. Are you.. are you okay?" Rachel asks, realising the stupidity of the question.

"I'll live," Daryl answers. His tone saying otherwise. "What are you doing with these people?"

Rachel's swallows deeply. "I've been here a while. Why did you attack us? At the satellite post?"

"They're bad people. You're with, bad people. We had to," Daryl answers.

"I was there. At the satellite post. I almost died," Rachel says.

"We only wanted Negan. He's not a good guy. You must know that," Daryl says.

Rachel leans back against the door. "I'm not sure i do."

"He killed Glenn," Daryl says.

Rachel's eyes widen. She turns towards the door, resting her hands against it. "What?"

"It's my fault," Daryl sniffs. "He killed Abraham, and that shoulda been it. But.. i took a swing at him.. and so.. he killed Glenn," Daryl sobs from within. "Maggie was there. She was sick, i don't even know if she made it outta there."

Rachel's stomach begins to turn. "What do i do?" Rachel whimpers. She's met with silence. "Daryl? What do i do? You have to tell me," Rachel pleads. She hears footsteps down the hall. "Daryl?" Rachel whispers. She makes her exit before she can be seen talking to him.

* * *

Rachel heads to the kitchen, only to be met by Dwight. She furrows her brows.

"Are those Daryl's clothes?" She frowns.

Dwight turns to her. "Yeah. Not like he'll be needing them," he says, a cigarette hanging out of his mouth.

Rachel lowers her voice. "How can you be so cruel."

Dwight laughs. "That's funny. Coming from someone who thinks the sun shines out of Negan's ass."

"I don't think that at all," Rachel stares at the sandwich Dwight is making. "What's that?" She asks, as her eyes take note of a tin of dog food.

"Daryl's dinner," Dwight smiles.

Rachel's face drops. "You're feeding him dog food!"

"Yeah. Dog food, for the dog," Dwight laughs.

Rachel grabs the tin, and throws it at him.

Dwight ducks, the tin barely missing his head. "Hey!" He yells, the cigarette dropping to the floor.

Rachel lunges at him, knocking him to the ground. Knees either side of him, she throws punch after punch at him. Two saviors grab her from behind, pulling her off Dwight. But not before she stamps her foot down on his crotch.

"Get off me!" She snarls.

Another savior runs into the kitchen. "What the hell's going on?"

"Get the fuck off me!" Rachel yells, kicking out.

"Stick her in the cells! Let her cool off!" The savior orders.

The two saviors who have a hold of her, glance at each other uncomfortably.

"I don't think Negan will like that," one of them says nervously.

"Negan's not here! Fucking do it!" He shouts.

The saviors reluctantly drag Rachel to the cells, throwing her in.

Rachel jumps up from the cell floor, but the door shuts in her face. She bangs against it. "Let me out!"

"I'm sorry," one of them says. "We're just following orders."

Rachel kicks at the door. "Let, me, out!" She takes a step back, then slumps to the floor.

"Rachel?" She hears.

Rachel moves closer to the wall. "Daryl?"

"You hurt?" He asks.

She shakes her head. "No."

"You should leave. First chance you get. Go see Rick," Daryl says.

Rachel rests her head against the wall. "I can't."

Daryl remains silent.

"I looked for you guys. After the prison. I tried so hard, i really did," tears stream down her face. "I don't know what to do, Daryl. I can't leave here. I.. i can't."

"You with him?" Daryl asks.

Rachel wipes at her face. "Yeah."

"Then you're not with us. Can't have it both ways. You're either with him, or us," Daryl says.

"I don't want anyone else to get hurt," Rachel says.

"Andrea wanted the same, look where that got her," Daryl points out.

Rachel holds her head in her hands.

* * *

Negan drives through the gates of the sanctuary. He turns off the stereo, not wanting Rachel to know that he's been listening to her Arctic Monkeys album. Negan frowns, as he catches sight of Gareth. He rolls down the window. "Don't fucking come to me with bad news. It'd be nice for once, if i could come back from a run, without everything turning to fucking shit!" Negan says.

"It's Rachel," Gareth says.

Negan jumps out of the truck. "She okay?"

"She's fine," Gareth assures him.

Negan clenches his jaw. "Has she gone? To Alexandria?"

Gareth shakes his head. "She.. she's in the cells."

Negan throws him a bemused look. "The cells? What do you mean, she's in the cells?"

"There was an incident with Dwight. She attacked him, and.. they put her in a cell, to try and calm her down," Gareth says.

Negan's face goes an angry shade of red. "They put, my girl.. in a fucking cell!" Negan growls. Negan rushes inside.

"I told them to let her out!" Gareth shouts after him.

* * *

Negan unlocks the cell door. Rachel lies on the floor, sleeping. "Rachel," Negan whispers, kneeling beside her.

She stirs, her eyes squinting at the light pooling in by the door.

"I'm so sorry, baby," Negan sits her up, and wraps his arms around her.

"You keep saying that," Rachel says against his chest.

Negan brings his hands up to her face, pulling away from her slightly. "You think i would've locked you up?"

"Was it your idea to feed him dog food?" She asks.

Negan tilts his head. "Is that why you attacked Dwight?"

"I don't know who you are," Rachel says. "I don't know you."

Negan tangles his fingers in her hair. "You do! You do know me!" He shakes her. Negan's eyes soften. "I'm the same guy, who stood with you on that stage, and held your fucking hand, and led you the fuck out of that sea full of dead. You.. you wouldn't leave me, even though i told you to. Why?"

Rachel shakes her head. "I don't know."

"You do know!" Negan shakes her lightly. "Christ! You're impossible, you know that! You drive me fucking insane!"

Rachel drops her head, her shoulders trembling as she cries.

Negan pulls her head against his chest, stroking the back of her hair. Rachel grasps at his leather jacket as she sobs against his chest. She curses herself at the realisation that she's taking comfort from the same person who has imprisoned Daryl.

They both make their way along the corridor. Rachel stops as she sees Dwight coming in their direction. Dwight stops in front of them. He's sporting a black eye, and a busted lip.

"Rachel. I just want you to know, there's no hard feelings," he says sincerely.

Rachel takes a step towards him. Negan grabs her arm gently, ensuring she can go no further.

"From now on, you stay away from me. You so much as look at me in the wrong way. I'll mess this side of your face up so bad, it'll make that side look good," she snarls.

Negan chuckles, stroking the back of her arm.

Dwight swallows loudly, then nods as they walk away.

* * *

A week had passed. Rachel had spent every opportunity attempting to speak with Daryl, much to Negan's annoyance.

"I don't know what the fuck to do?" Negan confides in Simon. "Short of sticking a fucking bell on her, and trust me, i'm not fucking ruling that out!"

Simon leans against a railing outside the sanctuary. "She hasn't gone to Alexandria though, that's something."

"It's not though. The only reason she hasn't been to see that prick Rick, is because she's worried about Daryl. It's got fuck fucking all to do with loyalty," Negan frowns.

Simon shakes his head. "I don't know. I trust her."

Negan raises an eyebrow. "You still fucking sweet on her?"

"Shit, i'd have to be blind otherwise," Simon smiles. "All jokes aside. I don't think she'd betray us."

"She's not like us Simon. I wish she was more.. fuck! I can't find the fucking word," Negan frowns.

Simon nods. "I know what you mean."

"She's too fucking nice for her own good. Christ knows i've made fucking allowances for it," Negan says.

"That's why you like her so much though. And she's actually made some pretty good calls. Like Robert. You would've killed him after he cost Chris his arm, and now look at him. He's one of our strongest soldiers," Simon points out.

"I know. I just.. i feel like i'm fucking losing her. I wish i could just get rid of Daryl. But my hands are fucking tied. I can't give him back to Rick, and i can't fucking kill him either. So what? I got him cleaning up piss, and working the damn fence," Negan sighs.

"Maybe you could go out on a run together? That normally works," Simon suggests.

Negan shakes his head. "Not this time it won't. This is different. A part of her is still loyal to Rick. Even after everything he's done to us. I don't know how to move forward with this?"

"She's just confused right now. She'll come around," Simon says.

"I fucking hope so," Negan frowns, staring off into the distance.


	28. Chapter 28

Rachel sat with her feet up on Negan's sofa with a book in her lap, and music playing through a set of headphones. Things had been strained between the two of them to say the least. Seeing Daryl silently scrubbing the floors of the sanctuary wasn't helping either. Daryl had tried to escape, and had gotten a beating for it. Rachel and Negan had argued through the night over it. Then she had stormed out, and gone hunting for two days. Negan had been furious with her, as she hadn't even taken a radio. Rachel had wanted to go to Alexandria. Every fibre of her being had screamed at her to go. But Negan's words had played in her head. Knowing full well that Negan probably had men watching the roads to Alexandria, she had decided against it and gone back to the sanctuary.

The doors to Negan's room swing open, and she glances up from her book. It's Negan, and he's not alone. He opens his mouth, but of course, she can't hear. Rachel removes her headphones.

"Well now i know why you didn't hear the damn gunshots," Negan smiles.

"What gunshots?" Rachel frowns.

Negan talks, but she doesn't hear him. She's too busy staring at the boy beside him. Rachel doesn't recognise him instantly, as he's barely a boy anymore. It's his hat that she recognises.

"Carl?" She says, her eyes wide.

"Oh, fuck. I didn't even fucking think about that, of course, you know each other, right?" Negan grins.

Carl stares at her. "Rachel. What are you doing here? Are you.. one of his wives?"

"No," Rachel says instantly.

Negan pouts childishly. "Jesus, could you say that any fucking faster?"

Rachel makes her way to Carl, and hugs him. Negan doesn't attempt to put a stop to it. She holds him at arms length. "What happened to your eye?" Rachel throws an accusing look at Negan.

"Hey! Don't look at me. It was like that when i met him," Negan says. "Anyway, sweetheart. I hate to cut this reunion short. But Carl and i need to talk, man to man."

"What's he doing here?" She frowns.

"Little fucker was hiding in one of my trucks. Shot up a bunch of my men," Negan points his finger at Carl.

Rachel walks over to Negan. "Don't you hurt him. He's just a kid, if you-,"

"Chill your fucking boots," Negan waves a hand in front of her. "This, is between me, and him."

Rachel stares at him then looks at Carl. "Look at you. You're towering above me," she smiles.

Negan rolls his eyes. "Everyone fucking towers above you. Come on, sweetheart. I can't exactly have a serious fucking talk with him if you're gonna start crying like some long lost fucking Aunt."

Rachel looks from Carl to Negan, then leaves.

* * *

"If he hurts Carl, i'll kill him," Daryl says.

Rachel turns around in the corridor. "He won't," she assures him.

He shakes his head. "You don't know that."

"You think i'd leave Carl in there if i thought Negan was going to hurt him? Is that what you think of me, Daryl?"

"Nah. I just think you don't really know what kinda person he is. You can't see it, cos you're too close to it. And it's probably too late for you to step back," Daryl says.

"Nothing's the same, Daryl. We've all changed. You're not the same guy i met back at the prison, and from the sounds of it, neither is Rick," Rachel says.

"Keep telling yourself that, till it feels right," Daryl looks away, and goes back to cleaning the floor.

* * *

Rachel sits outside on the sanctuary steps. She opens her locket, staring at Negan's stupid grin. But it isn't stupid at all, in fact, it melts her heart. She hates that.

Rachel breathes a sigh of relief as she sees Negan stepping outside with Carl. She watches him head towards one of the trucks. "Where you going?" Rachel asks, making her way over to them.

"Taking this little shitbag back to Alexandria," Negan smiles. "See, i can be reasonable. Haven't hurt so much as one damn hair on his head."

"You want me to come with you?" Rachel asks.

"Later," Negan rolls his tongue over his lip.

"I'm being serious," Rachel frowns.

"Me too. It's a serious fucking business. My balls are damn near close to exploding," Negan chuckles.

"Negan," Rachel says.

"No, you can't fucking come to Alexandria. I thought i'd already made that fucking clear?" He raises an eyebrow.

"You can't keep me away from there forever. We're all supposed to be working together," Rachel points out.

Negan takes a deep breath. "I know that. But for now i can. I'll see you later. Try and make sure this place doesn't turn to shit while i'm gone, okay?" He says, kissing her forehead.

Rachel nods. She watches them leave, then heads back inside.

* * *

Rachel steps out of the shower, Negan's bathroom thick with steam. She wipes at the mirror with her hand, staring at her reflection. She gathers her clothes on the bed, then hears a knock at the door. "One minute!" Rachel shouts, throwing her clothes on. "What is it?" She asks, opening the door.

Gareth stands there, his breath heavy. "It's fat Joey. He's dead."

Rachel's eyes widen. "What?"

"Dwight just found him outside. Someone smashed his head in," Gareth says.

"Oh my god," Rachel whispers.

"There's more. Daryl's missing," Gareth adds.

"Since when?" Rachel asks.

"We're not sure. But one of the bikes is missing, that's where we found Joey," Gareth says.

"You think Daryl did it?" Rachel frowns.

"Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out it was Daryl. But.. someone must have let him out, because he was locked up," Gareth says.

Rachel stares at him. "You're not looking at me, are you?"

"Hell no," Gareth shakes his head. "I wouldn't think that. Besides, i know you've been here for the last hour or so."

Rachel rubs her temples. "Negan's going to hit the roof."

"Tell me about it. He's not gonna be too happy with Dwight either. He was supposed to be in charge of Daryl," Gareth says. "What do you want us to do?"

"You're asking me?" Rachel asks, surprised.

"Well, yeah. You're the only person here right now that has the most authority," Gareth says.

Rachel stares at him, then nods. "Someone keep an eye on Dwight, make sure he doesn't leave the sanctuary. Get someone to count heads, make sure no one else is missing. I'll have someone sort out a burial for Joey," Rachel says.

"What about Daryl?" He asks.

Rachel glances down at her feet. "Send out an alert over the radio. Tell them to keep an eye out for Daryl. If they see him, he's to be brought back to the sanctuary, unharmed! I'll send a group out to look for him."

"Wouldn't it be better if you went out, what with your tracking skills?" Gareth suggests.

"It would, but i'm not sure Negan would like that," Rachel shakes her head.

"Okay, i'll get right on it," Gareth nods.

* * *

Negan drives through the gates of the sanctuary. He smiles as he sees Rachel waiting for him.

"Negan, something happe-," she starts.

"I already know," Negan cuts her off. "Heard on the radio."

"I sent men out looking for him," Rachel says. She stands back and takes a good look at him. "Jesus! What happened?"

Negan's smile widens, the blood on his face making him appear crazed. "Just some shit at Alexandria."

"What did you do?" Rachel frowns.

"Relax, sweetheart. I did Rick a fucking favour. One of his men went behind his back. Came to me like a sniveling weasel, wanted me to put him in charge," Negan says.

"So you killed him?" Rachel asks.

"Fuck yeah i did! And you know what else? One of his people took a shot at me. You see this!" Negan points at Lucille.

"Is that a bullet?" Rachel frowns.

"Yep! Can you fucking believe that? If it wasn't for Lucille, i'd be fucking dead right now. She should get the award for best wife ever!" Negan smiles. "Don't be jealous, baby. You're right fucking up there with her."

Rachel shakes her head in disbelief. "I'm not your wife."

"Fucking close enough. Any fucking hoo. I heard you stepped up while i was gone," Negan smiles.

"I had to. Gareth came to me, asked me what i wanted them to do." Rachel says.

"Good," Negan nods. "I like that. Though, i can't say i'm too fucking pleased that you ordered my men not to harm Daryl. But.. i guess i can let that slide. Least you stepped the fuck up."

"Are you going to keep it that way?" Rachel asks.

Negan raises his eyebrow, Lucille resting against his shoulder. "Do i have a fucking choice?"

"There's always a choice, Negan," Rachel says.

"Okay, we'll do it your way. I'll have my men keep looking for him, and i'll tell them to bring him back unharmed," Negan leans over her. "Know, that i'm only fucking doing that for you."

Rachel nods.

"Do we know who let him out?" Negan asks.

"No. But there has been another development," Rachel says.

"What's that?" Negan frowns.

"Sherry's missing," Rachel says.

"Fuck! I'm gonna have to deal with Dwight," Negan brushes a hand over his face.

Rachel glances over at one of the trucks. "Who's that?"

"That's our new bullet maker," Negan grins. "He made the bullet that almost killed me. I'm hoping he'll be useful."

"So, you've just taken him?" Rachel rubs at her temples.

"Yes, i fucking have. You should know by now. If i want something, i fucking take it. He's lucky he's still breathing, so it's a win for everyone really," Negan reasons.

Rachel shakes her head. "You know what? I just.. let's go inside, shall we?"

* * *

Rachel wanders through the woods. She'd been out long before sunrise, and hadn't caught anything yet. But going out on a hunt today, had more to do with getting some much needed space, than actually finding food. She had spent the night with Negan, and had woken up in the early hours feeling guilty. How someone could make her feel so good, and yet so bad at the same time, bewildered her. So she'd gone out on a hunt, to attempt to clear her head. She rambled on randomly, no trail in sight.

A branch snaps to her left, and she aims her arrow. She frowns, as she hears the telltale sound of footsteps. Not walker steps, but human.

"Who's there?" She calls out. The footsteps cease. "I know someone's there, so come out!"

She fully expects it to be one of Negan's men, keeping an eye on her. So she's quite rightly surprised, when a familiar face comes out with his hands up.

"Jesus?" Rachel tilts her head. "What are you doing out here?"

Jesus stops a few feet in front of her. "I was following you."

"Well that's not weird," she says sarcastically.

"We just want to talk, that's all," Jesus says.

"We?" Rachel asks puzzled.

She hears footsteps from behind Jesus. And then another familiar face.

"Rick," she whispers, her mouth suddenly dry.


	29. Chapter 29

"Rachel," Rick nods. "I can't believe you made it out of the prison."

"Yeah, well. I'm made of strong stuff," she smiles nervously. "Judith?"

"She's fine," Rick smiles.

"What are you doing here?" Rachel asks.

"Carl said he'd seen you, up at the sanctuary. And i spoke with Daryl this morning," Rick says.

Rachel's eyes widen. "Is Daryl okay?"

"Yeah. He's at Hilltop," Rick says.

"You shouldn't be here, Rick. Negan's got eyes and ears all over the place," Rachel frowns.

"We were careful," Jesus says.

Rachel nods. "What do you want, Rick?"

Rick tilts his head, letting out a deep breath. "Your help."

"With what?" Rachel asks, surprised.

"This needs to stop. Negan's out of control, do you know how many people he's killed of ours?" Rick asks.

Rachel rubs her temples. "Not even close to how many we lost to you."

"It's not the same," Rick says.

"Why? Because it's your people? Who are you to dictate which lives matter?" Rachel asks.

"You know he killed Glenn, right? Maggie's pregnant, and now, he's left her a widow," Rick says.

Rachel looks down at her feet. "What do you expect me to say?"

"That you'll help make this right," Rick frowns.

"What about my people?" Rachel snaps. "I was at the outpost when you attacked us. You think you would've spared me?"

"Well someone did, otherwise you wouldn't be here," Rick points out. "You're a good person, Rachel. You don't belong with the saviors. You belong with us."

Rachel shakes her head. "What makes you think that you're the good guy? You killed people whilst they slept!"

"We had to. Negan and his saviors are nothing more than violent thieves. They just take what they want, and to hell with anyone else," Rick says.

"So what's your plan?" Rachel frowns. "You're going to take out all the saviors? There's too many of us, Rick."

"It doesn't have to come to that. If we take out Negan, that should be enough," Rick says.

Rachel grinds her teeth. "You really think i'm going to let that happen?"

"It's what needs to be done! You know that!" Rick spits.

"No, i don't know that. I'd take a bullet for Negan, do you understand?" Rachel stresses.

Rick stares at her. "Why don't you kneel like everyone else? Daryl said he's never seen you kneel."

"I.. i just don't," Rachel says.

Rick tilts his head. "Negan expects everyone to kneel, so what makes you so special?"

"I'm not special, i just-," Rachel starts.

"No, i'm not buying that for one second. I know you're with him," Rick says.

"So. That doesn't make me special. And if you knew Negan, you'd know that," Rachel says.

Rick raises an eyebrow. "I know all about his wives, if that's what you mean. But you're not like them. Daryl said they never leave the compound, and that Negan's different around you."

"Daryl's been quite observant, hasn't he," Rachel quips.

"You know the difference between right and wrong, Rachel. Taking people prisoner, burning people's faces, that's not you," Rick insists.

"Things aren't that simple anymore, Rick. You can't tell me, that you've always done the right thing. Only that you've done the right thing for your group," Rachel says.

"Daryl said you were too close to this. He said he still thinks you're good, but that you wouldn't help, because you're letting Negan fool you. You remember Andrea?" Rick frowns.

Rachel frowns, her face growing red. "Oh come on, Rick! This is nothing like Andrea and the Governor!"

"It's exactly like that! You just can't see it!" Rick shouts.

"I'm under no illusions with Negan! I know what he can do, i've seen it!" Rachel snaps.

"Then why? How can you be with someone like that?" Rick asks.

"You're on the outside looking in. It's easy for you to think you're the good guy, because everything you do, you do it for your people," Rachel says.

Rick's face drops. "You love him, don't you."

Rachel stares at her feet. "That's none of your business, and it doesn't matter."

"It does matter. I came here, asking you for help. I need you, we, need you. Don't turn me away," Rick pleads.

Rachel clenches her jaw, her eyes brimming with tears. "I can't. I won't tell Negan about this, but i can't help you, Rick. I'm sorry."

"So you're gonna fight against us? Because that's what it'll come down to," Rick points out.

Rachel grits her teeth and walks away.

"You're gonna have to pick a side, Rachel. You can't sit on the fence forever!" Rick shouts after her.

"Well that went well," Jesus says.

Rick shoots him a nasty look. "It could've gone better."

Jesus shrugs. "So plan b then?"

Rick closes his eyes and sighs. "Plan b," he nods. "But not yet."

* * *

Rachel heads back to the sanctuary empty handed. She goes straight to Carson's office, but finds it empty. Rachel heads to Negan's room.

"Hey, beautiful!" Negan smiles, getting up from the sofa. "You catch anything good?"

Rachel shakes her head. "No."

Negan frowns. "Really? That's not like you."

"I don't feel so good. Have you seen Carson?" She asks.

"He's spending some time in the cells," Negan says.

"What? Why?" Rachel frowns.

"Found a note from Sherry in his office," Negan says.

"Oh come one, Negan. You're not stupid enough to think he had something to do with Daryl and Sherry escaping?" Rachel frowns.

"I'm not one hundred fucking percent! That's why he's in a cell, and not fucking dead!" Negan says. He takes a look at Rachel. "Hey, you don't look too good, baby. What did you want to see him for?"

"Nicotine gum," Rachel says. She suddenly feels lightheaded, her mouth fills with warm saliva. She runs to the bathroom, and throws up her previous meal. The room becomes darker, as Negan leans against the door frame.

"Are you pregnant?" Negan asks softly.

"What?" Rachel asks, grabbing a tissue.

"It's just, you were sick yesterday, i heard you. It wouldn't be a bad thing, Rachel. In fact, i think it would be fucking awesome!" He smiles.

Rachel wipes at her mouth, and turns to face him. "It'd be a fucking awful thing to happen, Negan. You really think this is a good world to bring a child into?"

"We're making this world better," Negan says.

Rachel shakes her head. "No, we're not."

Negan pouts childishly. "So you're not pregnant then?"

"No, it's just stress. I can't have anymore," she assures him.

"Oh," Negan furrows his brow. "Hey, wait. Did you just say you can't have anymore?"

Rachel looks at him nervously. "I meant i can't have any, you know what i meant."

"Rachel, did you have a kid?" Negan asks.

Rachel opens her mouth to speak, and closes it again. She goes over to the sink and begins brushing her teeth.

"Rachel, talk to me," Negan says softly.

Rachel points at her toothbrush.

"Well, when you're done with that then," Negan says.

Rachel finishes brushing her teeth, and looks in the mirror. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Rachel, you can talk to me about anything," Negan assures her. He walks over to her, slipping his arm around her waist.

Rachel turns to him. "He'd be seven now," she looks down at the ground. "His name was James. He was the best thing i ever did," she smiles. "I got an infection not long after he was born, it left scarring on my womb. I couldn't get pregnant after that."

Negan brings his hand up to her face, stroking her cheek. "Why don't you ever talk about him?"

"Because it hurts, it's easier to forget," Rachel says.

"What.. what happened to him," Negan asks softly.

Rachel shakes her head. "I don't know. He was back in England with his dad, so i don't know," she sniffs, tears rolling down her cheeks. "And, i'll never get to know."

"Jesus," Negan frowns, pulling her close to him. He holds her as she sobs against him, stroking the back of her hair.

"I don't want to talk about it again, ever," Rachel mumbles against his chest.

"Okay," Negan nods. "We don't have to."

They hold one another for a while, standing in the bathroom in silence.

"It's late," Negan says. "Maybe we should go to bed."

Rachel nods. She wipes at her eyes with the back of her hand.

They both undress for bed, Negan stripping down to his boxers. And Rachel slipping into one of Negan's t-shirts. They lie together, holding one another.

"So, you don't think you can have anymore?" Negan asks.

Rachel shakes her head. "But why would i want to? Why would anyone want to bring children into a world like this?"

"I'd like to," Negan says.

Rachel sits up on the bed. "Negan, don't you think it's a little strange?"

Negan raises an eyebrow. "How is wanting kids strange?"

"That's not what i meant. I mean, you have six wives," Rachel says.

"Seven," Negan corrects her.

Rachel frowns. "Seven? Since when do you seven?"

"Amber," Negan smiles.

"Right, i forgot about her. You know, this conversation is turning really weird," Rachel says.

"You fucking started it," Negan grins.

"Anyway. My point is. You have, seven wives, and not one of them has ever gotten pregnant," Rachel points out.

Negan's face drops, his smile slowly fading. "What are you trying to say? Are you saying i've got slow swimmers?" Negan frowns.

"Maybe, i mea-," Rachel starts.

Negan's face goes red. "I don't have slow swimmers. That's fucking bullshit! My swimmers could win a fucking olympic medal or some shit!"

"Negan, i didn't-,"

"No! I'm not having this fucking conversation!" He stares at her, a confused look on his face. "You know what? For that, i'm not putting out!" Negan lays down and turns away from her.

Rachel sits there, her mouth agape, not knowing what to say. "Do you want me to leave?"

"No!" He snaps. "You can stay right fucking there, just don't fucking talk to me."

Rachel slowly lays down, staring at the back of Negan's head. She lies that way for five minutes, before she wraps her arm around him. She nuzzles her nose between his shoulder blades, gently curling her fingers through his chest hairs. Negan breathes deeply and holds her hand. Rachel kisses his shoulder, slowly grazing her teeth over him till he breaks out in gooseflesh.

Negan turns to her, running his hand under her t-shirt. He kisses her softly, sucking on her bottom lip.

Rachel rolls on top of him, running kisses over his neck. She moans lightly as he runs his hands all over her body, his kiss becoming more passionate and needy. He pulls her t-shirt over her head, then tugs at her panties. Rachel pulls his boxers off, feeling his erection against her thigh. She feels him twitching beneath her as she rubs herself against him. There's no foreplay, just pure raw need, as she slides him inside her. Rachel claws at his chest as he fills her completely.

Negan groans deeply, as she rolls her hips slowly. He trails his fingers down her back, his hands settling on her hips. "Oh, Rachel, i've fucking missed this," he groans, his breath heavy.

Rachel kisses him hard, her hand tangled in his hair. She rolls her hips faster, biting on his bottom lip.

Negan wraps his arms around her, pulling her closer against him. He lifts his thighs up off the bed, going deeper inside her.

"Negan," Rachel moans against his mouth. She rocks her hips against him, her thighs tensing as she feels herself getting close.

"Come for me, baby," Negan growls against her ear.

Rachel rolls her hips faster, as Negan pushes his further off the bed. "Negan, oh god!" She cries, clawing at his shoulders as her orgasm hits her.

Negan feels her pulsating against his cock, and that's enough for him to meet his own release. "Fuck! Rachel!" He groans, his legs tensing as he shoots his load inside her.

They lie that way for a while, stroking one another.

Rachel rolls off him, her breath still heavy. Negan grabs her waist, rolling her towards him.

"Maybe we can make a deal?" Negan suggests.

"What's that?" Rachel asks.

"I won't ever mention your son, if you don't ever mention, you know, my swimmers," Negan says.

Rachel nods. "Okay."

Negan kisses her forehead, and wraps his arms around her.


	30. Chapter 30

Rachel flicks on her radio. She was supposed to have checked in hours ago, but she'd been busy following a trail.

"This is Rachel. Just checking in. I've got a trail, little bugger keeps slipping away from me. I'll radio again in about four hours, over."

The radio crackles in her hand. "Rachel, it's Negan. You need to get you're ass back to the sanctuary, over."

Rachel frowns. "But i've got a trail, over."

"We've been attacked. I don't want you out there, you hear me? Over."

Rachel's heart pounds in her chest. "Attacked? By who? Is everyone okay? Over."

"Rachel, just get your ass back here! Over and out."

Rachel stares at the radio. She tosses it on the passenger seat, then speeds down the road.

* * *

She pulls in through the gates of the sanctuary. Rachel steps out of the truck.

"Gareth, what the hell happened?" She asks as he makes his way over to her.

"Some woman from Alexandria came in, all guns blazin. She's in a cell now though," Gareth says.

"Where's Negan?" Rachel frowns.

"He's around, not sure where," Gareth shakes his head.

Rachel heads inside. She scours the corridors searching for Negan. She finds him in his room, standing near the window sipping a glass of whiskey. Negan turns to her, sighing with relief. He makes his way over to her, placing his glass on the coffee table. Negan wraps his arms around her, lifting her off the floor.

"Jesus, Rachel. I was worried about you," he says.

Rachel breathes deeply, taking in his scent. "I'm fine. Are you gonna put me down and tell me what the hell happened here?"

Negan loosens his grip, but still refuses to let her go completely, his hands firmly gripping her waist. "We lost four men, no, five."

Rachel shakes her head. "How?"

"Woman's a badass, obviously. She came in here on her own. Her only objective was to take me the fuck out," Negan says.

"Do we know who she is?" Rachel asks.

Negan clenches his jaw. "She's from Alexandria."

Rachel's face drops. "You can't think Rick knows about this?"

Negan takes his hands from her waist and grabs his whiskey. "No, i don't. It was a suicide mission, and she assured me that Rick knows nothing about it."

"So what are you going to do?" Rachel frowns.

"I'm going there a few hours after sunrise, gonna have to lay down the damn rules again."

"Negan, you just said he had nothing to do with it," Rachel reasons.

Negan takes a sip of his whiskey. "No, he didn't. But i've had a little birdie tweeting in my ear. Rick's looking to rise up against me."

"Who?" Rachel asks.

Negan taps his nose, his mouth curling into a smile.

"So what are you going to do about the woman?" Rachel frowns.

"I'm gonna take her back to Alexandria, safe and fucking sound," Negan smiles.

Rachel raises an eyebrow. "Really?"

Negan wraps his arms around her waist. "Really. And, i want you to come with me."

Rachel looks up at him. "I'm not sure i want to. From the sounds of it, things could get ugly."

"Exactly!" Negan grins. "So you, my beautiful badass, are gonna have to pick a side. You can't keep sitting on the fucking fence, or you'll just get splinters in your ass!"

Rachel almost shivers at the similarity between his and Rick's words. "You don't think i'm on your side?"

Negan strokes her hair. "I think, that you want everyone to get the fuck along," he shakes his head. "But it doesn't work like that. Sooner or later, you have to pick a side, baby."

Rachel plays nervously with her locket. She looks into Negan's eyes, tears falling down her cheeks. "Don't," she shakes her head. "Don't make me go there. I can't hurt them."

Negan's face drops. It wasn't the reaction he'd been hoping for, and now he was torn. "Rachel, i need you there," negan gently places his hand against her shoulder. "Look, you're not gonna have to fight them. Rick doesn't have the numbers, even he fucking knows that! He's not gonna fight."

"You're underestimating him, you shouldn't do that," Rachel warns him.

"I don't think i am, baby," Negan smiles. "Just, tell me you'll come with me. I need you by my side."

Rachel drops her shoulders in defeat and nods. "Okay."

"Atta, girl!" Negan smiles, pulling her into him. "You'll be glad to know that David's dead."

Rachel pulls away from him. "Why would i be glad?"

"Come on, you never fucking liked the guy," Negan frowns.

"I know, doesn't mean he deserved to die though," Rachel says.

"Actually, he fucking did. I caught him trying to rape Sasha-," Negan starts.

"Sasha? Who's Sasha?" Rachel interrupts.

"The woman from Alexandria. Anyway, i killed that fucker right in front of her, so i guess you were right about him," Negan says. "Oh shit, i bet you probably fucking know her. She didn't talk much, probably because she hates my fucking guts. But she did say she first met Rick at a prison."

Rachel nods. "Yeah, i do know her. You promise me we're going to get her back to Alexandria unharmed."

Negan rolls his eyes. "Jesus, Rachel! I already fucking said that! You gotta learn to start fucking trusting me, baby."

"Says the guy who doesn't trust me enough to tell me which birdie has been whistling in his ear," she says sarcastically.

"That's on a need to know basis, and you don't need to know," Negan smiles. "Come on. The sun's gonna be up soon. Let's get this show on the fucking road."

* * *

Rachel sits between Negan and Simon in the truck as they pull up to the gates of Alexandria. She listens as the guy they'd taken from Alexandria speaks over a megaphone. "What's he doing?"

Negan turns to her. "Trying to talk some sense into Rick. Doesn't look like he's fucking listening though."

Rachel's eyes widen as Rick ducks down on the platform above the gate. "What's he doing?"

Negan chuckles. "Fuck all, baby. That's what he's doing. Rick the prick has been double fucking crossed."

Rachel turns her head back towards the platform, and watches as a woman on Rick's side of the gate points her gun at him.

"Come on, baby," Negan smiles stepping out of the truck.

Rachel hesitantly steps out behind him, following him towards the now open gate.

Negan rests Lucille against his shoulder. "You ever hear the one about the stupid little prick named Rick who thought he knew shit but didn't know shit, and got everyone that he gave a fuck about killed?" He points a finger at Rick. "It's about you," Negan smiles. "You're all gonna put your damn gun's down."

Rick clenches his jaw. "No one drops anything!"

"You're shit out of luck, Rick," Negan smiles. "You just tried to blow us up, right? I get that. But Eugene, he's one of yours. You people, are fucking animals!"

Rachel shifts nervously beside him, not sure what's going to happen next.

"Dwight, Simon, chop chop," he gestures with his hand towards a truck.

Rachel watches as they unwrap a coffin and stand it on it's end. "What did you do?" She whispers to Negan.

"Relax, baby," he smiles, making his way over to the coffin. "You don't like Eugene anymore? What about Sasha?" He places his hand against his chest. "I know i do," he smiles. Negan taps Lucille against the coffin. "Got her all packaged for you, alive and well. I'm gonna make this fucking simple, Rick. I want all the guns you managed to scrape up, and, i want a person of your own choosing, for Lucille. Then, i gotta got me my Daryl back. I see you," Negan smiles, running his tongue over his lip. "And you know what? I want your pool table, and i want it all now! Or Sasha dies, then all of you.. probably."

Rick shifts his feet uncomfortably. "Let me see her."

Negan chuckles. "Alright," Negan taps Lucille against the coffin. "Sasha," he smiles. Negan pulls open the coffin and his eyes widen in horror as Sasha jumps out at him. "Holy shit!"

Rachel's heart pounds against her chest, as she watches Negan fall off the truck, Sasha falling with him. She freezes, as the sound of gunfire fills her ears.

"Jesus Christ, Rachel!" Simon yells, pulling at her shoulder. "Get down!"

Rachel crouches beside him as he fires shots towards the people of Alexandria. Her heart begins to sink in her chest. "Negan! Where is he?" She goes to move but Simon pulls her back.

"I'll go get him, but for Christ's sake, Rachel. Get your gun out!" Simon orders.

Rachel nods and takes the revolver from her belt. Rachel watches as Rick falls from the platform. Her instinct tells her to shoot the woman, and it takes every ounce of her not to do just that. She leans back against the tire of the truck, her breath heavy. Rachel turns her head towards the gates. The saviors must have pushed through, as the gate is clear. She rests her head against the back of her hand. "I can't do this," she whispers, tears rolling down her cheeks. Rachel stands up and runs towards the woods.

* * *

Negan and Simon run out of the gates of Alexandria.

"Did you see Rachel?" Negan yells, turning back towards Alexandria.

Simon shakes his head. "Last time i saw her, she was right here."

"So she could still be in there? I gotta go back," Negan frowns.

Simon pulls at his shoulder. "It's not safe."

"I don't give a shit if it's safe! It's fucking Rachel!" He shouts.

"If you go back in there, you'll be dead. Live to fight another day!" Simon shakes his head. "I don't think she's in there. She froze. She's probably on her way back to the sanctuary right now."

Negan clenches his jaw. He nods, then reluctantly makes his way to the truck.

* * *

Simon arrives at the sanctuary. Negan steps out of the truck before he has the chance to switch the engine off.

"Where's Rachel?" Negan shouts at his men on the gate.

His men look at one another, confused. "I thought she was with you?"

Negan slams Lucille against the door of the truck. "Shit! You hear that Simon? She isn't here!"

"She probably got out of there on foot," Simon reasons. "She's tough."

"Yes, she is, but she's also just one woman, Simon! And she's out there on her own!" Negan fumes.

"I'll go look for her myself," Simon assures him.

"To hell with that! I'm going," Negan moves towards the truck.

Simon makes his way over to Negan, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Negan, you need to speak with your people, tell them what happened.. and what's gonna happen next."

Negan stares at him, then nods. "Let's make it quick then. I'll talk to these fuckers, then i'll go find her myself."

* * *

Author's note.

 _So there are not many chapters left. I'm not sure how many, but it's definitely nearing it's end. Thanks to everyone for reading and for all the lovely reviews. I already knew how this was going to end before i started writing it, and that hasn't changed. I really love Rachel, and i'll be writing a prequel called Woodbury, which will give me a chance to explore some of the other characters. Obviously there won't be any Negan, but for anyone who genuinely likes Rachel, it'll give an insight to her character before she met Negan. Again, thanks for reading, you're all awesome._


	31. Chapter 31

"Negan, do you really think it's a good idea to go out there right now?" Simon asks gingerly.

Negan gives him a cold stare. "No, it's probably fucking not. But she's still fucking out there."

"We've got plenty of men that could go look for her," Simon tries to reason.

Negan rubs his temples. "I'm not gonna fucking sit here on my ass, while she's out there. She could be hurt."

"I'm sure she's fine," Simon says.

"Really? Then how come we haven't heard from her? We have outposts all over the fucking place, and she knows where they all are. If she was alright, then we would've heard from her by now. So, she's either hurt, or she doesn't want to be found."

Simon glances at his feet. "Where are you even going to start?"

Negan frowns. "I'm gonna start, by taking a goddamn truck! And hitting the fucking road!" Negan yells. He pinches his nose. "Make sure this place doesn't fucking turn to shit while i'm gone, okay?"

Simon nods. "Sure."

* * *

Negan drives down the road with no idea where he's going. _Think asshole! Where the fuck would she go?_ Negan switches on the stereo, and Arctic Monkeys blares out of the speakers. He turns the volume down, but leaves it playing. He taps his fingers against the steering wheel, then his eyes widen. He stops the truck and turns around, taking the next exit to his left.

Negan pulls up in front of the four storey apartment building. He leaves Lucille in the truck, and climbs the fire escape to the top floor. He breathes a sigh of relief, as he sees Rachel's bow on the coffee table. He climbs through the broken window, glancing around the apartment.

Rachel comes out of the bedroom, jumping a mile as she sees him. She places a hand against her chest. "Jesus! You nearly gave me a heart attack!"

Negan makes his way over to her and hugs her tight. It's not what he had intended to do. He'd had every intention of being cold with her, but he couldn't do it. Negan holds her at arms length. "What are you doing here?"

Rachel stares up at him. "I froze," she shakes her head. "I haven't done that in a long time. They say, in situations like that, it's fight, flight, or freeze. And i fucking froze, Negan!"

Negan holds her hands in his. "Look, maybe it's my fault. I shouldn't have asked you to go. I pushed you too fucking far. It's what i do, right? I fucking push people, try and get the best out of them, make them strong."

Rachel looks down at her feet. "I'm not strong."

Negan places his fingers under her chin. "Hey. You, are the strongest fucking person i know. It's just a damn shame that you're so fucking empathetic," he smiles.

"What happened? At Alexandria?" Rachel asks softly.

"Rick's still breathing, if that's what you mean? That fucking King asshole from the Kingdom showed up with a damn tiger, can you believe that?" Negan frowns.

"Is Daryl okay?" She asks.

Negan grips the top of her arm, his eyes going dark. "Please don't tell me you still love that redneck piece of shit? Well!" Negan bares his teeth, his grip around her tightening.

"Negan, you're hurting me," she whimpers lightly, trying to shake his hand from her.

Negan's eyes widen, then his face drops. He drops his hand. "I'm sorry, baby. I just.. do you? Do you still love him?"

"Not like you think, not any more," she says.

"Do you..," Negan drops his head.

"What?" She asks, her hand going to his cheek.

Negan looks deep into her eyes. He shakes his head. "Nothing."

"If you're going to war with Rick, you won't win."

"You're fucking joking, right? We have the numbers," Negan huffs.

Rachel shakes her head. "Doesn't matter. You know why he'll win?"

"Go on, fucking enlighten me," Negan smiles.

"Because his people love him. Rick's people follow him, because he's like family, they respect him. Our people follow you out of fear, mostly," Rachel says.

"My people respect me," Negan frowns.

"They fear you, and that's mostly a good thing, because a lot of them need to be scared. A lot of your soldiers need to fear you, because if they didn't, they'd be getting up to some pretty bad shit. But they don't love you like Rick's people do," she points out.

"So basically, you're saying love conquers all? I gotta say, that's some cheesy fucking shit, even for you," Negan raises an eyebrow.

"Let's go," Rachel says.

"Alright, come the fuck on then, we can be back at the san-," he starts.

"No," Rachel shakes her head. "Let's leave, start a fresh somewhere else, just the two of us."

Negan stares at her. "What? Are you fucking insane? I can't leave my people."

"Please, just think about it," Rachel pleads with him. "I don't want to lose you."

Negan smiles uncomfortably. "You're not gonna lose me, baby. I'm not fucking going anywhere till i'm good and ready. Just.. just come back with me, okay?"

Rachel nods. "Okay."

* * *

Negan leans back against his chair, Lucille sitting on the table in front of him.

"Somebody better tell me something good, i want some fucking good news for a change," Negan frowns.

Simon goes to open his mouth, then closes it.

Dwight shifts uncomfortably in his seat. "We've lost all contact with the satellite outpost."

"Fuck!" Negan slams his hand against the table. "Didn't i just, fucking, say, that i wanted some good news."

"We've still got Gregory," Simon gestures towards the Hilltop leader sitting beside him.

Negan leans forward. "Well, you'd better fucking deliver on your promise, Gregory." Negan looks around the room. "Where's Rachel?"

"She went out, hunting," Simon says.

Negan slams Lucille against the table. "How the fuck did that happen? Didn't i say, that she wasn't to leave the sanctuary, under any circumstances! Jesus fucking Christ! Doesn't anyone do as they're damn well told?"

Simon looks at him nervously. "She was gone before i even knew about it, you know what's she's like. And.. with no deliveries coming in, supplies are running low. She was just trying to help."

Negan rubs his temples. "Try and get through to her on the radio, tell her to get her ass back here."

The sound of gunshots fills their ears.

"What the fuck?" Negan frowns, getting up from his seat and making his way over to the window. He chuckles lightly. "It's Rick the prick and his merry gang. Come on, let's go have a little chat," he smiles, stepping outside.

* * *

Negan stands outside the sanctuary, looking down at Rick and his people. "Well what the fuck do we have here? Are you trying to play my dick is bigger than your dick? Cause it isn't," Negan smiles. "You know it isn't."

Rick comes out from behind the shield of a car. "This is an offer, the only one you're gonna get. We're giving you a chance to surrender. We'll let all your people go, they'll all be spared."

"So, i hand myself over, and you'll just, let my people go? What about me?" Negan smiles.

"You die, either way," Rick says.

Negan strokes his chin. "Hmm, you've given me a lot to think about, Rick," Negan bursts into laughter, slapping his thigh. "Aww, shit, i can't, i almost had my fucking self going there. So what are you going to do? You think you can tear these walls down? I tell you what's gonna happen," Negan clicks his fingers.

Rick's face drops as Gregory steps out of the door, standing next to Negan.

"Come on, Gregory, say your fucking piece," Negan says.

Gregory plays nervously with his hands. He clears his throat. "The Hilltop stands with Negan and the saviors. Anyone who fights against us, will be no longer welcome at Hilltop."

Negan pats Gregory's shoulder. "Well done, Gregory. You heard the man! Go home, before you have no fucking home!" Negan watches, waiting for Gregory's people to leave.

"Looks like Gregory isn't leading Hilltop anymore!" Maggie shouts.

Negan frowns. He turns to Gregory. "What fucking use are you? Pathetic piece of shit!" Negan kicks Gregory down the steps. He turns back to Rick. "So what's you're next move, asshole?"

"Offer still stands, you can surrender," Rick says.

Negan grins.

"You're gonna make me count?" Rick smiles. "Fine. Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven!" Rick doesn't make it to six. He aims his gun towards Negan and starts shooting.

* * *

Rachel hadn't gone too far from the sanctuary. She knew Negan would be mad at her for going out at all, but everyone needed to eat, and they were running low on food. Hot on the trail of something big, she figures she won't be out long anyway.

The sound of gunfire comes from the distance. Rachel spins on her heels, trying to determine which direction it's coming from. "Shit!" She frowns, and abandons the trail, running straight for the sanctuary.

The gunfire has attracted the dead. Rachel aims her arrow at a walker to her left, taking it out with a shot to the head. She can hear the dead. Most of them are on the road, but some are coming through the woods towards her. Rachel shoots an arrow at a walker ahead of her. She bends down to collect it, but another comes up behind her, so she runs, leaving the arrow behind. Rachel hears a whistle to her left, she stops. "Who's there?" She shouts. Rachel hears footsteps behind her. Before she has a chance to turn, she feels a blunt force against the side of her head, and then black.

* * *

Negan leans back against his chair once again. Six hours had gone by since Rick's attack, and now the sanctuary was surrounded by the dead.

"I wanna know, how, in the holy fuck! Did this happen?" He fumes.

Simon leans forward. "It's gotta be an inside job. It isn't just here, we've lost contact with most of the outposts. The only way, that they could have that kind of information, is from someone here."

"So you're saying we've got a rat?" Negan frowns.

Simon nods. "Yes, a big one."

"I think we know who as well," Regina says.

"Well why don't you fucking enlighten me?" Negan gestures with his hand.

"We all know who the odd person out is in the sanctuary," she says.

"Regina," Simon warns her, hoping she won't go any further.

"No," she snaps. "Someone has to say it."

"Well spit it the fuck out then," Negan says.

Regina taps her fingers on the table. "Rachel."

Negan clenches his jaw, his eyes going dark. "Excuse me?"

"She's the only one, other than Eugene, that has history with them. And, she's not-," she starts.

Everyone around the table flinches, as Negan slams Lucille against the table.

"Does anyone else share her opinion?" Negan almost growls.

"Not me," Simon says.

The others shake their heads.

Negan points Lucille towards Regina. "Rachel, is just as much a savior as you are. She works just as hard as any of you, she fucking feeds you. Yeah, she might be a bit fucking soft, but she wouldn't betray us. And i don't wanna hear otherwise, you fucking got that?" Negan snaps.

Regina nods her head. "Yes, i'm sorry."

Negan rests Lucille back on the table. "Good. Simon," Negan turns towards him. "Please tell me we've heard back from her."

"She isn't answering her radio," Simon says.

Negan pinches the bridge of his nose. "Everyone leave, except for Simon."

Negan waits for his men to leave the room, then he turns to Simon.

"Tell me what you really think, no bullshit, just the truth. I'll even put Lucille down," Negan says, laying her on the floor.

"I mean't what i said. I don't think this is Rachel. I think she does feel some kinda loyalty to Rick's group, but she wouldn't betray us," Simon assures him.

"I agree," Negan leans back, taking a deep breath. "We should've heard from her by now. If it's like you said, and she didn't go that far out, she would've heard the gunshots. She would've gotten through on the radio, and i can't think of a good reason why she wouldn't fucking do that?" Negan swallows back tears, as Simon looks away.

"We need to focus on clearing the dead outside, then we can go look for her," Simon says.

Negan rises out of his seat, staring out at the dead. "We find her, then we get shit in order."


	32. Chapter 32

Rachel rolls onto her back, her eyes flickering open slowly. She stares at the ceiling above her, wincing as she rubs the side of her head. She remembers hearing gunshots from the direction of the sanctuary, and running towards the sound of them. Rachel also remembers someone clocking her in the head. She leans up on her elbows, looking down at the mattress which she lies upon. A candle burns next to her, almost down to the wick. _What the hell?_ She frowns as she looks to her left. It's a door, with bars on it. Rachel grabs the saucer with the candle, and makes her way over to the door.

"Hello," she whispers. Rachel clears her throat and raises her voice. "Hello!"

She hears footsteps from above her. A light flickers on to her left, and she sees a flight of stairs. A pair of dusty boots steps down them. Rachel's face drops.

"Rick. What the hell is this?"

Rick stands outside the cell door. "I'm sorry about all this," he gestures at the door.

Rachel shakes her head. "I don't understand?"

"This wasn't my first idea. It's not what i wanted to do, not really. When i spoke to you out in the woods. I mean't what i said," Rick shakes his head. "You don't belong with them."

"What! So you're just stealing me back?" Rachel frowns.

Rick glances at the floor, then looks at her. "You're a bargaining chip."

"A what?"

"As long as we have you, Negan will be too afraid to make any bold moves," Rick says.

Rachel places the candle on the floor beside her. "This is just.. stupid," she stares at him bemused. "Negan isn't afraid of anything."

"You're wrong. He's afraid of losing you. If i could do this any other way, i would. But you're his only weakness," Rick tilts his head. "You don't have to get hurt, you don't even have to do anything. You just sit here, till it's all over."

Rachel shakes her head. "No, that won't work. What do you think he's going to do? He's not going to surrender just because you have me."

"No, i don't think he will. But when he finds out we have you, he's not gonna be thinking straight. He's gonna come straight here, which is exactly where i want him," Rick says.

"So this is what you do now? You kidnap people?" Rachel frowns.

"I'm gonna do whatever i have to, to keep my people safe. That's what a leader does. How you can look at me like that when you've seen what Negan has done, what he's capable of," Rick grimaces.

"So what's your plan? You're gonna take out every last savior?" Rachel asks.

Rick shakes his head. "No, not all of them. Dwight's assured me he can lead the rest."

Rachel's eyes widen. "Dwight? He's double crossing us?"

"He came to me off his own back, said he wanted to make things right," Rick says.

Rachel holds onto the bars and laughs. "Oh Jesus! Dwight? The same Dwight who spent weeks trying to break Daryl? You're putting your trust in him."

"It's not like i have a choice. It's like you said, i can't take all the saviors out, and a lot of the people at the sanctuary are innocent. We just need to take Negan out, and then Dwight can lead from there," Rick says.

"Do you have any idea what kind of people some of Negan's saviors are? If you did, you'd understand why Negan has such strict rules," Rachel frowns.

"Dwight thinks he can keep them inline. And if he can't, then i'll have to execute them," Rick says.

Rachel shakes her head. "How did we get to here, Rick?"

Rick glances at the floor. "It's just the way it is now. I still think you're a good person, Rachel."

"I am a good person. I've made some not so great choices at times, but i've never really lost who i truly am. Can you say the same about yourself?" She asks.

Rick stares at her. "No, i can't. But you can't look me in the eye, and tell me that Negan isn't the bad guy?"

"You're right, i can't. But i can't say that about you either," she shakes her head. "This world, it makes you do things. If you let it, it'll turn you into a monster. Sometimes, that's the only way a person can get by. Doesn't mean you can't peel back the layers though, see what's underneath."

"Put yourself in my shoes. What would you do?" Rick asks.

Rachel steps away from the bars, turning away from him. "You were going to let the governor live."

"Yeah, i was. But that would've been a mistake and you know that," Rick says.

Rachel rubs her temples. "I know. But the governor was evil, Rick."

"What, and Negan isn't?" Rick snorts.

"No, he isn't. You just think he is because he killed Glenn and Abraham. He could've killed a lot more people than he did, but he didn't. Negan isn't evil, Rick. He's just, making some not so great choices," Rachel says.

Rick sighs. "You know, when all this is over, i want you to be a part of this community. You're still welcome here."

Rachel shakes her head. "I'm not sure i'll be able to do that," She makes her way back to the bars. "When you win, and you will, i have no doubt about that. I'll have to leave. Whatever you think about Negan, bad, evil, what the fuck ever? I love him. I've never told him that, but i do. And i won't be able to stay here," she swallows deeply, tears rolling down her cheeks. "I just won't."

Rick drops his head. "How can you love someone like that? After everything he's done?"

"I still love you, not in the same way obviously, but i do. A lot of the people you killed at the satellite post didn't deserve to die. They were good people, in spite of what you might think," she says.

Rick shifts his feet uncomfortably. "I'll go get you something to eat, i won't be long."

Rachel walks to the other side of the cell and drops down on the mattress.

* * *

"For Christ sake! When are they gonna show up with the fucking truck? They should've fucking been her by now!" Negan rages.

They had lost the night, still caged in by the dead outside the sanctuary. Negan had hardly slept a wink. He'd spent the night trying to convince himself that Rachel was okay, trying to come up with logical explanations as to why they hadn't heard from her. But it only served to worry him more, as he could hardly come up with any.

"I'm sure they'll be here soon," Simon assures him.

"They fucking better be!" Negan fumes, pacing across his room.

"So once the herd has cleared, and we've found Rachel, what's our next move?" Simon asks.

Negan rubs his temples. He looks out of his window. "We need to hit them hard, make an example of them, i-," Negan stops. "You hear that?"

Simon walks over to the window. "Sounds like it's on it's way," he smiles.

* * *

Negan watches as the herd clears, lead away by a truck blaring loud music from it's speakers. Negan thinks back to when him and Rachel did the same thing at the school. How he'd noticed the way she'd been looking at him. And how she had no idea he'd noticed.

"Christ! Can't they move fucking faster? It's a wonder anyone still get's fucking bit these days," Negan frowns.

"They'll move soon enough," Simon assures him.

"Do we have any trackers here?" Negan asks.

Simon shakes his head. "But Dwight thinks he knows which direction she went in."

Negan sits down on his sofa, nervously turning Lucille in his hands.

"You should eat something," Simon says.

"I'm not fucking hungry," Negan scowls, not taking his eyes from Lucille. "Just let me know when the herd has cleared enough."

"You want me to come with you when it does?" Simon asks.

Negan shakes his head. "No, i need you here, help keep this place in order. I'll take Dwight and Gareth."

* * *

Negan had been following Dwight through the woods for almost over an hour.

"Jesus Christ! Do you have any fucking idea where you're going?" Negan snaps at Dwight.

"Not really. All i know is that she went in this direction. She told me she wasn't gonna go too far," Dwight says.

Negan grabs Dwight's arm. "So it was you that let her fucking go out here?"

Dwight stares at him nervously. "She said you was alright with it. You know what she's like."

Negan gives him a cold stare, then releases his arm. "Just fucking find her."

Dwight nods and continues walking.

"She'll be alright," Gareth smiles.

Negan chuckles. "You still sweet on her, Gareth?"

Gareth glances over at Negan. "I.. i," he stutters, struggling to get his words out.

"Relax, Gareth," Negan smiles. "I get it. She's fucking hot. It's not a damn crime to look. Just make sure you keep it that fucking way."

Gareth nods.

"Negan, i think we got something," Dwight says from the distance.

Negan makes his way over to Dwight, staring at the ground.

"It's one of hers," Dwight says, pointing at the arrow sticking out of the walker's head.

"She wouldn't leave an arrow behind, not unless she had to," Negan frowns.

"All the gunfire from the sanctuary. A lot of the dead might of come through here. She probably didn't have time to collect it. Doesn't mean something bad happened to her. I mean look," Dwight points around the area. "There's no blood anywhere, so that's a good sign."

"So where the fuck is she?" Negan snaps.

Negan's radio begins to crackle. "Negan.. this..," static takes over the radio.

Negan frowns. "Who the fuck is this? Over."

He's met with nothing but static.

"That's long distance," Gareth pipes up.

Negan turns to him. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Whoever's on the radio is probably a good distance from here, i can tell," Gareth says. "I don't think it's one of our men. None of them are that far out anymore."

"We should head for the road. Might get a better reception," Dwight suggests.

"And what about Rachel?" Negan yells. "We're not even fucking close to finding her!"

"We'll find her," Dwight assures him. "Right now, we need to see who's on that radio. Gareth's right. It sounds long distance. So whoever's on that radio isn't one of us, and yet they have one of our radios."

Negan nods swiftly then heads for the road.

They stand at the side of the road. Negan presses the switch on the radio impatiently.

"This is Negan, who is this? Over," he frowns. He's met with silence. "Fuck!" Negan tosses the radio to Dwight. "I'm not hanging around waiting for someone who may or may not fucking radio through. I'm gonna go fucking find her," Negan heads down the road.

The radio begins to crackle in Dwight's hand. "Negan. This is Rick, over."

Negan stops in his tracks. He heads back to Dwight, snatching the radio from his hand. "Well hello there, Rick. What is this uh? You steal one of my radios from my men before you killed them?"

"No, i just took it from Rachel, i think you know her, over."

Negan's eyes widen. He squeezes Lucille tightly in his other hand, clenching his jaw. "What have you done with her? I swear, Rick. If you've hurt one goddamn hair on her head, i'll fucking kill you, you hear me?"

"She's alright, for now, over."

"Let me talk to her," Negan pleads.

"She's kinda busy right now, over."

"You cock sucking mother fucker! I'll fucking kill you! You hear me, Prick? I'm gonna rip your damn balls off! And fucking feed them to that skull faced one eyed fucking son of yours!" Negan rages.

"Really? I suggest you calm yourself, Negan. That's if you want her to stay breathing, over," Rick says.

"You wouldn't," Negan raises an eyebrow.

"You really wanna try me? I'm not gonna lie, i wouldn't want to hurt her. But i'll do whatever it takes to keep my people safe, over."

"Don't," Negan says. "Don't hurt her."

"That's more like it, over."

Negan lowers his head. "What do you want, Rick?"

"What i've wanted all along, your surrender. You come to Alexandria tomorrow at Dawn, and hand yourself over.. over."

* * *

"Negan, you can't seriously be thinking of surrendering?" Simon frowns.

Negan had arrived back at the sanctuary over an hour ago and had swiftly filled Simon in.

"Fuck no. But i can't just fucking show up there all guns blazing. I need something," Negan stresses, pounding his fist against the table. "I'm not surrendering. But i won't put her in danger either. We've got the night to come up with something, Simon. So think real fucking hard," Negan frowns staring out of the window.


	33. The Final Chapter

Negan drives down the road with his men behind him. There are eight trucks in all, and one van.

"You think this will give us the advantage?" Dwight asks from the passenger seat.

"It fucking better," Negan frowns, not taking his eyes from the road.

They pull up at the gates of Alexandria. Rick stands on the platform, a rifle in his hand.

Negan steps out of the truck, his men not far behind him.

"What kind of surrender is this?" Rick frowns.

"You really think i was gonna surrender?" Negan smiles. "You really are a stupid little prick."

Rick shifts his feet. "You really wanna do this?"

"I don't know? Maybe i do, let's see what fucking happens," Negan grins. "Dwight," Negan ushers with his hand towards the van.

Dwight walks towards the back of the van. Rick's eyes widen as he watches Dwight pull Daryl from the back of it.

"Look who i found," Negan licks his lips.

Dwight holds a gun to Daryl's head. Daryl pulls at the rope that binds his hands behind his back, but it's tied tight.

Rick clenches his jaw. "Let him go!"

"Sure thing, Rick. Right after you hand Rachel over. So be a good boy, and go fucking get her," Negan smiles.

"This wasn't the deal!" Rick spits.

"You don't fucking tell me what the deal is, Rick! Now go and fucking get her, or i have Dwight here, blow Daryl's brains out!" Negan yells.

Rick looks down at Gabriel. "Go get her."

Gabriel nods and walks off.

"Things are gonna get ugly, Rick. I fucking hate when things get ugly, so i'm gonna make you a one time only offer," Negan smiles.

"What's that?" Rick asks.

"We go through with this little swap, no one gets hurt. Then i drive the fuck away from here, and come back in one week as if nothing's fucking happened. All water under the fucking bridge, and we go back to being fuck buddies, what do you say, Rick?" Negan offers.

Rick pinches his nose. He looks down at Negan. "I say, go fuck yourself."

Negan chuckles. "Alright, if that's how you want it to be, then fine."

Rick turns around. He sees Gabriel heading towards him, empty handed. Rick frowns, stepping down from the platform. "Where is she?"

Gabriel swallows deeply. "She's gone."

Rick's eyes widen. "What do you mean she's gone? How can she be gone?" He spits.

"I found Shaun unconscious in her cell. He must have gone too close to her, she must have taken the key from him, i don't know," Gabriel shakes his head.

"Shit!" Rick curses under his breath. "Now what do we do? He has Daryl. Soon as he finds out Rachel isn't here, he's gonna kill him."

* * *

Rachel watches from the woods. Getting out had been easy, what with the pathetic excuse for a security guard. She'd fully intended to stop Negan further down the road, and convince him to go back to the sanctuary. Unfortunately, getting over the wall had taken longer than she'd thought. Just as she had gotten into the woods, Negan had begun to pull up outside the gates. Rachel knew exactly what would happen if Negan knew Rick didn't have her. So she waited, not quite sure what to do. A part of her wished she'd stayed in the cell. Coming out of the woods now would only serve to make Negan more confident, which would most likely cost Daryl his life. On the other hand, she had the rat to contend with. The rat, that currently had a gun aimed at Daryl's head. From what Rick had said, she was confident Dwight wouldn't shoot Daryl. What she was worried about, was Negan.

* * *

"Come on, Rick. I'm fucking waiting," Negan says impatiently.

Michonne walks over to Rick. "What do we do?"

"We're gonna have to do this now, and quick," Rick says. "Make sure everyone's ready. Just in case things don't go to plan."

Michonne nods, heading off to alert the others.

Rick stands behind the gate, staring over at Dwight.

"Well?" Negan holds out his arms, where the fuck is she?"

Rick makes eye contact with Dwight, then nods.

Dwight lowers the gun from Daryl's head.

Negan turns to Dwight. "What the fuck are you doing?"

Dwight takes a knife from his belt, and cuts Daryl loose. "It's over," Dwight says.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Negan frowns. Then he smiles, as he realises exactly who the rat is. "Oh, Dwight. You toast faced motherfucker."

Dwight passes a gun to Daryl. They both aim their guns at Negan.

Negan's saviors quickly aim their guns towards Daryl and Dwight.

"I wouldn't do that if i were you!" Rick shouts at the saviors. "I've got people all over the place ready to take a shot at you all. You start something and nobody will make it out, is that what you want?"

The saviors look at one another, unsure of what to do.

Negan grips Lucille tightly. "I can't wait to see you chained to my fence, Rick. Watching you rot will be the highlight of my fucking day."

"That's not gonna happen," Daryl smiles.

"You smug little cunt! I'll fucking wipe that smile off your motherfucking face!" Negan rages, lunging towards him. He knocks both Daryl and Dwight off their feet.

Negan's men begin to shoot at Alexandria.

"Remember what i said! No head shots unless you have to!" Rick yells, as his people begin to return fire.

Negan grapples with Daryl, but Dwight pulls him off. Negan takes a swing at Dwight with Lucille, missing by only an inch. He drops Lucille, and throws a punch at Dwight, knocking him off his feet.

Dwight aims his gun at Negan. A bullet shoots close by Dwight's ear, and he rolls away from the line of fire, hiding behind a truck.

Negan turns his attention to Daryl once again. "You, this is all fucking you!" He fumes. Negan tackles Daryl to the ground. He wraps his hands around Daryl's neck, squeezing tightly. "Little fucker! Just fucking die!"

Daryl brings his knee up into Negan's crotch, and Negan instantly releases his grip. Daryl rolls Negan off of him, then goes to grab his gun, but Negan gets to his feet and swings a punch at Daryl. It's a hard swing, right to the side of his head, and Daryl drops straight to the floor.

Negan chuckles. "That's more fucking like it!" Negan looks towards Rick. "See how you like this, prick!"

Rick watches as Negan grabs Lucille from the ground. "No!" Rick almost screams, as he frantically attempts to open the gate.

Negan watches Daryl slowly come to. "That's it, asshole, you get to your knees. I can get me a good side swing," Negan chuckles. He stands side on to Daryl, and begins to raise Lucille.

"Negan! Don't!" Rachel shouts. But he doesn't hear her.

Negan side swings Lucille towards Daryl. At the last split second, Negan see's what's happening, but not soon enough. Rachel jumps in front of Daryl. And even though Negan releases his grip on Lucille, she still swings into Rachel's face. Negan watches as Rachel falls to the ground, Lucille ripping at the side of her face as she does.

"Nooo!" He screams, quickly falling to his knees beside her. He pulls Lucille off her face, a flap of Rachel's skin coming away with it. "Rachel!" He yells, holding her in his arms. The right side of her face is a mess of blood. Negan pulls off his scarf, pressing it against her. His stomach turns as he sees her skin moving beneath his scarf. Tears roll down his cheeks. "Fuck, baby! I'm so sorry."

Rachel lies unconsciously in his arms.

Rick stands over Negan. He aims his gun. "Stand up."

Negan looks up at him, tears streaming down his face. He bares his teeth at Rick. "Fuck you, asshole!"

"Now!" Rick warns him.

Negan looks down at Rachel, tenderly stroking the other side of her face. He lays her down gently, then rises to his feet.

Negan goes to run at Rick. But Rick sees it. He takes out his knife and slashes at Negan's neck.

Negan puts his hand up to his neck. He holds his hand in front of his face in disbelief as it drips with blood.

Negan's saviors have taken notice. The shooting temporarily ceases.

"Everyone lower your weapons!" Rick orders. "It's done! This war is over! We have a Doctor who can save his life! Surrender and allow us to take him. We won't attack you. You can appoint a new leader, and return home. Decide now! Before he dies!"

Negan jumps at Rick, knocking him to the ground.

"Stay back!" Dwight orders the saviors. "Let them fight it out."

Negan kicks at Rick, one hand still clutching at his own throat. "Fu.. kill me?" Negan barely mouths as he kicks at Rick on the ground. "Kill you!"

Even with Negan pretty much bleeding to death, Rick struggles to get the better of him. Rick brings his leg up, throwing a kick at Negan.

"Fuck.. you," Negan slurs. He grabs Ricks leg, and snaps it forward.

Rick lets out a blood curdling scream.

"Fucker..," Negan chuckles. He begins to sway on his feet, then he drops to the ground.

Dwight grabs Lucille off the ground. "Stand down!" He shouts at the saviors, holding Lucille up in the air. "Put down your weapons. This war is over. Negan has fallen! If you want to survive, you'll follow me!"

One by one, the saviors slowly place their weapons on the ground.

The Doctor runs over to Rick. "Someone help me get him inside, we've got to set this leg fast!"

"No," Rick grimaces. "I'm going to live, make sure he does too," he points towards Negan.

"But your leg?"

"Can wait," Rick winces. "You save his life. And then you help her," he nods towards Rachel.

* * *

Rick hobbles towards the bed. "How is she?"

"She'll live," the Doctor nods. "I thought we were gonna have to do a skin graft. But it looked worse than it was. She's gonna have one hell of a scar though."

"She's alive, that's all that matters. Thank you," Rick smiles, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Rick steps into the back room of the infirmary. "You're awake, aren't you?"

"In and out," Negan groans. "Rachel?"

"She'll be fine, no thanks to you," Rick says.

Negan smiles briefly. "So what the fuck is this? What happens next?"

"Now, we're going to undo all the damage you've done. We're going to rebuild, and we're going to thrive. And you, you're going to rot in jail until you die an old man, Negan. You're fucked," Rick says.

* * *

Negan stares up at the ceiling. It had been two weeks since he'd first come to Alexandria, and apart from a twinge in his neck every now and then, he felt pretty much fine. Mentally, he felt far from fine. But he guesses he'll have to get used to that.

Negan hears footsteps coming down the stairs. "If that's you coming to taunt me again, Rick, then you can just head right back up those fucking stairs." Negan is met with silence. He turns towards the cell door. Rachel stands in front of it, her head slightly turned to her right, possibly in an attempt to hide the mess on her face. "Rachel," he almost whispers, not quite believing she's actually there. He gets up from the mattress and slowly makes his way over to her. "I can't believe you're here. I wasn't expecting to see you.. ever."

"Why would you think that?" She asks, still refusing to turn her face towards him.

"For the same fucking reason you won't look me in the eye. Look at me, Rachel. Let me see what i did to you."

Rachel shakes her head. "I don't want to."

"Since when were you so vain?" He smiles nervously.

A tear rolls down her cheek.

Negan tilts his head. "Fuck, i'm sorry. I was just.. you know, trying to lighten the mood, cheer you up. You know what i'm fucking like."

Rachel slowly looks up at him.

Negan's face drops and his heart almost breaks. There's a scar about three inches long running from her temple to her ear. Then another three scars, about two inches long running vertically from her cheekbone. "I'm so sorry. If it helps, you still look beautiful, and i fucking mean that," he assures her.

Rachel holds onto the bars, tears rolling down her cheeks. "What am i supposed to do?"

Negan stares at her, uncertain. "Well, i guess now i'm not in the picture, your life just got a whole fuck load easier."

"How can you say that?" She frowns. "Do you have any idea how much i'm hurting right now?"

"It'll get better. I mean, the scars might be there forever, but the-,"

"I'm not talking about my fucking face!" Rachel snaps. She takes her hand and places it against her chest. "This hurts."

"Don't, Rachel," Negan shakes his head.

"I, am so in love with you," she sobs.

Negan's heart pounds against his chest.

Rachel grabs his hand through the bars, holding it in hers. "I'll get you out of here. We can go away together, start fresh."

Negan stares at her, then he slowly shakes his head. "No, i can't do that."

"Why not?"

"Because it's no kind of life for you, Rachel. You deserve better," Negan frowns.

Rachel squeezes his hand. "You're all that i want, Negan."

Negan eyes begin to well up. He chokes back his tears and pushes her hand away. "I don't feel the same," he shakes his head. "You're.. you're not what i want."

"Negan," she sobs.

"I don't want you coming here, okay. Go fucking be with Daryl or some shit," Negan grimaces.

"Don't push me away," Rachel pleads.

"The fuck did i just say? Get the fuck out of here, and don't fucking come back!" He snaps, tears spilling down his cheeks.

Rachel turns away from him and runs up the stairs. Negan drops to the floor of his cell, holding his head in his hands.

"You did the right thing," comes a voice.

Negan lifts his head. He laughs half-heartedly, wiping at his face. "Were you fucking listening? I bet you think this is fucking hilarious, don't you, Rick?"

"What, seeing someone i consider family, heartbroken?" Rick shakes his head. "No, i don't. But you did the right thing. It's better for her if she moves on. And the easiest way for her to do that, is by getting over you."

"Well aren't you a fucking smartass," Negan sneers. "Why don't you just fuck off and leave me to rot in peace?"

"I will," Rick nods. "But i just thought you should know that you did the right thing, that's all."

Negan watches Rick hobble his way back up the stairs. He makes his way back over to his mattress, and continues staring at the ceiling till he falls asleep.


End file.
